Things remain the same, or maybe not
by BananaPudding
Summary: Sisfic continuation- Set in the future after the angels have fallen- The boys, Lara and Castiel are doing their usual routine of hunting, ganking and saving people- Until something happens that drastically alters all of their lives- How will they handle this unexpected turn of events? (There's language in this one also, so sensitive eyes beware)
1. Chapter 1

**_Alright, so- I thought I would write another AU that isn't following any of the shows plots. Since I don't know how season 9 and 10 are going to go down, I decided to make up my own version. I'm not sure if this could be considered fluff, but I know there's going to be some cutesy things going on. It's set into the future obviously, and basically it's going to just be them doing hunting jobs, until something unexpected happens. This is just a mini chapter to see how it's received- So here you go._**

* * *

Two years since the angels fell and all that shit went down- Two years that we had all been working together. In between jobs we spent our time at the bunker, home sweet home. Two years, ha- It almost seems crazy to think about that so much time had gone by and still things were pretty much the same as they always were. Life or death situations, crazy monsters, demons and pissed off angels after our heads- Yeah, that is our lives, and that was all it would consist of. Nope, no I'm not complaining at all, in fact- This was the way I wanted it. Of course I didn't like worrying about them, worrying that one day someone might actually kill them. But, this was our life. We saved people, as much as we could- We hunted, we researched, we ganked. Life life life in all its crazy glory.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Castiel was still with us- Human, of course because we had never found a way to get his grace back- But over the course of the two years he had adjusted pretty damn well. Dean still liked to refer to him as a hunter in training, even after all this time. It didn't really matter that he'd saved our asses numerous times, he was still a rookie as far as my big bro was concerned. As far as Cas and I? Well, ours was what you could say was an unusual relationship. Unusual because things were pretty much the same as they always had been, except a little of this and that every now and then, or practically every day. He might have been human, but his mind was still that of an angel and it would take far more than two years to let that fade. So, even though there had been no proclamations or promises made, it didn't matter. We were stuck together like glue and nothing was going to change that. Although the words "soul mates" had come from him a few times but that's as far as it went.

"Food-" Dean interrupted my day dreams, slamming his hand down on the table. "I'm hungry. Foooood."

I stared up from my laptop and shrugged. "You know where the kitchen is."

"Please-" He gave me his usual cheeky grin. "I'm starving and you said you'd make somethin."

"I regret ever allowing you people to know I could cook." I pushed myself away from the table. "Everyone agree on one thing cause I'm not a frickin restaurant here."

Sam looked up from his own laptop, while Cas lied his book aside. "I will settle with anything, Lara. I'm not finicky."

"Yeah, same here, kiddo." Sam smiled and went back to typing.

It's funny how I became the Mother of the bunker, but honestly I didn't mind. I actually liked taking care of my boys.

After entering the kitchen and searching through everything, I shook my head. We seriously needed to do some shopping. I had nothing to work with here but for a loaf of bread and a practically empty jar on peanut butter. The fridge was depressingly empty, with nothing but beer and two week old takeout leftovers. Yeah, ok. There wasn't a way I could cook anything in this kitchen so I returned to where the boys were researching.

"So I have good news and bad news." I said. "Good news, we have plenty of beer-" Dean cheered slightly. "Bad news is, someone's gotta go shopping. The kitchen's empty."

"What the hell? Didn't I just do that?" Dean protested.

"Yeah, like three weeks ago." Sam answered.

"So who wants to nominate themselves to go shopping?" I asked.

"I would-" Cas said. "But neither of you will allow me behind the wheel."

"And you know why." Dean snapped. "You put a dent in my baby, you're lucky I didn't kill you."

"That was over a _year _ago, and in my defense we were being chased by a pack of insane werewolves..." Cas looked at each of us for backup. "That tree came out of no where."

"Yeah, just jumped out at you, huh?" Dean scowled. "So, because of all these trees that apparently have legs, you're never drivin my car again."

Cas only frowned, and it didn't seem that anyone was wanting to go and do the shopping.

"Hey, guys-" Sam sat up straight. "I think I might have found something."

Dean sighed in relief. "Finally. It's been over a week, I'm getting antsy."

"What'd you find?" I asked, sitting- For the moment relieved that I wasn't going to have to do the shopping.

"Cheyenne Wyoming. A string of mysterious suicides, all of the victims had previously visited a reported haunted asylum that had closed down in the late 60s. Reports say that each person, all under the age of twenty five, broke into the place, then afterwards sank into a very mysterious depression." He clicked around. "Family members of the victims claim that they held no mental illness before hand, and afterwards became so sedentary they refused to eat or drink. Two young women slit their wrists, the other two simply starved to death."

Dean arched his brows. "So the victims were all women?"

"That's right. All under the age of twenty five, as I said- And, all pretty much fitting the same description. Long brown hair, average build."

Everyone immediately looked to myself.

"What?" I asked.

"Long brown hair, average build, if we take this case I doubt I'm the only only that thinks it _wouldn't_ be good idea if you joined in." Dean answered.

"Don't start that crap. Give me a little credit here."

Dean pushed himself away from the table. "Well let's pack up the car and get started. I'm about to go nuts here, I'm so bored."

Even though my eldest brother loved this bunker, his room and actually having a home to come back to- He was never truly happy until he was on the road with a job to do.

I started for my room with Castiel in tow. It was no big secret to anyone that quite a bit of his own belongings was stashed in there, since he spent the majority of his free time with me. Thankfully, the jokes from Dean had stopped about a year prior. He finally got it into his head that it wasn't just a little slap and tickle every now and then- And although I wouldn't go as far as to say it was a normal relationship, it was as normal as it could be considering who we both happened to be.

After stepping into my room, I rolled my eyes. Cas was usually pretty good at cleaning up his messes but occasionally he would forget to make the bed. Which is what he seemed to do that morning. The blankets were still in shambles, and the pillows were hanging halfway to the floor. But, it had been a long night, and no- Not for _that _reason. Cas was still haunted by nightmares almost every night, and because of that he didn't like to sleep alone. The entirety of the night before was spent with him waking up every half hour, and tossing and turning in between.

I began pulling out my clothes from the dresser and stuffing them into a duffel bag, while he searched for whatever he had underneath the bed and blankets. He finally found his hoodie, the very first one I had ever bought him after he became human. The thing was worn out, but he refused to throw it away and wore it everywhere. What can I say, the dude was sentimental?

Sometimes it still surprised me to see him dressed as a normal everyday guy. I still expected to look at him and see that clueless angel with a suit and trench coat. The one thing about him that still hadn't changed though was the emotionless monotone voice, and being devoid of expression, most of the time anyhow. There were occasions where he would crack a small smile or cringe at something unpleasant. Personally, I was glad that he hadn't changed. I wouldn't know what to think if Cas suddenly morphed into someone like Dean. It just wasn't who he was meant to be.

He caught myself gawking at him for once and remained blank faced.

"Is everything alright, Lara?" He asked.

"Yeah, fine. Just wanting to hit the road I guess."

"Are we going to be following in your car again? Or will we ride with Sam and Dean?"

"Dean hates when we follow, he can't torment us that way." I smirked, as did he.

I motioned towards my bag. "Aren't you going to pack some things?"

He nodded and grabbed what he had in my room before leaving and returning to his own bedroom. Honestly, I don't even know why he had it- He very rarely ever slept in it.

We took off not long after and started on the drive, which was going to be a long one. I settled in in my usual spot in the back seat with Cas opposite of me. Yeah, things definitely had not changed in the least.


	2. Chapter 2

_**It came to my attention after I posted the first chapter of this story- That I had completely forgotten to mention that this is a sisfic. So, for anyone who might come across this and are confused about who the heck Lara is, I would suggest reading my first story so it would make sense lol.**_

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When we got to town the first thing Dean did was pull to a stop in front of a two story victorian.

"Ok, same drill as always right, cupcake?" Dean asked, staring at me from the rear view mirror.

"Yep- Cas and I will grill the family- You guys check out the bodies." I said, grabbing my ugly blue jacket, then nudged Cas. "Ready?"

He nodded. "Of course."

We left the car and waited until Dean drove away before walking up the path and to the front door.

"Remember..."

"I know-" Cas interrupted, giving me a half smirk. "You do all the talking."

"K, and you just sit there and look pretty." I said, and he squinted at me after that comment. I knocked before he could question it.

It was only ten seconds before the door opened a crack and a man around the age of thirty peered out at us.

"Can I help you?" He asked.

I pulled my badge, as did Cas. "I'm Agent Tyler, this is my partner Agent Perry. We have a few questions about your wives death?"

He examined the badges for a moment before nodding and opening the door. "Come in."

He led us to the living room and already I could see it was covered in cheap occult decor- Something that only wannabe witches or goths might have. He himself was dressed in the typical solid black, with a chain wallet and combat boots.

"I've already said everything that needed to be said-" He started, taking a seat. "All your little cop buddies did was laugh at me."

I gave my mastered fake smile and sat on the couch, Cas sat beside me.

"Well, we're a little more open minded than others, so- Why don't you tell us what you told them and we'll see what we can do, hm?" I said.

He rolled his eyes. "Look, like I said already- My wife was not suicidal, she was the happiest person I know."

I glanced to the fireplace mantel and noticed a picture of him with the victim, and I wasn't one to stereotype or give someone labels, but she fit perfectly the description of an "emo".

"Really?" I arched a brow.

"Yes, you don't understand-" He sat up and rested his elbows on his knees. "You see, we're the co-founders of C.I.P.S."

"C.i.p.s?" I echoed. "And what would that be?"

"Cheyenne Paranormal Investigators Society." He replied.

Cas scrunched his brows. "Shouldn't it be CPIS? Not CIPS?"

I elbowed him lightly. "Ok, and what does this have to do with your wives death, sir?"

"Everything was fine until we investigated that damned lunatic asylum. We went there because some friends of ours told us about the rumor."

"Rumor? What rumor?" Cas asked.

"About the woman in room 502." He answered. "Story goes that she was admitted to the asylum back in the early 40's, was a complete head case and had thrown her infant twins off of a bridge. They said that she was stuck in that place for ten years before she slit her own wrists. So, we went there to check it out. The place is creepy as all hell but honestly we didn't get any readings on our equipment. Amy, my wife, insisted on staying alone in room 502, she was a medium and felt that she could connect with the spirit. We let her of course, because why wouldn't we?"

"Maybe because the spirit inside that room is capable of killing?" Cas replied, and yet again I elbowed him.

"Go on. What happened after that?" I prodded.

The man clearly didn't like Cas and kept giving him dirty looks. "Well, we found her almost two hours later slumped on the floor staring blankly at the wall. She wouldn't speak, and didn't even acknowledge us. It was as if she just checked out... A week later she was dead, slit her wrists in the bath-tub."

I sighed slightly and nodded. "Do you know anything about the other victims?"

He nodded fervently. "They were all members of C.I.P.S. After Amy died we decided to go back, to try again and somehow stop the spirit. But, the same thing happened to Alara, and then Becca a week later. A few days after that Tammy was gone."

"So, let me see if I'm understanding you correctly-" Cas sat up. "After your wife died, you went back a second time, another woman died, and you went back a third and _fourth_ time? Wasn't it obvious that you shouldn't have..."

"Ok-" I stood. "I think we've heard enough, but- Take some friendly advice, Sir. Don't go back to that place. I'm not agreeing that a _spirit_-" I tried to roll my eyes after that statement. "Had anything to do with the deaths, but you're still trespassing on private property."

"But it's our jobs... We learned from the best." He defended.

"The best?" Cas looked at me curiously.

"Ghostfacers. They have a website with tutorials on how to stop ghosts, even demons."

I tried not to snicker. While I had never met the infamous "Ghostfacers" personally I had heard plenty about them from Sam and Dean.

"That's very interesting." I said, choking back laughter. "We'll see ourselves out, thank you."

We left the way we came and once I was back outside on the porch I snorted back a chuckle.

"Wow, ok." I said. "Good job in there at being pretty."

"I'm sorry, but the things he was saying..."

"Yeah-" I interrupted. "Whackadoo. Well, sort of. I mean, yeah clearly it had something to do with a spirit which caused those chicks to bite it, but them actually starting a paranormal investigating team? Comon. Half a dozen rigged tv shows and now suddenly everyone thinks they can become ghost hunters?"

"What do we do now?"

"Call Sam and Dean, let them know what we found out." I pulled my phone from my jacket and dialed and put it on speaker. After a few rings Dean picked up.

"Whatcha got?" He answered.

"Yeah, dude. Ok, little info. All of the victims knew each other, apparently vic number 1 and her hubby were co-founders for their own little amateur ghost hunting league. The other women that died, all members."

"Ok good job, and?"

"And, story is that some chick from the 40's iced her kids, got stuck in the looney bin and now her pissed off spirit is causing people to off themselves."

"And killing themselves in the way she had-" Cas added. "By slitting their wrists."

Dean relayed the info to Sam before saying. "Ok, you know what to do now, cupcake."

"Yeah, library- How long are you gonna be?"

"We'll meet you there soon."

He hanged up on me and I grumbled. "Guess that means we're hoofing it."

Cas followed me down the sidewalk as I google mapped the library for Cheyenne. It was clear across town which caused me to curse lightly to myself. Instead of having to trek all the way to the other side of town I decided to instead find a cafe or someplace with wifi and do my usual bit of illegal activities to find the information I needed. After finding a coffee shop I took a table in the back corner while Cas got his caffeine fix. I swear, the dude chugged coffee liked no bodies business.

After he sat in front of me he slid a cup of coffee across the table towards me.

"Have you found anything?"

I sighed. "Apparently it's not so easy getting access to old patient files for an insane asylum that closed down in the 60's. There was a fire in 1955 that destroyed more than half the records."

His brows furrowed. "And there is no other way?"

"Time travel?" I replied sarcastically. "Well, if there's even a patient like the one described had existed, I have a feeling there isn't any documentation left anymore- Because seriously, when is luck ever on our side?"

"So, what now?"

"Option number 2, I guess. Gonna see if there was ever a woman in Cheyenne that threw her kids off a bridge."

I started tapping on my i-pad, and after fifteen minutes my phone started buzzing. I pulled it free and noticed it was Sam.

"Yeah?" I answered.

"You're not at the library-" He said. "Where are you?"

"Umbridge coffee shop." I said. "And before you ask, I can't really find much info on the former patients at the hospital, and there's absolutely no news reports on a woman that killed her kids in the 40's."

"So basically a big fat nothing." Sam sighed. "Ok, we're on our way there, then I guess we'll head to the hospital."

I hanged up and put my i-pad away, noticing Cas with his eyes on me. It wasn't uncommon really, because he had done that since... Well, forever. But normally now a days whenever I would catch him gawking he had something on his mind.

"What's up?" I asked.

"I was thinking-" He answered, with his usual scrunched brows. "Maybe I should call you by a pet nick name like Sam and Dean. Do you think that would be acceptable?"

My brows arched. "Um, why exactly?"

"It's a term of endearment, isn't it?"

"Sometimes. Unless you're Dean and only do it to annoy me. I don't think dumb-ass or dip-shit is a term of endearment."

He rolled his eyes. "No, I don't mean it like that. But, isn't that what normal people do who're in a relationship?"

Now I had to blink a few times over, that was the first he had ever referred to he and I being in some sort of relationship. Ok yeah it was kind of obvious, but he had never said it.

"Urr-" I fumbled. "Yeah I guess some people do that, Cas- But we never have. Don't you think it would be weird if you suddenly started doing it?"

He frowned slightly. "Do _you _think it would be _weird_?"

"Honestly, maybe a little. It would have been different had you done that from the very beginning, but you haven't. It's like having a name like Elizabeth, and being called Liz all of your life and then suddenly everyone starts calling you Beth, or Eliza- It just doesn't feel natural. Or, what if we just decided to start calling you Castiel after all of the years of you being Cas- Wouldn't that be weird?"

"Well it is my name..." He thought it over for a moment. "But I suppose it would feel strange since I've grown accustomed to being referred to as Cas. But isn't that slightly different then a pet name?"

"I'm not a dog, babe-" I shrugged. "And I think you know by now that I'm not a normal chick."

His frown wouldn't fade. "But you, on occasion, call me certain names, just as you did now."

"But I've done that from the beginning, which is why it's not weird."

"Still, I think I'd like to try it, if you wouldn't mind?"

Well this was going to be amusing, I tried to hide my smirking by taking a sip of coffee.

"Go for it if you really want to." I replied.

He smiled slightly and went deep in thought, probably trying to think of the perfect nick name for me. When the door opened and Sam and Dean stepped in I waved them over to our table.

Dean went straight for the pie rack at the counter while Sam sat beside me. Pretty soon Dean joined us with a slice of cherry pie and a big stupid grin on his face.

"So what now, guys?" I asked. "We just gonna charge into the asylum guns blazing?"

"I don't think that would be such a good idea-" Cas said. "Since you fit the description of every other victim, honey."

Dean froze with a mouth full of pie. "Honey?"

"He's trying something new." I said, waving it off. "And, even if I do fit the description, if I just avoid room 502, I think I should be ok."

"502?" Sam asked.

"Apparently that's where the spirit likes to hang out, of course I'm going by the crazy blatherings of a wannabe ghost hunter here, so there's no way of knowing how accurate it is."

"So we have a rumor about a woman who killed her kids that never existed, and no way of tracking down whose spirit it might be?" Sam nodded. "Great, sounds like every other ghost job we take."

"Well," Dean scraped his plate clean. "Let's get out there then. We're not gonna get anywhere without checking it out."

We left the cafe and started towards the edge of town where the abandoned hospital lingered. I stripped of my ugly blue jacket and replaced it with my usual, and took my hair down from the unflattering bun I always twisted it in when impersonating a fed. Once we pulled to a stop outside the large six story building, we started sifting through our weapons in the trunk-Pulling out our shot guns filled with salt rounds.

"Ya know I just realized-" Dean said. "We've gone all this time and you still haven't gotten your anti possession tattoo. All of these demons, and all of the times you've could have been possessed..."

Sam and Dean glared at me, and I shook my head. "How many billions of times do I have to tell you I already have one?"

"That's crap, if you do then where the hell is it? Cause I sure as hell haven't seen it?"

"Me either." Sam smirked.

"It's near her pelvis-" Cas answered nonchalantly, examining his shot gun, only stopping once he realized I was glaring at him with a cinched mouth and Dean and Sam were trying not to laugh. "I-I mean..." He panicked. "I noticed that long before we ever started having intercourse, it was ages ago- Before I became human..."

"Cas-" I felt my face turn red. "Stop talking."

"Wait-" Dean held up his finger. "So that means... He saw you naked when he was still an angel? Dude, what the hell?"

Cas looked like he was going to swallow his own tongue. "It was an accident, and technically she wasn't nude at the time. In her defense, she was still inebriated from the night before."

"Seriously-" I smacked his arm. "Stop talking."

Dean was clearly enjoying this but Sam looked like he wanted to hide under the car.

"This is awesome." Dean chuckled. "This is the first time anyone has been able to embarrass the crap outa her. Please, just let me cherish this moment for a second."

"Dean..." Sam grumbled. "Just as always you seem to forget that Lara is our sister and not some random bimbo. What she and Cas do on their own time isn't any of our business."

"Thank you!" I huffed. "Although right at this second I doubt _that _will be happening again any time soon." That was of course a lie, but it was priceless seeing Cas' face go flat. "Can we please just get this over with?"

I slammed the trunk closed and stomped off towards the chain link fence surrounding the building as everyone followed.

"Comon, just spill a little something-" Dean prodded. "Of course I don't want gory details cause that would just be gross, but you gotta give me something."

"Why?" I seriously wanted to smack the crap out of him.

"Because, it's Cas, that's why."

"What do I have to do with any of this?" Cas asked.

"You're banging my sister, dude-" Dean shrugged and still my face burned red. "I don't care how long it's been, you two have been so hush hush over everything Sammy and me don't know what to think."

"Maybe that's cause it's none of your business?" I retorted. "I don't ask you about the chicks you sleep with."

"Maybe that's because there's so many of them." Sam chuckled.

"Seriously, let's change the subject now." I stopped at the fence that had clearly been cut in the past. "Before I fling myself off the nearest bridge."

"Wait-" Dean grabbed my arm. "Before we go in let's settle this."

"Oh my god-" I hid my face in my hands. "Why? Why do we have to settle anything?"

"Cause you're my sister, that's why. And yeah, I joke around, ha ha ha, but it's kinda my job to protect you."

"From Cas?" Sam was taken aback. "Why, uh, you think he's just gonna take off and ditch her?"

Cas was more confused than I had ever seen, and I just knew he was wondering how announcing where my anti possession tattoo was located had somehow reverted into a "Where is this relationship going" conversation.

"Why now?" I shrugged. "It's been almost three years, why now suddenly do you give a crap?"

He sighed. "Ok, well- I guess I ignored what had been happening, it's kinda gross to think about my sister banging some guy."

"Uh, Dean-" Cas lightly tapped him on his arm. "I'm standing right here, and technically I'm not just _"some guy"_. I would prefer if you wouldn't speak of me as if I'm invisible and stop saying I'm simply "_banging" _your sister." He scrunched his brows. "Even though I'm not one hundred percent certain what banging pertains to, although I think I understand, but there are so many euphemisms for that I could be mistaken."

"You're not." I scowled. "And Dean just needs to mind his own business."

"I agree-" Sam looked physically ill by this point. "They're both adults, and are capable of making up their own minds. Seriously, Dean- Just drop it. Did you really think that all of this time has passed and nothing happened?"

Dean shifted on his feet, an apparent frown creasing his face. "I lived in blissful ignorance, ok? I mean, the dude was a friggin angel for a billion years. And, I'm the oldest, and that means I need to give my permission, or he should have at least asked me first, comon."

"It's not the 1950s anymore, Dean." I crossed my arms. "And not to upset you, but you're not my Father. Now can we stop with this already and go gank a ghost?"

Seriously how the hell did this even start?

"Fine-" He relented. "But I'm not done, you and me-" He pointed to Cas. "We're gonna have a little talk once this is over."

Poor Cas looked petrified.

"Ignore him, he's a dumb-ass." I said. "See, _not _a term of endearment."

I smirked and slipped through the gap in the fence and the boys followed. Dean led the way around the side of the massive building until coming to a busted window we could climb through.

The boys climbed in first then Sam helped lug me up. The first room we stood in seemed to be a waiting area, or maybe what had been a recreation room for past patients. There were remnants of wooden tables lying in pieces, an old faded woven rug in the middle of the floor that was covered in bird droppings- And even a busted box television with the rabbit ears still attached. Creepy yes, but that was like any abandoned building. There was just something frightening about an old run down place still furnished with belongings of people long sense passed away. It was also solemn and depressing in a way.

Dean started for a door that was hanging off its hinges, once we reached a long open hallway he pointed to his eyes then straight ahead- Giving Cas and I the orders of checking out that area. I nodded and started down the hall that was lined with doors.

Cas followed behind me, careful of where he stepped. There was broken glass and other debris scattered across the floors, not to mention graffiti and other vandalism spray painted on the walls. So far there were no cold spots, nothing that showed any signs of a haunting anyways.

We stopped at the end of the hall which was where a set of stairs waited. I started up but Cas grabbed my wrist.

"I think it would be better if Sam and Dean inspected the upper levels." He said.

"Why?"

"Remember? Room 502?"

I stared upwards slightly. "Yeah, so we'll just avoid the fifth floor, ok?"

His squinty eyes told me that he wasn't satisfied with that, and he would rather me just avoid going upstairs at all- But he knew better than to attempt to argue with me by now, so instead he followed me upstairs. And it wasn't much better than the first floor, actually it was ten times worse. There were actually holes in the floors, going clear through until you could see the rooms underneath them. The walls were peeling paint and were covered in mold and cobwebs. It smelled terrible up there, like dead things and animal crap.

The rooms still held rusted metal bed frames, a few strewn pieces of old clothing, a few even had ratty teddy bears or filthy porcelain dolls.

Cas and I stopped in the middle of the hallway, and he was on edge. Normally he kept his cool pretty well, always maintaining the same stoicism that he held while being an angel- But this place had his eyes shifting in all directions, and sweat was starting to form on his hairline and upper lip.

"You ok?" I asked.

He nodded. "I'm fine. I'm just not particularly fond of this place."

"Do you wanna leave?"

"No, it's not that I'm afraid, Lara. It's just a... It's just a feeling."

I stepped closer and grabbed his hand. "You wanna elaborate?"

"I don't know how-" He swallowed hard. "I just think we should leave."

"Well, we can't leave until we take this spirit out, Cas. She's killing people, which means if we don't stop her then she'll just keep on doing it." I tried giving a reassuring smile which he didn't return. "It'll be ok."

I tried to walk away but his grip tightened on my hand. "Let's just... Do it quickly, alright?"

I chewed the inside of my cheek to try and resist the urge to turn that into a dirty joke.

"Ok, well a quickie sounds fun, but unfortunately we got work to do." Yeah, I failed. It was all Deans fault and Cas only squinted his eyes at me. Really, I got way too much entertainment in him not understanding my innuendos. "Listen, just check out a few of the rooms, and I'll get these."

I motioned over my shoulder and he shook his head. "I don't think it would be wise to separate."

"Cas..." I moved in closer and stared up into his eyes. "I've been doing this since I was a kid, I know what I'm doing. So do you. Nothing is going to happen, I promise."

He sighed and moved his eyes from mine. "You always manage to persuade me even when it's against my better judgement. Sometimes that isn't always a good thing, Lara."

"Maybe, but you do have a tendency to worry too much." I smiled.

"I have every right when it concerns you."

I shrugged. "Fair enough, ok. So, let's make a little deal then. We'll just check out this floor, then go back down where Sam and Dean are. I really don't think we're going to find anything, it's pretty quiet."

Of course he didn't want to agree to it, but he did anyhow. Yeah I knew sometimes, especially during moments like these, having him agree to something like that was stupid. But, everyone knows how I am... Sometimes I can be too cocky and make rash decisions without thinking of the outcome. And normally those instances ended up semi ok, how was I to know that it wouldn't end up that way this time?

Cas stepped through the hall and into the room across from the one I entered. For five minutes we moved from room to room finding absolutely nothing. This place was eerily silent for supposedly being haunted. There wasn't so much as a cold spot, and definitely not a blip on our EMF detectors. I was beginning to wonder if we were even going to find anything at all, that is... Until I heard a slight shuffle of feet from the corner of the room I stood in.

I swung around quickly intent with blasting whoever might have been there full of rock salt, but felt myself freeze. Everything inside of me went completely cold, my heart-rate slowed, my eyes widened in shock.

I was looking at myself. An exact replica, as though I were simply standing in front of a mirror and gazing at my own reflection. Instantly I knew it was a doppelganger, a so called messenger of death. It was well known that if you caught a glimpse of one then it would bring about your own demise, but I just couldn't look away. I tried to call out for help, but couldn't. The spirit version of me glided across the floor and closer towards me- Just passing a broken mirror that hanged on the wall. I saw the reflection of her true form. It was a young girl, probably around the age of sixteen with long black hair and pale skin. Her dress was tattered and stained, vintage style of the 1920s. Just as soon as I saw it, she faded away and I felt my knees collapse from under me.

I was completely coherent, I knew what was happening around me but for some odd reason I just couldn't move, I couldn't speak. The only thing I could do was sit there slumped on the ground staring at the area where the spirit had been. I'm not sure how much time passed that I sat there, but I could hear voices shouting in the distance. It was the boys, they were screaming my name over and over again and no matter how desperately I wanted to call out to them as well- I couldn't. I was trapped in my own mind, my body wasn't mine to control anymore.

There were pounding footsteps approaching the room I was in, as whomever was in the doorway skidded to a stop.

"Dean, Sam... In here, I found her!" It was Cas, obviously.

He rushed to in front of me and knelt down and still I couldn't move.

"Lara?" He dropped his weapon and leaned closer cupping his hand on my cheek. "Lara? What happened? Are you hurt?"

No I wasn't hurt, dammit- But I clearly couldn't tell him that. What the hell was happening?!

More footsteps approached as Sam and Dean ran into the room. Dean pushed Cas aside and crouched down in front of me.

"Hey, cupcake. Comon, talk to us- What the hell happened?" He said.

The only thing my body managed to do was blink. God dammit why couldn't one of them be a telepath so they could hear how my mind was screaming at them?

"Cas, what happened?" Sam asked.

"I don't know. We separated, it was only five minutes and when I called out to her she didn't answer. I searched the entire level we were on and she wasn't there."

"Ya think?" Dean shook me slightly by the shoulders. "Lara, how the hell did you end up in room 502?"

Uhh, what? No I wasn't in room 502, I was on the second floor just two minutes ago, what the hell?

"I don't think she can hear us." Sam said, brushing his hair from his forehead. "We need to get her out of here."

"Not until we gank the bitch that did this, Sam. Look at her, she's friggin catatonic!" Dean protested.

"Yeah, and that spirit is still running loose in here- We need to get her out and find out who it is so we can take care of it." Sam reached down and pulled me to my feet, when he noticed I wasn't going to walk, or couldn't, he scooped me up. "Come on."

I was like a friggin rag doll and could barely even hold my own head up as Sam carried me down five flights of stairs I didn't even remember climbing. When we reached the outdoors I stared up at the night sky in confusion. Ok, exactly how long were we in there anyways? Because not thirty minutes ago it was noon.

Sam lied me carefully in the backseat with Cas and Dean sped us back to the nearest motel.


	3. Chapter 3

From the moment they carried me into our motel room I had been sitting on the bed propped against the headboard still unable to take my eyes off of staring blankly ahead. This was really starting to tick me off, unable to move or speak but completely able to hear what was going on around me.

"Cas..." Dean was pissed, more pissed than I had seen him in a long time. "You want to explain to me just why the fuck you left her alone?"

Cas shifted slightly on the edge of the bed, he had been sitting beside me since the moment they sat me down and hadn't budged.

"Lara insisted upon it, we were on the second floor- No where near the fifth, I didn't think this would happen." He answered.

"You should have known better, man. She fits the profile of every other damned vic that's been killed in that place!"

"Dean-" Sam sighed. "There's no need to go placing blame. Cas didn't know this would happen, neither did Lara."

"Still-" Dean crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. "I'm getting friggin tired of this crap. Seriously, Cas- When are you gonna learn, huh? Yeah, you and my sister are... Whatever the hell you two call yourselves, but one of these days you need to figure it out."

Cas flew to his feet "Figure _what _out, Dean? What are you implying?"

Sam stepped in between them. "Dean, just drop it."

"No, Sam-" Cas shook his head. "I want to know what he's implying."

"Ok, you want me to say it?" Dean pushed away from the wall. "You don't have the first clue on how to watch her back now that you're human. Hell, even when you were an angel you made mistakes that nearly got us, _her_, killed. Things are different now, and instead of worrying about pissing her off you need to listen to your instincts. Lemme guess what happened, she wanted to separate, you didn't, but she worked her charm as she usually does in those situations and your brain went below your belt, right?"

Well this was just awesome... Here I was frozen like a mannequin while Cas and Dean were going to have a throw down. I couldn't even speak up to defend Cas, because this wasn't his fault- But of course Dean was just quick to jump all over him. Still, even after the years that had passed and Cas having our backs he didn't trust him completely. There was always that little lingering doubt in the back of my oldest brothers mind that just wouldn't let him forgive and forget.

After Deans question, I could see Cas' hands clench into fists at his side.

"Guys!" Sam rose his hands to stop them from pummeling each other. "This isn't the time for your little bitch fight. We need to find the bones that spirit belongs to, remember?!"

They glared at each other, both looking as though fire would shoot from their eyes before Dean was the first turn away.

"Right, ok, so what do we know so far?" Dean sat down at the table and chugged at a beer.

Oh that beer looked good, but dammit I couldn't even eat or drink.

"Every lead was a big fat nothing." Sam sighed, sitting as well. "Rumor was it was a woman from the 40's, but from what we've found so far she didn't even exist."

"And what we know as far as the victims are concerned-" Cas said, his tone quiet. "Every one went into the same state as Lara, and after a week passed..."

He stopped and if I could have finished that sentence for him I would have.

"They killed themselves, in one way or another." Sam finished instead.

"So we have a week." Dean nodded. "We better get to work. Here's what's gonna happen. Sammy and me, we're gonna do all the research, and Cas-" He paused, and so returned the dagger eyes. "You're going to keep your eyes on her every friggin second of the day, understand? Those vics sliced their wrists in the bathtub, we're not gonna let that happen... Are we?"

Cas' jaw clenched. "You know better than to ask me that."

If I could have bitch slapped them with my mind I surely would have done that by now. But, unfortunately I had no choice but to just sit there like a worthless lump of nothing.

How was I supposed to tell them what I saw? That at first sight I thought it was a doppelganger, but after noticing the reflection of the spirit I could see it was actually a young girl. And judging by her clothing style I would guess she was from the 20s, not the 40s. The asylum was _built_ in the 40s, which meant that this girl, whoever she was, must have been attached to the land somehow, or whatever the building might have been if it was anything before being turned into the hospital. She clearly died when she was a teenager, long before that place ever existed. Ugh, if only I could move a friggin hand or something so I could write this crap down!

The next few hours were incredibly frustrating listening to them come up with dozens of theories that weren't even close to being accurate. They were still focusing on this fictional woman that threw her kids off of a bridge and weren't even bothering to explore any other options. Of course, how would they know that it was a dead chick masquerading around as a doppelganger and putting them in some sort of catatonic state until they slowly went insane and slashed their wrists? Nah, they couldn't come up with that on their own.

Once morning came and I sat awake all night staring at the damned wall Sam and Dean announced they were going to hit the library and local historians to see if they could dig up any info on the hospital and patients. Cas was ordered yet again by Dean to not take his eyes off of me for a second, and once they were gone he bolted the door closed and sat beside me on the bed.

I was so exhausted it wasn't even funny, but whatever was going on with me wouldn't even allow my mind to shut off to get some sleep. I had absolutely no control, other than my frickin blinking.

Wait... Blinking! I could blink! Ok yeah big whoop right, but it was something. But if I could at least get their attention with my crazy blinks maybe they would realize that I was still coherent enough to understand what was happening.

"I'm so sorry that this happened, Lara." Cas said, sighing deeply. "Dean was right. I should have listened to my instincts, and they were clearly telling me that us separating was a mistake."

I blinked literally ten times in a row hoping he would notice, but of course he was oblivious.

"When I think of everything that I've done wrong... I keep asking myself how I keep making so many mistakes? Why do I never seem to learn?"

Dammit... I hated when Cas got like this. Especially now since I couldn't give him any words of encouragement.

I felt him take hold of my hand, enclosing it with the other- And there was definitely a lesson to be learned here. I needed to knock this crap off. Just because Cas and I were, whatever you wanted to call us, didn't mean that I could sit back and think things were as they had been so long ago. Back when he was an angel and I somehow managed to persuade him into things he wasn't exactly too keen on- I couldn't do that now. Things were different. He wasn't an angel anymore, which meant he had limitations. He needed to learn how to use his own mind, and I needed to stop being so damned manipulative. No I didn't do it intentionally exactly, but I did know that Cas had a hard time actually saying no to me, which I suppose I took advantage of sometimes. Yeah... I was stupid. But, like I said before- I was cocky and never really took into consideration that something actually could go drastically wrong. Pretty stupid, seeing is that we were constantly up to our eyeballs in danger.

"I don't care what Dean says-" He went on. "I'm not going to let anything happen to you, Lara. I know that I seem to do a pretty pathetic job at protecting you, but... Honestly, that's all I want to do. That thought has been ingrained into my mind since the moment I met you. And believe it or not, every choice I've made over the years was made solely because I thought it would be what's best for making sure you were safe." He sighed deeply and shook his head. "And still, somehow, everything seems to go wrong."

Somehow by a miracle I managed to shift my gazes towards him instead of on the wall in front of me. If he would just pry his eyes off of his damned lap then he would notice. When he finally did look up at me he actually jumped slightly. I guess it must have been pretty damned creepy seeing me like that, I could only imagine how messed up it seemed.

"Lara?" He scooted closer. "Can you hear me?"

I blinked several times in a row and his brows furrowed.

"Was that a yes?"

I repeated the action.

His eyes widened slightly and he jumped to his feet and grabbed his cell. He dialed Sam or Dean, I didn't know which but I could hear it ringing.

"Dean..." Well I guess that answered my question of who he called. "Lara, she's responding to me somehow..." He paused and I could barely hear Dean speaking. "No, not with words. But I firmly believe she can understand what I was saying to her. I think you should come back." More voices. "Yes, I'll see what I can do... I understand."

He hung up and lied his phone aside, then grabbed the motels stationary and a pen and sat down in front of me.

"Dean wants me to ask you questions and if you can answer, he says to blink once for yes, and twice for no... Do you understand?"

I blinked once and hoped I was successfully giving him a bitch face. I wasn't an imbecile, but I was incredibly frustrated.

He nodded at my response.

"He wants me to ask if it was a spirit you saw?"

Yet again I blinked once.

"Was it a male or female? Once for male..."

I blinked twice, already knowing where he was going with this. He quickly jotted it down.

"Was there anything unusual about this woman?"

Another yes.

He let out a sigh and tried to figure out a way of asking how, I could tell by the constipated look on his face.

"Do you think it could be the woman the man from yesterday spoke about?"

Now a no. My eyes were getting dry.

"Was she old, or young, I think you know where I'm going with this. Once for old..."

I blinked twice and somehow, even though this situation was incredibly messed up I wanted to laugh.

"Younger than you?" When I said yes he gave a small smile. "A teenager?" He wrote everything down and I could hear the engine of the impala rumble its way outside the motel. He stood and peered out the window and then opened the door as Sam and Dean rushed inside.

Sam was the first to reach me as he sat down on the edge of the bed. "What has she said so far, Cas?"

"That it was a female spirit, a teenager. That's all I managed so far." He answered. "And that it wasn't who the rumors spoke about, which would make sense seeing is that it's a young girl."

"Dean, is there anything about a patient at the hospital in room 502 that was died a teenager?" Sam asked.

Dean flipped open a folder he was carrying and started scaling through what was printed up- But seeing is that this place had been a hospital for decades it would take a while.

"For that particular room." Dean finally answered after what felt like an eternity. "No teenage girls. One eighteen year old dude that was released after three months. He didn't die there."

"What about the entire hospital, Dean?" Cas asked.

"No reports of teens dying in the building- But, some of the records were burnt up in that damned fire."

Sams brows furrowed and I could tell he was finally thinking outside the box.

"Maybe it doesn't have to do with the hospital at all? What do we know about the building, or the land, before it was used as an asylum?" He asked, and I felt like cheering.

Dean grabbed another folder he dragged in with him and pulled out a few random pieces of paper.

"Before the hospital was built the property belonged to a woman called Martha Rogerst. She apparently ran a home for wayward orphans back in the early 1900's, and-" He held up another paper. "Until 1938 when she sold the property and they demolished the house and started building the hospital."

Sam nodded. "Any deaths on the property?"

"Uh, yeah-" Dean snickered. "Over the course of twenty years ten kids mysteriously bit it."

"And were any of them a teenage girl?" Cas asked now.

Deans eyes scaled the paper before an eyebrow arched. "Ok, think I got somethin... Twin girls Annabel and Metilda Mathews, came to the wayward home in 1922, within a year Annabel was found in the bathtub with her wrists slashed, but- It wasn't suicide, her twin sister was accused of killing her."

Twin sisters, huh? Ok, so before Sam could somehow figure it out I was going to try. This girl was killed by her twin sister, don't know why and that doesn't really matter- But what she was doing now was running around acting like a friggin doppelganger and forcing people to kill themselves in the way she was killed? No... Wait a second, something wasn't right about this.

"Lara?" Sam leaned over and got in my face. "Do you think that that could be the girl?"

Ugh how was I supposed to know that? It would require actually seeing a picture.

I glared at Sam as well as I could, hoping that he would somehow read my mind or at least the look in my eyes enough to know that I had no real way of answering that questions.

He frowned slightly and I could just see the gears turning in his head. "Dean, is there a picture of these kids?"

"Group photo of all the kids from 1922." He held up the copy of the picture. "Twin girls are in the front row."

Dean brought the picture over and held it in front of my face. I stared at the two girls in the front, one had long black hair the others was cut to jaw length. The one with the long hair was definitely the girl I saw in the mirror.

"Is that her, Lara?" Sam asked, smiling.

I blinked twice in a row. But still... Something didn't seem right.

"Ok, good. That's good." He stood. "Do we know where they're buried?"

Dean scowled. "Murdered chick was buried on the property, the sister's buried in the towns cemetery."

"Then let's go, everyone grab a shovel-" Sam flicked his eyes towards me. "Well, all but you."

Now I think I did preform a perfect bitch face, which made Sam flinch.


	4. Chapter 4

This whole being a vegetable thing was really starting to tick me off. I was stuck in the backseat of the car as we drove back to the asylum and past a gap in the fence. Dean practically tore up the yard as he drove through it trying to find the area where this chick was buried. When we finally came to a patch of trees that the impala clearly wouldn't fit through, he cut the engine and they climbed out. For a moment it seemed everyone forgot that I couldn't exactly follow, and after making it halfway to the trees Sam stopped, turned and jogged back to get me.

They were lucky they couldn't hear what I was thinking right now. Because it certainly wasn't something pleasant.

He carried me through the trees with Cas following quickly behind us, he was carrying a shovel in one hand, and a can of gasoline in the other. Dean as well had a shovel, and his duffel bag with salt and shot guns.

Past the tree line was the remnants of a small cemetery, obviously not a public one, but from the former inhabitants of the wayward home. The headstones were all but smashed to smithereens and as I was sat down to rest against a tree, all three boys started searching through the graves to find the correct one.

Once they found it, thankfully it wasn't long because there was only ten graves in total, Dean started to dig.

It wasn't long before the area grew frigid, which was strange seeing is that we were outdoors. A fog rolled in and surrounded us and Cas immediately inched his way closer towards me.

"Ok..." Dean said, eying the fog. "I'm sure this can't be a good sign."

"Hurry up-" Sam said, grabbing the second shovel. "Dig."

They both started to frantically dig but it didn't matter, the fog was slowly starting to form in the obvious shape of a person. Limbs became distinguishable, then a dress, jaw length black hair and finally the face of a teenage girl whose expression was that of distress and sadness.

"Wait!" She called out. Her voice sounded almost like an echo. "You're making a mistake!"

No kidding they were making a mistake, this chick wasn't the one I saw in the asylum, it was her sister- As was so obvious by the slash marks on her wrists. Which meant it wasn't the murdered girl doing the killing, it was the twin sister.

Dean didn't listen to the girl and instead blasted her full of rock salt. She vanished for several long seconds before reappearing beside me.

"You're making a mistake!" She shouted again, then with a shot she flew at me and I felt myself being invaded.

The fog seeped into my chest, to the point where I could feel my hands and feet began to move. My body was lifted off the ground and I felt myself walking.

"It wasn't me." She spoke through me, and the boys only stared at me in terror. "She's doing it... My sister, she's killing those girls."

"Right-" Dean lunged at me with a container of salt in his hand and tried to shove it down my throat, but this girl was strong, and managed to push him away.

Now I started frantically running through the trees and back towards the impala that was in the distance. Of course not by my own control, but my mind was still awake and alert.

"I'm not going to hurt you." She said, still speaking with my voice as she ran. "I'm going to make this right."

_Why are you doing this?_ I asked inwardly.

"She's crazy, my sister. She's been doing this for decades and I've tried desperately to find someone to listen to me, but no one would. Finally now I have the means of stopping her. I swear to you, I won't harm you. I'm only using you to stop her."

_You don't know how. You need those men back there to help you. You have to dig up her bones, salt them and burn them, or else her spirit will just come back_.

I felt my feet skid to a stop.

"Salt and burn? This is the means of stopping a spirit?"

_Yeah, it's not easy and it won't be pretty, but it's the only way. If you don't find a way of doing it quickly, or at least talking to them they're going to burn your bones and I'll be back to the zombie your sister turned me in to._

"How am I to convince them that I'm not a threat?"

_Is there anyway you can let me talk to them? I haven't exactly been possessed by ghosts before, so can you take a little siesta in my head and let me talk?_

She stared down at the ground, and I saw my own feet fidget.

"That might be a possibility, but how do I know I can trust you?"

_Because if we don't work together then in a week I'll be dead. I don't want to whack myself, kid._

I could hear pounding footsteps approaching from behind, and felt myself swing around as I, or well _she_, rose my hand.  
"Wait!" She said. "This girl wants to speak to you."

It was incredibly hard trying to force my own words out. It felt like treading through waist deep mud, trying to pull and pull and barely making any progress.

"You're smoking the wrong ghost." I felt myself say, finally. "It's not her, it's the sister."

Dean and Sam exchanged glances and Cas simply looked blank faced.

"Are you sure?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, dude. Wrong chick, wrong hair... It's not her."

It was exhausting getting those words out, and after I finally managed it I felt the control leave me as this girl took over once more. Everything was cold and foggy, as though I was submerged under water. Sleeping sounded great, but I couldn't allow myself to drift off, who knows what might have happened after that.

"Ok, we get the message." Dean said. "How about you hop on our of our sister, huh? We'll fix this. We'll take out your sister, but you don't need to be possessing ours."

I felt my head shake. "I'm sorry, but I can't do that. I have to be certain that she's stopped."

I turned and took off running again, and I don't know if it was because of her that I was so much faster than the boys, or if I was simply in that great of shape- But within seconds we had left them completely behind and the asylum grew smaller in the distance.

I tried yelling at this girl, screaming at her to let me have my own body back, but she wouldn't listen. She was adamant about getting rid of her sister, claiming that she wouldn't stand aside any longer and allow her to kill so many innocent people. By the time I stopped running I was standing in the middle of an enormous cemetery. She moved me through the tombstones until she stopped and eyeballed a small stone crucifix far on the edge below a tall tree.

"There she is." She said.

The rumble of the impalas engine cut through the air, but the girl didn't seem to care as she started for the grave site. I could hear the boys shouting in the distance as they galloped ahead and caught up with me. The only thing she did was point towards the grave and after a quick glance at the name, Sam and Dean started digging.

It was the fastest I'd ever seen them dig up a grave, and during the entire time it took them to do it Cas was standing awkwardly beside me, unsure of what to do.

As soon as the end of the boys shovels hit the wood of the coffin, I could feel myself sigh in relief. They yanked the busted boards off of it, and began to pour salt and gasoline onto the bones. But before either of them could flick a lighter the spirit of the sister suddenly appeared beside of me. She let out a scream and flew at me, shoving me roughly to the point I felt my body soaring through the air and crunch against a tombstone.

Even though I wasn't in control of myself I felt my body ache from the impact. My head was throbbing, and blood dripped down from my temple.

"No!" The girl shrieked. "You ruined everything!"

Cas grabbed a shot gun and blasted the bitch and she disappeared, only to return seconds later and toss Cas across the area. He ended up rolling across the hood of the impala and thumping to the ground beside it.

Finally Sam lit up a matchbook and tossed it into the coffin and I watched with a sick sort of glee as the spirit burst into flames and disappeared. But, it wasn't over. Her damned sister was still possessing me, which Sam and Dean of course wanted to take care of. Before she could force me to run away again Sam grabbed me and Dean forced a handful of salt down my throat. I felt my body contort and convulse before with a whoosh the spirit was basically ejected and went soaring back to its original location. Afterwards I started coughing and would have collapsed had Sam not been holding me.

"Cas?" I called out, noticing him pull himself to his feet. "Are you ok?"

He limped his way over to me and instead of answering grabbed me and pulled me into a hug.

"Yeah, ok ok-" Dean said, patting him on the shoulder. "Break it up, she's fine."

He pulled away and examined the gash on my forehead. "That looks like it will require a stitch or two."

"We'll take care of that at the motel." Sam replied. "But, uh... I think we need to take out that other girl... Just in case."

"Lara's not going." Cas said, his tone was harsh, and that almost never happened. "We're not going to take the chance of this happening again."

"Agreed-" Dean nodded. "We'll drop you two off at the motel."

I guess I didn't get a say in all of this, but actually- I didn't really care right now. I was exhausted, I was starving and thirsty and my head was throbbing. All I wanted to do was eat and sleep for the next three days.


	5. Chapter 5

**_Let the confusion begin lol_**

* * *

Once we were back at the bunker life went on as normally as it usually did. In between jobs I took care of the boys, while Sam and Dean searched for any unusual happenings around the country. We were barely back home for a week before Sam started to fidget uncomfortably and stare at his laptop screen with an expression that could crack glass. Whatever it was he was looking at he wasn't ready to announce yet, but it wouldn't be long before Dean noticed how he was acting and started smacking him.

I tried to get him to eat his dinner by pushing his plate closer but he ignored it.

"Dude..." I muttered. "What's with that face?"

His jaw clenched as he flicked his eyes upwards. "Something, uh... I'm not sure yet."

"Yeah cause that's believable- Seriously, what are you lookin at?"

By now Dean and Cas had noticed our whispering. "What's up?" Dean asked.

"Yeah, well... I was gonna wait a little while and see if I was on to somethin, but yeah.. Ok." He started semi reading, semi winging it. "Lawrence Kansas..." He started and Deans face fell flat. "Some pretty weird things are goin on."

"Such as?"

"Three disappearances in the last week. One, Robert Benson, age 43, was literally standing on the corner of a bus stop surrounded by people when witnesses claim he just poofed away. Gone, just... Gone. Same thing except with 35 year old Andrea Windler, standing in the middle of a grocery store when she vanishes, and last but not least... 22 year old Bobby Grant, vanishes from a public pool. All of the instances has at least ten or more witnesses, all claiming the same thing."

"They just vanished." Dean arched his brows. "Any connections between the vics?"

"One-" Sam sat back and sighed. "They were all convicted and spent time in prison."

"For?" I asked.

"First vic, grand larceny, second breaking and entering, and third, basically same thing. Robbed a gas station-" He sat up. "But, that's not exactly what caught my attention..."

"Yeah cause people just vanishing into thin air isn't suspicious enough-" Dean shrugged. "Nah..."

"Shut up-" Sam turned his laptop around. "The only thing they found left behind at the scenes, something that the witnesses didn't notice, was... Candy wrappers."

Dean went noticeably stiff. "Candy wrappers?"

"Yeah-" Sams brows rose. "And _apparently_, a week before each vic disappeared, they all claimed to have unusual experiences. They said that they woke up in the middle of the night, all in different locations then where they'd gone to sleep. One ended up in the middle of a country road, another ended up suspended upside down by the ankles on a street lamp, the third spinning around circles on a merry go round at the park."

"What the hell..." I furrowed my brows. "What does all that crap mean?"

"Sounds like someone's been playin with some people in Lawrence, messin with their heads and then blipping them into nothingness. Someones version of just desserts." Dean answered, shaking his head. "Gabriel... He must be gettin bored again."

"Gabriel?" Cas leaned forward. "You believe this to be Gabriel?'

"Sounds like him," Sam answered. "I mean, it's always a possibility it isn't... And even if it's not, the three disappearances are fishy enough to check out, right?"

"Man, I really don't feel like dealin with an angel..." Dean groaned. "Especially Gabriel."

"Could be he's trying to get our attention-" Sam shrugged. "I mean, when we're here in the bunker we're invisible to the rest of the world. Gabriel's been hidin out for the last few years, I don't think he would have gotten sloppy like this if it wasn't for a reason."

"Yeah, Sam's right-" I said. "Maybe I haven't seen Gabriel only but once, but from what you've told me about him he's not stupid. Everything he's done in the past was to get your attention, so- Maybe there's something he needs to talk to us about?"

"If that's true-" Cas went on. "I would suggest not summoning him here to the bunker. Even though Gabriel might not necessarily be against us, I wouldn't want to take the risk of him learning about this place."

"So are we going?" I asked. "_Orrr_..."

"We're goin-" Dean stood. "Guess we don't got much choice in the matter now do we? Gabriel's gonna keep up this crap til we show."

"What if it's not Gabriel?" Sam suggested. "What if it's some other dick angel that's only _pretending _to be Gabriel to get us to come running?"

"Then we'll gank that mother too-" Sure Dean made it sound so simple. "Gabriel or not, someone's screwin with the people in Lawrence, so... We gotta take care of it."

Now I pushed away from the table with a groan. "We didn't get much of a break this time between jobs. So, whatever Gabriel wants better be worth it."

* * *

I could smell the coffee brewing and just as I did every morning I awoke before the alarm could go off. Mornings were my favorite time of day after all, and I would try my best to relish the sunshine and peacefulness as long as possible.

Rolling over, I could see the beams of sun peaking through the curtains hanging on my bedroom window, as well as the trees in the backyard swaying in the breeze. Yeah, it was a nice morning and hopefully would be a nice day.

I rolled out of bed and didn't bother with my slippers and robes and instead hobbled my way to the kitchen, pausing momentarily to scratch the ears of my golden lab. He always slept at the end of my bed and was the most well behaved dog I'd ever seen. He wandered up on my doorstep a year prior and I hadn't the heart to take him to a shelter. Just as always he followed me to the kitchen and flopped his lazy self down in front of the cabinet.

"What's for breakfast huh, Gabby?" I asked, and heard the thumping of his tail against the hard wood. "I know what you want, you want pie- But you're a dog and can't have that."

He let out a snort of disappointment. Sometimes I wondered if the dog could actually understand everything I said- He certainly acted as though he could.

I sifted through the fridge and pulled out the ingredients to make pancakes- And after a quick glance at the clock, noticing it almost 8:30, I got to cooking. Dean would always show up around this time for breakfast, just as he had done ever since I moved out and got my own place. With Sammy living in the next town over and busy with his law practice, he didn't get to see much of his little brother so instead would come and torment me everyday. I didn't mind, after all, why would I? He was my oldest brother, and our entire life growing up we had been close.

Like clockwork I heard him pounding on my front door which of course sent Gabby running to snort out the living room window. He never barked, in fact, he was the worlds most pathetic watch dog- But Lawrence Kansas wasn't exactly swarming with crime, so I suppose it didn't matter.

And, I wasn't sure why Dean bothered to knock. He had a key to my place, so when I heard the door creak open I peaked around the kitchen door.

"Hey." I called out, noticing Dean throw his jacket over the back of my sofa.

"Mornin, kid." He said, moving to sit at the counter to watch me flip pancakes. "You making bacon?"

"Duh-" I snickered. "When do I not?"

Gabby swarmed around him like a buzzing insect and I saw Dean cringe.

"Dude... Leave me the hell alone, I don't have any candy-" He glared at me. "Lara, what's up with your damn dog anyways?"

"Nothing? You wanna explain to me why you hate him so much? He's so cute, look at that face."

"He's a friggin beggar, and he smells."

"You smell." I retorted sarcastically, and handed him his plate of food. "So whatcha up to today?"

"Got the day off from the garage-" He shrugged. "Thought maybe you'd wanna do something."

"Uhh, well I have to write that article by the end of today, but it's a short one so it won't take too much time. I actually needed to run some errands."

"Wanna ride?"

"Might as well- My car has been thunking lately, I thought you were gonna fix it?"

He stuffed his mouth full and smirked. "Your car's a piece of crap, I hate dealing with it."

"It was a gift from Dad when I was sixteen, you really think I'm gonna get rid of it?"

He ignored that question. "I talked to Sam this morning- He said he's coming for a visit tomorrow... For dinner or something, I dunno. Mom's planning something."

"Planning what?" I glanced at the calender hanging on my fridge door. "It's no bodies birthday, not Mom and Dads anniversary, what's going on?"

He shrugged. "Got no clue, but it's tomorrow at 7, be on time. Oh, and Mom wanted me to tell you that it would be cool if you brought a date."

Now he sneered at me which only made me scowl. "Ya know. I'm only 25, why is it such a big deal that I'm not married or engaged?"

"Cause she wants grand kids already."

"Like I'm the only one capable of giving her that." I rose my brows at him. "Why haven't you and Vicki had a kid yet, huh?"

"Don't rush me." Dean gobbled up the rest of his pancakes and slid off the chair. "If you want me to drive you somewhere then go get ready."

"By the way-" I said before returning to my room. "You're not wearing your wedding band again. Vicki is going to kill you."

"Ah crap," He stared down at his naked ring finger. "I left it in our garage again."

Just as always, one of these days he was going to lose the thing and then Vicki would divorce him.

After getting dressed and grabbing my purse and jacket I followed Dean outside and to his impala. Sometimes I wondered how his wife didn't get pissed at him for leaving the house so early and hanging out with me. But, I guess I would be stupid not to say that they weren't exactly getting along lately.

"So where to, cupcake?" Dean said.

"Uhh... I need to stop at the coffee shop first of all. My coffee just tastes like crap I don't know why I bother to make it."

"Awesome. They have _the _best pie at that place." He cranked the car in reverse and backed out of the drive.

Lawrence was never busy this early in the morning, so we didn't have to battle traffic or a line inside the coffee shop. Dean pushed ahead of me however and immediately started gawking at the pie in the display case. I stared up at the menu and didn't really pay any mind to the guy behind the counter until I heard him clear his throat.

For the first time in my life I did a double take, and for a short instant I could have swore I knew this guy. There was something very familiar about his squinty blue eyes and emotionless expression. But, as soon as that feeling was there, it was gone again and I quickly shook it off.

"Can I help you?" He asked, and Dean stood from the pie case and gave him the same perturbed look I had.

"Whoa, deja vu." He muttered quietly.

"Pardon me?" The man, whose name tag clearly read "Cas" said.

Odd name for a dude, I thought. Unless it was short for something like Casper, then I could understand.

"Nothin, dude-" Dean rubbed the back of his head awkwardly. "You just looked familiar for a second... Anyways, I'll take a slice of apple pie."

His eyes shifted to me. "And you?"

"Uh..." I couldn't find my voice for some odd reason. "A cup of breakfast blend, extra cream."

Dean and I both watched him as he moved behind the counter, and it seemed this guy looked just as confused as the both of us clearly felt. Something suddenly didn't feel right about this situation, and I wasn't sure why.

Dean paid for my coffee since apparently my brain had stopped working and I only took the coffee from him and stared awkwardly.

"Dude..." Dean nudged me. "Let's get a table."

I mumbled something incoherent as I followed him to a table and took a seat. I had no desire to drink the coffee now, because my stomach was rolling.

"What's your problem?" He asked, apparently he didn't seem to have any issues as he gobbled up his pie.

"I don't know... Like you said earlier... Deja vu."

"You too?" He glanced over his shoulder as Cas wiped down the counter. "That's weird."

"No kidding."

We went silent as the tv in the corner switched over to a news broadcast of several bodies found in the woods. According to what they said, each victims throat had been torn out and they were completely drained of blood.

"Maybe it was vampires." Dean and I both said in unison, then we glared at each other blank faced.

"Uh, why did we say that?" I asked.

"Good question... Too many kissing vampire movies, maybe?"

No, that wasn't it... And he didn't think so either, I could tell by the look on his face. I tried to force the eerie feelings away by sipping at my coffee, but I just couldn't keep myself from casually glancing behind the counter where this new guy stood. I came into this place every damn day, sometimes more than once and never before had I ever seen him. Maybe today was his first day?

I suddenly had the want to talk to him again, but I couldn't do it with my stupid brother sitting right there. He would think I was trying to hit on the guy, which actually wasn't a bad thought, he was pretty damned cute- But that wasn't what I was doing. I knew this nagging feeling in my gut wouldn't go away until I settled that he had never worked in this place before today. Don't ask me why, but I just needed to know.

"You done?" Dean asked, after practically licking his plate clean.

"Uh, yeah. You can go on out, I'm just gonna make a pit stop to the ladies room."

"Got it."

I watched him go before grabbing my purse and heading over to the counter. Now, how would I go about this? You don't just ask a random stranger personal questions, unless you were a skeevy perv that is, which I clearly wasn't. Plus, I didn't want him to get the wrong idea. When I saw the depressingly empty tip jar, I figured that was reason enough to walk up there. I grabbed a random bill from my wallet, not even bothering to look at the amount and stuffed it in there.

He didn't really pay much attention to the money jar, and instead just gawked at me with scrunched brows.

"So..." I started, feeling my nerves welling to my fingertips. "I've never seen you here before, is this your first day?"

He cocked his head to the side slightly, and just seeing that action almost made me chuckle. Don't ask me why.

"No." He answered, shaking his head. "I've been employed here for three years."

My face fell flat. "Three years? That can't be possible."

"Why?" His eyes squinted even more than they were already.

"Uh, well. It's just weird. I come in here everyday, and I've never seen you before."

"Strange..." He tapped his fingertip to his chin. "I've never seen you either, and I'm here from morning until closing, everyday."

We both stared at each other intently. He could have been lying, but why would he?

"Have we met?" He suddenly asked. "Your face seems very familiar."

"Not that I know of... I think I would remember you." I heard Dean honking from the car out front. "Uh, sorry. I have to go."

"Wait..." He surprised me by reaching over the counter and grabbing my hand. "What's your name? If I can ask..."

I gave half a smile. "Lara, and I see by your name tag that yours is Cas."

He barely glanced down to his tag and nodded. "Yes, apparently I'm Cas."

He either had a very odd sense of humor or he was just that unusual- Either way, he realized he was still clenching my hand and quickly pulled away.

"Well-" I said, fidgeting. "Nice to meet you, seeya later."

I gave a little wave and quickly left the coffee shop. That was the strangest experience I had ever had, and I wasn't sure why.


	6. Chapter 6

I was in a daze the remainder of the day, and by the time sundown came I remembered that I didn't have anything as far as food goes in my house. Sam was coming to visit the next day, which meant that I needed to stock up on salads and protein bars. So after a quick drive to the grocery store I lugged my bags out to my car, which Dean had still forgotten to fix, and shoved them in the trunk.

The parking lot was pretty much abandoned by that time, and the one lonely light above my car didn't provide much comfort. I shuddered slightly as I turned away from my trunk and started for the drivers side door. I was just reaching for the handle when I felt someone grab me from behind.

Instantly a scream escaped my throat as I was swung around and some random guy with long shaggy dark hair grabbed at my purse. Yeah I know you're supposed to just surrender your belongings when a mugger was attacking you, but when you're shoved into a situation like that first instincts are to struggle and fight back. Which is what I tried to do, but I wasn't much of a fighter obviously and ended up getting knocked backwards into my car as I slumped to the ground. Out of no where a second body tackled the mugger and they both fell to the ground. Whoever it was started punching him over and over in the face before the thief eventually managed to break free and run away.

I pulled myself back to my feet and finally realized it was the weird coffee shop guy that was my rescuer.

"Cas?" I asked, confused.

He turned towards me and was cradling his right hand. "Are you hurt?"

I shook my head. "N-No... Thanks for that, I... I guess I panicked." I needed to slap myself, but quickly shook it off. "Are you ok?"

He cringed slightly and tried to hide his hand. "I'm fine."

"No, you're not." I sighed and stepped forward and held his hand up to the light. "Yeah, you busted up your knuckles pretty good popping that asshole in the face like that. You need to put some ice on that or it's gonna swell up." He only looked at me with the same confused baby face as before, and I smirked. "Ok, well. You saved my butt so I guess I owe you one, huh? Listen, why don't you come back home with me and I'll ice up your hand and buy you a beer."

His brows scrunched. "Are you sure?"

"Please, after what you did I don't think giving you a beer is too much trouble. Besides-" I eyed him closely. "You look harmless enough, so I don't think you'll kill me."

Now his eyes widened slightly. "No, I can promise that I won't kill you."

I couldn't help but snicker as I motioned towards the car. "K, well- Hop on in then."

He nodded and climbed in the passenger seat and I started back towards my house. Honestly, the thought of even calling the cops after that incident didn't even cross my mind- Which normally, so I figured, would be the routine after almost being mugged. But today had been an unusual day, and it only seemed to be getting even more strange.

Cas didn't speak much on the drive back to my house, but it took less than five minutes to pull into the drive so once I cut the engine I led the way up my front porch stairs.

"This is your house?" He asked. "It seems rather large for one person."

"Yeah..." I shrugged as I shoved the key in the lock. "But it was cheap, where do you live?"

"I... Well, it's an apartment above the coffee shop."

I pushed the door open and Gabby was there to greet us. Cas seemed slightly alarmed at such a large dog sniffing him but after a thorough inspection he returned to his dog bed.

After flicking on the lights in the living room and then the kitchen I motioned towards the kitchen table.

"Take a seat, I'll get you an icepack."

"Thank you." He said meekly, then sat down.

I rummaged through the freezer and grabbed an icepack then a dish towel, finishing with a beer from the fridge and sat down beside him. Only then did I notice that he must have gotten walloped in the face because he had a cut on his cheek bone.

"Oh crap." I said, reaching up and taking a look. "Guess I'll get a first aid kit too."

I grabbed it from the bathroom and cleaned the cut with some antiseptic. For some odd reason this seemed strangely familiar. I could almost see myself in the past cleaning up his wounds, but of course that was ridiculous. Up until today I had never met this man.

"So..." I tried to make some kind of conversation because he clearly didn't know how. "Have you lived in Lawrence all your life?"

He shook his head slightly, then cringed as I dabbed some antibiotic on the cut. "No. It's only been for the last three years. How about yourself?"

"Yeah, I grew up here." I glanced down noticing the wedding band on his hand. "So, you're married?"

"No-" He scrunched his brows. "Why would you ask that?"

"Wedding band, dude." I pointed to his finger. "Kind of a tell tale sign."

"Oh..." His eyes fell downwards towards the ring. "Well I'm not married. I really don't understand why I wear that ring."

"Alrighty-" I rolled my eyes slightly. "So, got any family here in town?"

"No. I'm alone."

"I see. Well, my entire family lives here, well all but my middle brother. He lives in the next town over."

"You have siblings? Was the man you were with earlier this morning one of them?"

"Yeah, that's my oldest brother. His name is Dean."

"Interesting... I could have swore I had met him before."

I nodded. "Yeah, funny thing is, we thought the same thing about you. I guess you just have one of those faces."

"What faces?" He cocked his head slightly and I stifled back a laugh.

"Ya know... I guess the type that's... Familiar?"

"Oh... Of course."

Could someone really be so clueless? In a way it was actually kind of cute. Maybe he had a very sheltered childhood or something, or had previously been living under a rock. I didn't know.

"So what about you... Do you have any siblings?" I asked.

That question seemed to make him uncomfortable as he had gone noticeably stiff.

"Not anymore." He answered finally.

"Oh..." I just had to go and ask a personal question that was a touchy subject. I assumed that they had passed away or maybe they had a falling out, so I quickly changed the subject. "How's your hand doing?"

He brought it out from under the icepack and wiggled his fingers. "It feels better, thank you."

"You're lucky you didn't break any bones. I swear, dude- I've never seen anyone beat the crap out of someones face like you did."

"I lost my temper I suppose. Generally I maintain a level of calm. But I noticed the altercation from across the parking lot and knew I had to do something. It is rather strange though- It's the first time I've ever put myself in harms way for someone else."

I couldn't help but smile. "Well, thank you. Really, I appreciate it."

He gave a small smile in return.

I sat back and took a glance at the clock on the wall. "It's pretty late, if I'm keeping you from something let me know and I can drive you back into town."

He barely looked at the clock before sighing. "Yes, I suppose it is late. Although you're not keeping me from anything."

I wondered if that was his way of saying he didn't want to leave. Honestly, I didn't want him to go either. It was calming and peaceful in his presence, for some odd reason- And I didn't come across someone I could talk to so easily very often. Other than my brothers, but that didn't count.

"So, what can you tell me about yourself?" I asked, deciding against driving him back. "All I know so far is that your name is Cas, you work at the coffee shop, and have lived here three years."

"And all I know of you is that your name is Lara and you have two brothers." He counteracted.

"Is that your way of saying you don't want to tell me anything about yourself?" I chuckled.

"No-" He shook his head. "I'm afraid I'm just not that interesting."

"Can't be any more boring than me. I'm a high school graduate, I write articles for a womens magazine, and that's basically it."

He scrunched his brows at that, examining me closely. "That doesn't seem to fit your personality. If I were to guess, you would do something much different."

"Like?"

He shrugged. "I'm not certain. But it just seems that way."

"Hm... Well, Cas... You seem a tad bit mysterious in your own way. Especially since I've never seen you before in my life, and you claim to have worked at my favorite coffee shop for years. I really don't know how I've never seen you before." I leaned forward. "Plus, I just get the eerie feeling that we do know each other... Which is odd, because like I said, I've never seen you before."

We only stared at each other for what felt like minutes on end as a tension seemed to fill the area. He shifted slightly in the chair before clearing his throat nervously and standing.

"I suppose I should go-" He said, although his body language clearly said differently. "I don't want to keep you up too late."

I nodded and stood as well. "Do you want me to drive you back?"

"No, that would inconvenience you. It's not far, I can walk."

Yeah I was disappointed, but I couldn't exactly tie him to a chair- So I escorted him to the door and pulled it open.

"Well, thank you again for what you did tonight, Cas." I said again.

He said nothing, and only stared outside at the front porch. I raised a brow, waiting for him to say something but he didn't.

In a limit of practically three seconds he suddenly reached up and slammed the door closed, grabbed me, pushed me against it and kissed me. I wasn't even surprised by the action, it felt as normal and natural as breathing to me. Although I'm not sure how, I had just met this guy... But, apparently that didn't seem to matter because articles of clothing eventually got tossed to the floor and I quickly pulled him to my bedroom and slammed the door.

* * *

My eyes groggily opened as a beam of sun swept across my face, I was exhausted. More exhausted then I'd been in ages, and the only thing I wanted to do was go back to sleep. The events of the night before came rushing back in one quick sweep, and for a moment I was actually surprised that I had lost control like that. It had never happened, I definitely was not the type of person that would sleep with some guy I had only known less than an hour. No, no way- This was definitely a first, I mean... My god, I didn't know anything about this guy.

I should probably learn his last name, was my first thoughts...

I halfway expected for Cas to be gone, but when I shifted my head on my pillow I was surprised to see him still there lying next to me. Not sure how I didn't notice before, seeing is that his arm was draped over my chest, and his hand was resting on my shoulder.

This was... Awkward... Awkward because normally I figured that I would be cursing myself and feeling shame for the way I had acted the night before- But actually, it was the complete opposite. For the first time in a long time the empty spot I always felt was gone. Which of course was completely stupid to allow myself to feel that way. For all I knew Cas would wake up, throw on his clothes and leave and I would never speak to him again. Generally one night stand guys don't call you again, at least that's what I've always heard. And I'm going by the many conversations I had with my oldest brother before he settled down and got married. There was a long list of angry scorned women that he'd slept with and never called again.

So I decided to do myself a favor and get this over with as soon as possible. If he was gonna dance his way out of my life after one night, then I would get over it. I wasn't going to allow myself to become attached.

I was going to try and sneak my way out of bed, but when my alarm suddenly started buzzing I reached over quickly and smacked the button down. When I glanced back warily at him his eyes were open and peering straight at me.

"Um... Morning." I muttered.

He swallowed once over before nodding. "Good morning."

Questions... I had so many questions. Like why exactly did this feel so damned familiar? It was as though I was getting flashes of memories that had never happened and in each one he was there, staring at me with those baby blues- Completely peaceful and serene. Oh my god this was so incredibly wrong.

"I think I'll go make some breakfast." I said, forcing myself to sit up which caused his arm to fall away. "Are you hungry?"

He sat up as well and nodded. "I suppose, slightly. But I don't want to inconvenience you."

God damn he was polite, seriously how does a dude get to be that way?

"It's ok." I reached for my robe and threw it on. "If you want to take a shower, it's right there-" I pointed to the door in the corner.

He didn't say anything and I quickly fled the room. When I opened the door Gabby was lying in the hallway waiting for me.

"Oh, crap." I said, scratching the top of his head. "I'm sorry, I completely forgot about you."

He followed me to the kitchen where the backdoor was and I let him outside, then started making coffee and trying not to fidget out of my bathrobe. I could hear the shower crank on past my bedroom, and for a moment I let out a relieved sigh. For the moment I wouldn't have to try to explain to this guy why I was acting like such a nut job. Because, really... I had no idea why I was.

I was so busy with banging pots and pans around that I didn't even hear my front door creak open until suddenly there was a "Morning."

Swinging around, my eyes went wide at seeing Sam and Dean.

"Whoa." Sam said, snickering. "Looks like you forgot I was coming, huh?"

"Urrr." I mumbled. "Yeah, sorry I guess I did."

He rushed over and gave me a tight hug, lifting me practically two feet off the ground.

"You look good, kiddo. When are you gonna come visit me?"

Dean walked over and leaned against the counter. "You know you left the shower running, right?" He asked, then glanced down to the array of clothing scattered around the floor. "Wait a second... Whose pants are those?" When I went stiff and silent his eyes widened. "Whoa, whoa whoa... _Whoa_-" He raised his hands. "Is there a dude in your shower?"

Sam arched a brow. "Wow, Dean- Your power of observation amazes me sometimes."

"Guys..." I rubbed my head. "Please don't make a big deal out of this."

"What the hell?!" Dean shrieked. "Who is this yahoo? Is it someone that I know. Oh god..." He looked sick. "Please don't tell me its Craig from the garage? It's Craig from the garage isn't it?"

"Craig?" My eyes widened. "You mean the over forty guy with three missing teeth? Thanks, Dean- I'm glad you think my standards aren't too high."

"Then who the hell is it? I gotta know the guy, I know everyone in this friggin town."

Sam sighed. "Dean, there's over eighty thousand people in Lawrence, you don't know everyone."

"Well, ok- Everyone in the general vicinity then... Who is it?"

The shower suddenly turned off and I heard the door open as Cas stepped out into the hallway with only a towel around his waist.

"Lara, I seem to have misplaced my pants..." He said, barely passing a glance to Sam and Dean, but muttered. "Oh... Hello."

Deans face went ashen and Sam only arched his brows.

"So..." I grabbed his pants and tossed them to him. "These are my brothers, Sam and Dean."

"Uh, Hi." Sam said, waving awkwardly.

"It's nice to meet you..." Cas moved his eyes to me. "I'm suddenly aware that I'm unclothed, if you'll excuse me."

He walked back into the bedroom and closed the door and I counted down from ten because I knew Dean was going to blow. I got to three before he spat.

"Him?!" He pointed at the closed bedroom door. "That... That weird coffee shop guy? I knew it. I knew you were eyeballing him yesterday, Lara- Seriously?"

"Shh!" I waved my hands at him. "Would you lower your voice already? Calm the eff down, what's the big deal?"

"Big deal?" He looked about ready to puke. "You knew him for what, five friggin minutes?!"

"Look, you don't understand. He literally saved my ass last night. From a mugger."

Sam gave an "ah ha" face while Dean still wasn't impressed.

"Ok, so-" Dean went on. "He saved your ass last night, and in turn you _give _him your ass as what... A parting gift?"

"Dean-" Sam shook his head. "Calm down. Lara is perfectly capable of making horrible choices that will completely ruin her life. It's none of our business."

"Gee, thanks." I scowled. "He happens to be a very nice guy."

"Yeah cause you were able to make conversation during the five seconds it took to rip his pants off." Dean rolled his eyes.

Cas stepped out of the bedroom fully clothed, all but his shoes which were lying near the front door. Everyone immediately went silent as he awkwardly walked his way from the hallway.

"I, uh-" He paused when he noticed Dean giving him death stares. "I think I should probably go, Lara."

I nodded and pushed past my brothers and escorted him to the door. He grabbed his shoes and we stepped out onto the porch and I closed the door behind me.

"I'm sorry about them-" I said, motioning over my shoulder. "They're kind of asses sometimes."

He nodded and smiled slightly. "It's fine, but I..." Yet again he paused as his brows furrowed and he stared at the living room window. "Lara. Your brother Dean seems to want to harm me somehow."

I turned and noticed Dean standing at the window, and Cas was right, that was definitely his "I'm going to hurt you" face. He then pointed to his eyes, then at Cas' and turned away slowly.

"Oh my god." I took my face in my hands. "I'm sorry, he's... Well he's a moron. Just ignore him."

"It's fine, really. I suppose I can understand his frustrations. Older brothers have a tendency to be protective of their youngest siblings. Especially if it's a female." He took a step closer. "Will I see you again, Lara?"

I'm sure he could see the surprise on my face. "You want to?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"Uh... Well I don't know. I thought maybe..." I rose my hands. "Never mind, do you have a cell?"

He felt through his pockets before pulling his phone out. I took it and punched in my number, saving it to contacts. Ok, there was definitely something strange about this guy. He had zero contacts on his phone, and no texts what so ever.

"Ok, you have my number now." I said, handing his phone back to him. "Use it."

He nodded and slipped it back into his pocket, and I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him. It felt like ripping out my own fingernails when I finally pulled away, for some odd reason it was just that painful. He kept his hands positioned on the lower part of my back, and wasn't able it seemed to open his eyes.

"Wow..." I muttered. "What is it about you, huh?"

He swallowed a few times over and shook his head. "I was wondering the same thing about you."

Our moment was interrupted when a loud booming truck sped by.

"Well... I suppose I should go now. If you don't mind, perhaps I can call you later?" He said.

"I don't mind... Oh-" I let out an annoyed sigh. "I forgot, I'm supposed to have dinner with my parents tonight, so- I might be home late, you can call then if you want."

He nodded. "Thank you, Lara..." He fidgeted. "Goodbye."

I waved him off and watched him descend the stairs and disappear down the sidewalk. Afterwards I waited a good few minutes before returning inside and immediately getting glared at by Dean.

"You're... I..." He shook his head. "Sammy, a little help here- I don't know what to think of this."

"Just shut up, Dean-" I grumbled, moving back into the kitchen. "So, are we all still on for dinner tonight?"

"Yeah-" Sam smiled, thankful that the subject had been changed. "At 7 still. Any idea on why Mom's so eager to have this shindig?"

"Shindig?" Dean rolled his eyes. "I think she just wants all her kids under one damned roof for a change. It's been over a year since it's happened. Hell, Sammy- You don't show up for Christmas, or Thanksgiving, comon..."

"I'm sorry, Dean- It's not like I like it..." Sam trailed off and gave me an eye roll. "I don't need a lecture, ok?"

Dean glanced at his watch. "Crap, I forgot to pick up somethin for Vicki- I'll be back in ten minutes."

He grumbled his way out the door and once he was gone I poured Sam a cup of coffee. "Ok, so... Spill it." I said.

"Spill what?"

"Something's up with you, I can tell. I can always tell- Those puppy eyes of yours practically scream at anyone who's looking close enough. What's on your mind?"

He tapped his fingers on the coffee cup and sighed. "I got a job offer, a partnership... In Boston."

"Boston?" No, ok I wasn't thrilled with him moving clear across the country, but... "Well, that's good... Isn't it?"

"I dunno-" He took a sip of coffee. "Lara, do you ever get the feeling that you're supposed to be doing something different with your life?"

I sat across from him on a bar stool. "Actually... Up until yesterday, no... I dunno, yesterday was weird. I suddenly felt like everything in my life was wrong, or that maybe something was missing."

"Is that why you slept with that guy?"

My face went red. "No, that I really have no explanation for. But anyways, if you think you should be doing something else, what would it be?"

"I really don't know-" He sat back and shook his head. "But I just don't think being a divorce attorney is cutting it anymore, kiddo." His brows scrunched. "And, well I know this might sound weird but, uh... Before I drove here I stopped by my office to check up on a few things... All of my contacts, my clients, their names had completely vanished from my files. It was as though they never even existed."

"Maybe you had a virus on your computer?"

"I thought so too, but... Wanna hear something really strange?" I nodded. "I checked the nameplate on my desk, it was for some guy name Bob Richards... All of my family photos on my desk were gone, and when the secretary out front saw me, she acted like she didn't even recognize me and threatened to call the cops... Seriously, what the hell is happening?"

For a second I was actually going to accuse him of fucking with my head, until I saw the expression on his face. Sammy was the serious sibling, not the one that would pull childish pranks or make up crazy stories just to tick someone off, no he was being completely truthful right now.

"Uh..." I blabbered. "I have no explanation for that, Sam... Really... But, ya know the guy that was here, of course you know how could you have forgotten already, but- Dean and I both had the weirdest feeling of deja vu yesterday when we first saw him- And it just felt like I knew him, ya know... I can't explain it."

"Anything else strange goin on, kiddo? Cause I feel like I'm losing my mind. It's as though my entire life has been nothing but a figment of my imagination."

I shrugged. "I just woke up, so no... But I can say with a certainty that something doesn't feel right."

He nodded and continued to tap his fingers on his coffee cup. Yeah, Sam was definitely on edge, he was never his nervous.

"Well, maybe I just need to take a nice long vacation... Not take that stupid job offer in Boston... Maybe I'll move back to Lawrence." He said.

"Really?" Now I perked up. "What would you do?"

"I don't know, and really- Right at this second I honestly don't care. I just... I dunno, uh... I can't explain it."

Yeah, neither could I...

"What about Dean?" I asked now. "Has he said anything..."

"Yeah-" He shifted slightly and stared at the door as though Dean might waltz back through. "He told me not to tell you, but... Vicki... Gone, just, gone... No photos left behind, her clothes, everything... Just vanished, like she never even existed."

"What the..." I practically fell off my bar stool. "Ok, so- Either Vicki finally got fed up with Dean and left his ass, or..."

"Or something really fucked up is happening around here." Sam finished.

This was giving me the chills and I was halfway convinced that I was dreaming. My trance broke when Sam got a text from Dean saying that he was on his way back and they were gonna go grab something to eat. They invited me, but there was no way I was stepping out of my friggin house now- Besides, I had shit to do. Like trying to see what sort of things in _my_ life happened to completely vanish from the face of the earth.

After Sam left I locked the door behind him and immediately grabbed my laptop. The day went by in what felt like a matter of minutes and by the time 7 came around, which was supposed to be when we would go to dinner with our parents- I had come to find out that this womens magazine that I wrote for, frickin went bankrupt seven years ago, the high school I supposedly graduated from? Never existed... Friends, people, acquaintances that I'd known for years had either been dead for longer, never existed, or when I would dial their number would receive something random like a bakery, a gas station, or simply a disconnected number.

By the time this "dinner" we were _supposed _to be having came and went, I glanced at the clock long enough to see that it was 11:30, and the entire day had gone by and basically everything in my life was a lie.

The final straw was searching for my parents, and noticing that Mary Winchester had died in 1983, and John Winchester had gone missing shortly after and was pretty much never heard from again. Never mind the fact that they only had 2, count em, 2 kids... Boys, with no mention what so ever of a friggin daughter.

My heart was pounding in my ears, I felt sick... How in the world could something like this happen?

Well, our parents being dead I suppose explained how and why no one seemed to care about missing dinner. Actually, Mary wasn't even my real mother... So, no... Seriously, what the fuck was happening?!

When my cell start buzzing from the coffee table I practically jumped out of my skin, and with shaky hands I grabbed it and didn't recognize the number.

"Yeah, hello?" I answered.

"Lara?" It was Cas, his voice was pretty recognizable. "You said it would be alright if I called?"

"Yeah, uh... Cas, where are you?"

"I'm..." He paused and I could clearly hear his footsteps against pavement. "I'm just taking a walk."

"Can you come over here? I need to talk to you about something?"

"Of course."

He hung up and for a second I stared at the phone in my hand with a frown before the doorbell rang.

Wait a second... That couldn't have been him already? It was literally three seconds that I just spoke to him. I moved to the door anyhow and pulled it open, and of course it was him.

"Uh, were you waiting outside my house?" I asked.

His eyes shifted slightly before he nodded. "I was... Just passing by."

"Sure you were-" I grabbed him by the arm and yanked him inside. "Sit down, I need to make a quick call, ok?"

He nodded and sat down on the sofa and I dialed Deans number. It rang once and he quickly picked up.

"Yeah, Lara." Already I could tell by his tone that he was freaked.

"Dude, is Sam with you?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"Get your asses over to my house, now! And be quick about it."

I hung up and started nervously pacing, while Gabby and Cas observed me in confusion.

"Lara, is something wrong?" Cas asked.

"Uh, yeah. Something is definitely wrong- But we're waiting until Sam and Dean get here to discuss it."

He went silent and continued to watch me pace. When I heard the rumble of the impalas engine pull into the drive I halfway wanted to cry in relief. Just my luck, I figured, both my brothers would suddenly vanish from my life and would have never existed.

I pulled the door open before Dean could knock and motioned them both inside.

"Sit down, guys." I said, pointing to the sofa.

All three men exchanged odd glances before Sam and Dean sat and I finally tried to spit everything out.

"Ok, so, really. What the hell is going on around here?" I said. "Sam, what you told me earlier, I decided to do a little digging myself and come to find out-" I shook my head. "Everything that I remember, everyone I knew... Is gone. My entire life is nothing but a lie... It never happened."

I expected my brothers to lecture me but instead they fell silent until Dean cleared his throat.

"Yeah, uh-" He started. "We kinda noticed the same thing... Mom and Dad... They're gone."

"No shit!" I retorted. "And, Mary Winchester wasn't even my real mother, she died eight years before I was even born!"

Sam didn't seem to like being sandwiched between Dean and Cas and moved to the ottoman.

"Uh, Lara-" He motioned towards Cas. "I don't wanna, ya know, cause a scene or anything but... Why exactly is he here for this?"

"He's a part of this, and do you know why?" Both brothers shook their head and poor Cas only sat there blank faced. "Because other than the two of you, he's the only thing that feels familiar. Dean, you said it yourself yesterday that you had a deja vu moment."

"Well, yeah, but..."

"No buts-" I interrupted. "I saw the way you looked at him yesterday in the coffee house. You recognized him."

He pursed his lips but didn't deny the accusation. Cas finally shifted slightly before he finally said something.

"I didn't want to mention it, Lara- But this morning I somehow knew Sams face, as though I had met him before. Of course I felt that was preposterous, but now that you've mentioned so many strange things... Up until three years ago when I moved to Lawrence, I have no recollection of my life before hand. It's as though it's a completely blank space in my mind."

I sat down on my armchair. "Seriously... What is going on here guys?"

"I wish I knew-" Sam shook his head. "I mean, how is it possible that everything we've known and remember is nothing but a lie? Wouldn't it take, uh, I don't know, _God_ to accomplish something like that?"

"Cas..." Dean said. "Just wonderin, but... What is Cas short for?"

"Castiel-" Sam answered before Cas could. "Wait a second... How did I know that?"

We went silent and only stared at each other in shock before a voice rang out from the opposite side of the room, just near Gabbys dog bed.

"Ook, I can pick up a cue-" A man said, suddenly appearing on the pillow.

All four of us jumped to our feet, and I frantically searched around the house for my damn dog.

"Who the hell are you?!" I shrieked.

He smiled, and stood. "Calm down, just give me a second." He then snapped his fingers.

Like a damn broke in my mind suddenly I was overwhelmed with memories, a life and existence that finally began to overpower and smother out this fictionalized land I was standing in. Once I was done clenching my head I glanced up to see my brothers and Cas as well were going through the same thing. For a moment I stared around this house, this unknown space, in confusion before Cas looked over to the corner and stood up straight.

"Gabriel?" He said.

"Hey, bro!" Gabriel said, waltzing his way out of the corner. "Sheesh you guys, it took you long enough."

"What the hell is this, Gabriel?" Dean snapped. "What sorta mind fuck have you been playin on us?"

Gabriel chuckled and shrugged. "Let's just say I was putting all of you through a little test... If it makes you feel any better, you all passed with flying colors!"

"A test?" Sam cringed. "What sort of fucked up test was this supposed to be? Just how long have we been here like this?"

Gabriel moved to stand in the middle of the living room. "Only a couple weeks, don't worry- It hasn't been that long."

"Gabriel-" Cas took a step forward. "Why have you done this? What is this test?"

"This!" He said, pointing to each of us. "This was the test, you, all of you, together- Workin through things, coming together... It goes to show that no matter what happens and what situations you're thrust in to-" He smiled and crossed his arms. "This is the way it always ends up, you guys are all attached at the damn hips or something and always end up workin together. I wanted to make sure that I was right... And I was..."

"Wait a second-" I held up a finger. "Why exactly do you give two craps if we're all working together?"

"Because you morons have _no_ idea what's coming... And in order for everything to work out, you _need _to stick together. No getting into pissy girl fights and running off-" He looked to Cas. "No getting it into your head that runnin off is better than staying. In order for all of you to survive- You have to stay together."

"Hold it-" Dean stomped forward. "Just what the hell is gonna go down now? What's gonna happen?"

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that. It's sorta gotta play out on it's own, ass-hat."

"But you know?" Sam asked. "You know everything?"

"Oh yeah... Gotta say, I've been waitin a long ass time for this. And, it's starting... In fact, it started, oh... Last night, I guess?"

"And you can't even give us a hint?" I asked.

He smirked at me. "Well, since you asked so nicely..." He shook his head. "_No_."

I suddenly felt like shoving my fist in his face. "Seriously? You drag us into this fun land and won't even tell us why?"

"I did tell you why!" He moved closer. "Look, dudes- I'm doin what I gotta do right now, believe me not everyone is as happy about what's gonna happen as I am. You should be thankful that I'm on your side! I'm routing for you guys, just like I always have been."

"Right-" Sam sneered. "In your round about way you think you're helping us out, when actually all you're doing is fucking with us for your own entertainment."

"Hey if I was doing this for fun I wouldn't have made it so obvious that everything in this joint was complete bull crap. I would have dragged it out longer than two weeks." His smile faded and he tried to give a compassionate stare. "Guys... Really, I sympathize with you, I do. Let's face it your lives have been a great big ball of crap since the moment you were tossed into all of this." He sighed and shook his head. "Ok, you wore me down. I'll give you a little hint... All I can say is that what's coming in the future for all of you, is something that _none_ of you have ever faced- Well, except for the fate of the world lying in your hands, thing- _That _you're familiar with, but... It doesn't have to be a bad thing, guys... Really. Try to think of this as more of a... Well, why spoil the surprise, right?"

Castiel shook his head. "Gabriel, if there is a chance that they could be in danger, don't you agree that it would be best to warn us of it?"

"You know the rules, bro- Can't go giving away the ending of the story just as the beginning has started, that spoils the whole movie." He clapped his hands together. "Ok, well this has been fun, but I guess I'll ship you back now. And remember, you better take my advice with this one... Stay together or you're all royally boned." He glared at Dean. "Since you're too stupid to notice, I'm pretty much directing that at you, bucko. Keep it together, no bitch fights."

Dean flinched and glanced at all of us. "Me?"

"Yeah, you. Ok, play time's over. Seeya around, guys." He snapped his fingers.

By the time I got my bearings I noticed we were standing in the parking lot of a motel beside the impala. It took me a good thirty seconds to remember that two weeks before hand we had left the bunker on the drive for Lawrence, after Sam had found a case that sounded eerily similar to Gabriel.

"He must have nabbed us just after we drove into town." Dean stated.

"Yeah-" Sam sighed. "Well, at least everything's back to normal... Kinda."

Cas wouldn't tare his eyes off the ground as pure confusion etched across his face. "I don't understand why he would be so adamant about us staying together?" He said. "This definitely does _not _fit Gabriels personality."

"The fucking with our lives part does." I said. "Or, well... This was the first time he's done it for me, but Sam and Dean have had this happen to them a million times practically."

"So, Cas-" Dean said, thumping his hand on the roof of the car. "Long shot, but- You got any idea what the hell he was talkin about?"

Cas finally tore his eyes away from the pavement and shook his head. "I'm sorry, Dean- But I can't offer any explanation with this one. My knowledge on the fate of the world went as far as Lucifer rising and the apocalypse."

"Is that normal?" I asked. "If there was something big gonna go down in the future wouldn't you and every other angel know about it centuries before hand?"

He nodded. "Yes, I believe so- Unless, of course, it was something only known by the archangels- Which isn't normal protocol. If it was something of this magnitude then generally all of Gods soldiers would be made aware, because assistance would be needed."

"Ok... So, just take a stab in the dark, Cas-" Sam said. "If you had to guess... What's going on?"

Cas' brows furrowed and he looked to each of us. "Theoretically there could be three options-" He answered. "One, either there is a prophecy that was kept hidden from all lower ranking angels, something only Gabriel and the fellow archangels would know about, or... Two... God has decided to set something new into motion, something that had never been prophesized about until recently."

"And three?" Dean asked.

"Three would be Gabriel is being Gabriel, and is only _"screwing"_ with our minds."

I rested my arms on the roof of the car. "And, which one of those three do you think is most likely?"

He sighed and let his eyes trail off to the road in the distance. "I believe that the first option is most likely, Lara. Because God has been missing for centuries, refusing to answer calls, which makes me speculate on why _now _would he suddenly decide to contact Gabriel with an unknown prophecy? And, Gabriel wouldn't go to this extreme if there wasn't a just reason in his mind. Remember, Gabriel has always been about teaching lessons and trying to get his point across. There's no reason to believe he wouldn't be doing that this time as well."

"Awesome-" Dean pulled the drivers door open. "So that means we got some earth shattering prophecy to friggin deal with... Again... Man, I tell ya, when is the fate of the damn world _not _in our hands?"

We all climbed in and pulled out of the motel drive and started back for the bunker.

"Ya know-" I said, interrupting the silence after an hour. "Gabriel said that he's happy about whatever is going to happen, while others, and I'm assuming he's referring to angels, aren't happy about it. Since all of the angels were cast out... How would they have come to learn about whatever this is?"

We each looked to Cas and waited for him to answer and he shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"When the angels were cast out many of them decided to create their own factions. Some, most, are very much so against us- Others aren't, but they're a rare dozen. I'm guessing that those that aren't happy about whatever is to come are those heavily sided against us."

"Well, yeah-" I rolled my eyes. "But how would they have come to learn of it in the first place?"

"That's what I'm trying to understand as well, Lara... Being cut off from heaven, and with God missing... I would think there wouldn't be a way of them learning of this. But of course I could be wrong. It's been two years since the angels fell and not many of them have been willing to divulge information to me willingly. There could be myriads of things that I don't know about now."

Well this was just friggin fantastic- So basically we had no idea of what was going to be coming until it came and smacked us in the face.


	7. Chapter 7

From the moment we returned to the bunker we had all been doing our own bits of researching- Trying to find something that might have mentioned whatever it was Gabrel told us about. But since we had no details what so ever on this up and coming disaster, we didn't know where to start. It's not as though prophecies could be google searched after all.

So we did what we could do, which was looking for signs of demons or angels causing chaos. There was nothing. Eventually two weeks passed and we hadn't left the bunker only to buy food and supplies. Dean was adamant about finding whatever this thing happened to be- He was obsessed is more like it. He stayed up until practically dawn, reading over the books and things filed in the library and in the storage room. We helped him as much as possible but it was becoming more and more clear as the days rolled by that there wasn't anything documented anywhere.

So after those two weeks, we were yet again piled around the table in the library doing the same old thing when suddenly Castiel sat up straight and lied his book down.

"Maybe it's possible that Kevin would know what this pertains to?" He said. "He's a prophet, maybe there's another tablet that's been discovered?"

For a moment Dean awkwardly shifted in his chair, I could tell he felt stupid for not having thought of that himself.

"Uh, yeah... Maybe we should give him a call." He grabbed his phone and dialed Kevins number. I could hear it ringing a good five times before switching to voice mail. "Hey, Kevin- It's Dean... Look, everything's cool, don't worry we're not draggin ya into anything, but- We were wondering if maybe you've heard anything... Or, maybe, if another tablet has showed up? Yeah, gimme a call back."

After he hung up we each let out a sigh. "So, I guess we wait now." I said. "Hopefully he'll be quick about getting back to us."

"Yeah, uh. I don't see that happening-" Sam chuckled. "The kid was pretty eager to get as far away from us as possible."

"Do you blame him?" I thumped my book closed. "We're not exactly good luck charms." Now I pushed away from the table. "Well, since we're done researching for the moment..."

"Hey-" Dean shook his head at me. "We're not done here, cupcake. What's your rush?"

"I'm tired, Dean. In case you haven't noticed for the last two weeks no one has gotten any sleep, so... I thought hey, maybe I'll sneak away and get a few hours before you throw me back into another pile of books."

He pointed to my chair. "Sit, woman- We're not done and we're not gonna be done until we figure out what the hell Gabriel was yammering about."

Cas immediately jumped to my defense. "I can always take over for her, Dean. It's not any trouble."

"We need all eyes on every book in this damn place-" He retorted. "And you can't read two things at once, man."

I flopped back down in my chair and grabbed my book again. "I'm seriously gonna kick you in the cumquats you slave driver."

Dean only sneered at me and went back to his pile of books. And for the next hour I flicked through the pages of a dusty old book, most of which the writing was too faded to read. I started dazing in and out, my eyes were going crossed from being so damn tired. I was certain that hours had gone by, and when I felt someone nudging me over and over again my eyes burst open.

My face was pressed against the book, and I sat up with a groan. "Ugh, what?"

"You fell asleep, Lara." Cas said, his brows scrunched. "We've been trying to wake you for fifteen minutes."

Blinking a few times over, I glanced across the table as Dean pursed his lips at me. "Yeah maybe you do need a break, cupcake."

"Told you." I grumbled. "Just, wake me up in like an hour or so, ok?"

"Got it." Sam replied, barely taking his eyes from his laptop screen.

I practically stumbled my way back to my room and fell onto my bed. It didn't take ten seconds before I was out like a light.

* * *

Once Lara was asleep, Dean peaked in on her and then rushed back to the table.

"Ok, we gotta talk-" He said, making both Sam and Castiel give him awkward glances. "Somethin's up with her, and I think we all know what it is."

Sam instantly knew what Dean was talking about but Cas of course didn't. "What do you mean, Dean?"

Sam sighed and answered for him. "Well... Haven't you noticed that Lara's been acting..." He shrugged. "Kinda weird lately?"

"Weird?" Cas squinted his eyes and stared towards the hallway that led to the bedrooms. "How so?"

"Last week or so, man-" Dean went on. "She's been sleeping a lot more, complaining about headaches and shit... Think about it... It's past the five year mark. Her spell should have dissolved by now."

Castiel suddenly sat up straight. "You think that it's happening?"

"You tell us-" Sam replied. "You're with her more than we are... You sleep in the same room. Have you noticed anything strange?"

Cas cinched his lips as he went into thought. "I... I suppose I haven't been watching for any unusual behavior, so no- I haven't noticed anything. But, now that you're bringing it to my attention she has been overly fatigued lately."

"If that's what it is-" Sam said. "What are we supposed to do about it, huh? There really isn't anything we can do." He sighed. "She had five years, it's past that... So, all we can do is just..."

"Stand back and hope we don't get incinerated." Dean interrupted, then shook his head. "Poor kid... This is the last thing she wanted."

"We can't treat her any differently." Sams tone was insistent. "We knew this was gonna happen eventually, and the last thing she needs is to notice that we're treating her like some kind of freak."

"I would never do that." Cas retorted. "Unlike the three of you I don't consider it to be a negative thing. Lara is simply evolving into a perfect creation of God. In a way, it might actually be positive. At least we would know that she could protect herself completely. And, since there aren't any archangels left behind that would want to cause her harm- She would be the safest out of all of us."

Dean tapped his fingers on the table. "You think maybe this is what Gabriel was talkin about? Maybe this whole thing wasn't some prophecy, but he knew Laras spell was gonna crap out on her and she'd transform?" Sam and Cas' faces went blank. "It would explain a lot. Sure as hell gonna be a shit ton of angels that won't be happy about that."

"And the other half would be-" Cas sighed. "It does make sense. The Seraphim were revered by many. After we believed they were wiped out, hundreds of my siblings actually prayed to God to bring them back."

Sam closed his laptop. "Ok, so- We're just gonna have to keep an eye out on her, and... I guess hope that if it does happen that nothing'll go wrong. It's not like we can just call up Lee and ask for any info. He's been a no show for the last two years. I think the last time Lara talked to the guy was after she got arrested for killing Kevins girl friend."

Castiel nodded. "I had wondered what happened to him after all of the angels were cast out. Obviously he wouldn't have been able to get back into heaven. I'm guessing he's been hiding for the last two years. He's probably been in danger."

"Still, if he's alive I'm gonna kick the dudes ass-" Dean snapped. "We've all been in friggin danger and we don't hide like a bunch of pussies. Lara is the last of their kind, blah blah whatever, he's supposed to be lookin out for her not worrying about himself."

"Technically Dean it wasn't Lees responsibility to watch her-" Cas replied. "I was. She chose me as a guardian, not him. After he fulfilled Gods orders he didn't have any obligation towards her, unless of course it was a moral obligation but the Seraphim never acted out of their own free will- They only went by orders. So, the reason why he isn't overly concerned with Laras welfare is because he doesn't have to be. It's my responsibility."

Dean tapped his fingers on the table. "Yeah, that might be true, but- You ain't an angel anymore. Sure you do what you can, but..."

"Dean-" Cas' tone turned harsh. "She's _my _responsibility. _Not _Lees."

"Ook-" Dean held up his hands in a mocking manner. "Jeez, touchy touchy."

Sam snickered. "Jealous much, Cas?"

Cas' glowered at both brothers. "Jealousy has nothing to do with it."

"Right-" Sam shook his head, unable to keep himself from chuckling. "Then why's your face so red right now?"

"It certainly isn't jealousy." He tried to focus on the book in front of him but Sam and Dean kept laughing.

"Uhuh, you keep tellin yourself that, buttercup. But you gotta admit, you hated Lee from the get go." Dean said.

"Disliking someone doesn't exactly say that it's because of jealousy." Cas scowled, he hated when they picked on him. "He had a personality that wasn't favorable."

Sam and Dean exchanged glances and only shook their head, not buying that for a second.


	8. Chapter 8

Little did my brothers or Cas know but I had heard everything they had said just after I had went into my room. I slept for approximately five minutes before I was jolted awake. And, after snooping in on their convo I felt my stomach twist into knots.

They thought my spell was dissolving... Honestly, that had never really crossed my mind. I tried my best not to think of that horrible thing, but now that they had mentioned it. They were right. The last few days mainly I hadn't been feeling well, I was exhausted, my head was aching like being split in two- Just as it had so long ago when the symptoms had first began to show themselves. I was weak, my muscles felt like mush, and I could only assume that I would start friggin zapping myself to random places pretty soon.

As far as I was concerned Dean was right. This had to have been what Gabriel was talking about. The so called reason why he insisted that we all stick together. It made sense, it certainly would be something we never had to face before- But I didn't exactly understand how the fate of the world tied into it. Unless of course, Gabriel figured that because of this happening maybe I might go on a smite fest and start nuking angels or whoever crossed my path. I didn't know. But, the one thing I was certain of was that I certainly wasn't going to stick around and wait for my spell to dissolve- Therefore putting my brothers and Cas in danger. I couldn't take that risk.

God they were gonna be so friggin pissed at me, Dean would probably kick my ass- But... I knew that at least for the time it took for this whole thing to pass over, I needed to get away from them. Lee said I had five years, it was past that just as Dean said- So for however long it took for the spell to dissolve completely I needed to find a safe place away from them, away from anyone, where I couldn't hurt anybody. This definitely was not going to be pretty, and I figured that it would be the most painful and horrible thing I could go through. But, if it meant sparing my loved ones having to deal with that, then I would do it.

The question now was, when and how the hell would I be able to slip out unnoticed? It's not as though I could waltz out the door any old time I wanted to. Someone was always there, and sneaking out in the middle of the night wouldn't be so simple either. Cas was a light sleeper, and any little shift on the bed bolted him upright. Of course I could always kick him out of my room and make him sleep in his, but then that would only raise the question of why now did I suddenly want to sleep alone?

Best thing I could do really would just be act normal, claim I was going out for food, or running an errand to pick up something else. I would have to do it when all three boys were busy so they wouldn't offer to go with me.

I waited a day or two so they wouldn't get suspicious, and then waited a little while longer until Cas decided to occupy himself in the storage room with Dean, and Sam was clicking around on his computer before I muttered something about running to get take out. Sam barely paid any attention, but just nodded at me and I slipped out and to my car and took off.

First thing I did as I drove was deactivate the GPS on my phone- And I knew that the first stop I'd make I would have to toss it out and buy another. Sam was too smart for his own damn good and could probably track me down by friggin cell phone towers. I also knew that I couldn't pay by credit cards if I happened to stop at a motel or buy food. It was nothing but cash to be used. Yeah, I knew how to disappear if I really wanted to- I had just never done it before. It was two hours before finally someone at the bunker seemed to notice that it shouldn't have taken me this long to bring back food. My phone started buzzing and when I glanced at the ID I noticed it was Cas.

I cursed to myself, wishing it was anyone but him calling. He had the insane capability of completely turning my mind to mush and just imagining his naive little baby face all confused and upset was enough to make a girl go nuts. But I answered anyhow.

"Hey, Cas." I said.

"Lara, where are you? You've been gone for hours?"

After letting out a deep sigh I spit it out. "Ok, listen... I don't want you to freak out, and I don't want Sam or Dean to freak out either, but... I know what's going on, I heard you guys the other day. And, I think you're right... The spell is dissolving, which means I'm dangerous right now, and I'll continue to be dangerous until it's all over and done with."

There was silence for a good thirty seconds on the other end. "Come back to the bunker, Lara. Now, please."

Obviously he knew what I was doing. "I can't, Cas. Not yet. Don't worry I'll be fine. I'm just gonna find a place to chill out and wait until this passes. I'll come back eventually... However long it takes for this to be over anyways."

"No, Lara- You can't do this on your own, it's too dangerous. You don't know the aftermath of the spell dissolving, you need us to help you."

"I'll be fine. You said so yourself so long ago that it won't kill me. As long as that's the case then I'm not gonna stick around and risk hurting you guys. Now I'm sure by the time I hang up Dean will have heard what's goin on, and I know how you all are. You won't be able to track me down, I'm ditching my phone and I won't leave a paper trail. So, just sit tight and whenever this is over I'll come back."

I think I actually heard Cas curse under his breath. "Please, I'm begging you- Don't do this. Come back to the bunker."

"Sorry, babe- But I can't. It's too dangerous. Hopefully I'll be back soon. Bye, Cas."

He managed to squeak out another "No, wait..." Before I hung up and tossed my phone out the window.

Well this wasn't going to end well now was it?

* * *

The first few days after I left I just kept driving, only stopping long enough to get some sleep, and then would start off again. I really had no idea where I was supposed to go. Dean and Sam knew me like the back of their hands, so they would be the first to figure out where the hell I was going. Which meant I needed to not do my usual routine- Which would be jumping from one dump motel to the next and eating at busy fast food places where there was likely to be security cameras. So I slept in my car, and ate crappy snacks from gas stations.

I knew I couldn't keep driving forever, I needed to find some place secluded and quiet that was away from any towns or cities. Rufus' cabin would be a good place to go, but Dean would figure that out instantly. But then there was always the thought that maybe Dean would know that I wouldn't stick to my usual routine and be able to track me that way? Ok, no. Now I was just giving myself a headache.

Finally I ended up finding a campground that rented out small cabins. It was different than where I would usually go, and since it wasn't the right time of year the place wasn't packed. I managed to get a cabin on the complete opposite end of the forest just beside a lake, and the nearest one beside me was practically a half mile away. I paid in cash of course, and made sure to stock up on groceries so I could camp out for the time being.

All I'll say is that it was boring as hell being on my own for the first time in over two years. I missed my brothers, I missed Cas- And I felt like warmed over crap. If I wasn't sleeping during all hours of the day I was having issues with eating. Everything made me gag, and even drinking water was becoming a chore. After the first week went by the only thing I could manage to choke down was coke and top ramen.

My head was rolling practically every second, the pain was so intense that sometimes I would even black out. During the moments I was writhing on the sofa in agony, I could have swore I saw the dreaded sign of my spell breaking. If I wasn't hallucinating, then yet again the veins on the underside of my wrists were glowing orange.

This sucked ass. But I tried to keep it in my head that the reason why I took off was to keep everyone safe. At least I could be thankful that I wasn't zapping myself anywhere. But that didn't mean everything was hunky dory- Because I woke up one morning to the smell of smoke and noticed that sometime during my time sleeping my mind had decided that a throw pillow lying on the floor was deserving of a smiting. I woke up just in time to pour a glass of water on it before it completely burst into a fireball. Thankfully that only happened once, and only once. And after that first week came and went eventually the horrible pain in my head began to fade away to just a dull twinge, and my rolling stomach managed to calm to the point I could at least eat a decent meal instead of stale old noodles. But that didn't mean it was gonna start being kind to me, because I started puking shortly after- And even though it was hard for me to tell I was pretty sure I was running a fever.

From what I remembered, fever usually accompanied becoming comatose and then promptly zapping myself somewhere unusual afterwards. I could only hope it wouldn't happen this time around. Just my luck I'd zap myself to the friggin north pole or something and be completely boned.

Now it was two weeks that I had been away from my boys. And two weeks came and went that I didn't seem to be improving. I didn't know how long this was going to take, but it certainly didn't seem to be letting up on torturing me anytime soon.

It was after passing out on the sofa for the tenth time that day, did I feel someone lightly brushing the hair from my forehead. Naturally I jumped and sat up quickly, and wasn't at all surprised to see Castiel kneeling in front of me.

I rubbed my head and sighed. "How'd you find me?"

"Sam... He called in a favor to a police officer that they had assisted a few years back. He asked to nonchalantly keep a look out for your vehicle. Someone noticed you near the area and Dean put two and two together..." He paused and shook his head. "Are you alright?"

I pulled my face from my hands and shrugged. "How do you think I am?"

"Judging by how exhausted you seem to be- I would guess not well."

"Yeah, well... You'd be right." I glanced at the door. "Are they outside?"

"Yes- They thought it would be better if I came in to get you."

Now I snickered. "Smart move- They knew I wouldn't try to kick the crap out of _you_."

He gave a weak smile. "You shouldn't have run away, Lara. Being alone right now... You can't do it."

"I didn't have a choice, Cas." I leaned forward with my elbows on my knees. "You heard what Lee said so long ago. Once this spell is gone I'm dangerous. There's no knowing when I'll go off. I could kill all of you."

"But you won't." He reached over and grabbed my hand. "Don't you remember, Lara- All of the times in the past when you've shown signs? All of the instances that your abilities were out in the open and you managed to control them? Maybe there's a chance that Leesander was wrong?" He shrugged. "Either way, you're not staying here alone. So, you can choose to come back with us to the bunker, or we'll just stay here with you."

I rolled my eyes. "You guys, seriously- You're so damned stubborn."

He only smiled that little smirk of his and didn't deny that. So, since I didn't have a choice I packed up what little I had in the cabin and walked outside. I was too damned tired to drive my car back, so Sam offered to do it and I climbed in the backseat of the impala and let out a huff.

"Well played, Dean-" I said with a smirk. "Well played."

He glared at me from the rear view mirror. "I could so tare you a new one right now. What the hell were you thinking?"

"That I didn't want to hurt you guys, is that really so hard to grasp?"

Cas climbed in the passenger seat and merely shrugged. "You were always the one to tell me, Lara- That we stick together. If one of us has an issue, than the other three will, as you quoted, step their asses up to help."

I scowled and slumped down in my seat. "I hate when you quote me."

Dean snickered and cranked the car in reverse. "We could always wait a few hours to go. You look like hammered crap."

"Thanks-" I groaned, then laid down on the backseat. "But I'll feel like crap no matter when we go, so... Just step on it."


	9. Chapter 9

When I was shaken awake I sat up to see that we were back at the bunker and apparently I had slept the entire ten hour drive. And after I practically crawled my way to my bedroom I flopped down on my bed and fell asleep yet again. Really, this fatigue was starting to piss me off, how was I supposed to get anything done?

For the next few days Cas watched me like a hawk, and Sam and Dean were the swarming buzzards. Even though my brothers didn't want to admit it, they were worried I might just burn this entire place to the ground. But, really- Other than the extreme fatigue and puking my guts up almost hourly, everything else seemed to be returning to normal. I mean if you ignore the fact that I was incredibly weak and if for some odd reason we found ourselves in a skirmish I would have my ass kicked ten times over. My hands were shaky as well, so there went firing a gun accurately. Basically I hoped that Sam didn't come across a case somewhere because I would be completely useless.

I found out after I was awake for longer than an hour that Kevin had called back during the two weeks I took off. So he claimed there was no new tablet to pop up, and he hadn't heard of anything else happening either. Which of course only strengthened Deans claim that maybe Gabriel was talkin about my stupid spell. Still that didn't stop them all from researching any signs of omens, or signs of angels.

Since we were almost positive that was what Gabriel was talking about, I suppose Dean decided to give up with the researching after another few days. Yeah there was still the question of how exactly the fate of the world tied into all this, but with no way of learning more about it... Yeah, no point. It's not like we could ask Gabriel again, or maybe another angel somewhere. There weren't many out there anymore that didn't want to skin Castiel alive.

Basically the only thing left to do was sit and wait for the shit to hit the fan- Which is pretty much what always happened with us.

As the days went on I only felt worse, but thankfully nothing drastic had happened. I hadn't smote anything else, I didn't zap anywhere or slip into a coma so I guess if the spell was gonna crap out on me then this was the best case scenario.

But I tried my best to fake being healthy in front of the boys, making sure to not fall asleep or puke my guts up when they were around. They were all three stressing out over me, which wasn't necessary. I mean, we knew this was going to happen eventually, and really I got lucky. Five years was gone months ago and thankfully I hadn't done anything in the past to make it go sooner. No I wasn't happy about it, of course not, but what could I do?

I couldn't throw a fit or allow myself to sink into some kind of manic depression. Yeah I hated the thought of changing into something else but at least I had these years to somewhat prepare myself for it.

After a week of being back at the bunker I entered the kitchen early that morning. No one else was up, not even Sam which was surprising. So I decided to be a dear and make breakfast for everyone. The boys had practically been killing themselves lately trying to help me out so I made sure to make something everyone would like- Which just so happened to be pancakes.

I was halfway through flipping them, along with bacon in a second skillet when my stomach suddenly began to roll. Ok seriously, what the hell? Pancakes and bacon were two of my favorite foods and now just smelling and looking at it was making me want to upchuck. By the time I made it to the sink I puked up what little my stomach was holding.

Ok this was getting ridiculous. I could barely eat or drink anything that I loved anymore and on top of that I felt like death warmed over. For a moment I couldn't help but stand there, watching the water go down the drain with my head spinning.

I was starting to wonder if maybe there was something more seriously wrong with me than just the stupid spell dissolving. I would be ignorant not to consider it.

After finishing the breakfast I sat it aside and grabbed Sams laptop. I wanted to do some researching of my own before my boys woke up and I knew I didn't have much time. It wouldn't be long before Dean smelled the bacon and came rushing into the room.

So I quickly typed down my symptoms in google search, minus the smiting of random throw pillows, and watched the long list of random answers pop up.

I blinked a few times over feeling my brow arch. Ok, I'm not stupid, I knew what this seemed like but I didn't want to jump to conclusions.

Other than what i suspected, I could have a number of different things. Ranging from salmonella poisoning to the stomach flu or maybe even another form of being poisoned. Which of course wasn't an option. Salmonella obviously wasn't it either since it had lasted too long. As well as the stomach flu.

My eyes seared into the screen as I tried my best to avoid the one ailment that seemed the most plausible. When I heard footsteps coming I quickly cleared the search history and slammed the laptop closed.

Dean walked in first, as I had predicted- And immediately went to the food.

"You're awesome, kid-" He said, already with a mouthful of bacon. "You ate yet?"

"No, I wasn't hungry." I barely heard myself respond because my mind was spinning.

"You feelin ok? I mean, ya know, considering?"

"A little better-" Lies all lies. "It seems to be letting up some."

"Good." He sat down beside me with his plate piled high. "So what were you lookin at on Sams laptop?"

"Nothin important- Was just looking for a case."

"Find anything?"

I shook my head. "Nah, not really."

He shirked it off as he made out with his pancakes. A few minutes passed as Cas entered the kitchen and then Sam pulling up the rear.

"Good morning." Cas said.

"Mornin." Dean mumbled with his mouth full.

Cas grabbed himself a cup of coffee and sat down.

"How are you feeling, Lara?" He asked.

"Awesome-"I answered, giving a fake smile. "Never better."

Of course he didn't buy that as his eyes squinted and he frowned. God only knows why he didn't call me out on it.

I drifted off into my own thoughts as the boys chit chatted over breakfast. Right at that moment I wished I could wipe my mind clean because I was seriously about to have a freak out. What if I was right? What if it was this dreaded thing that I suspected was wrong with me? What the hell would I do? How could I tell the boys that my life was over? That everything would change so drastically?

By the time I snapped out of it Dean had been waving his hand in front of my face for the better part of an entire minute.

"Kid, what's with you?" He asked. "You've been out of it all mornin."

"Yeah-" I stood and felt my stomach start to roll again. "I guess I'm just tired."

"Anyways..." Dean shrugged, avoiding the topic of what they thought was my spell deteriorating. "I've been doing some thinking. Since we're not really making any progress on figuring out what's gonna go down in the future- I thought maybe we should call up the one prick in the world that would know." He paused, looking to each of us. "Crowley. If his ass is gonna be on the line, which he'll probably think it is, he'd know what's gonna happen."

"I was thinking the same thing." Sam sighed. "But it's not so easy to get hold of him now that he's partially cured."

"Sam's right-" Cas added. "Normal demon summoning spells would no longer be effective on Crowley any longer."

Dean sat back with a scowl. "Any suggestions?"

"Unless there's another spell out there..." Sam tapped his fingers on his cup of coffee. "There really isn't a way. Because, uh, I really don't think he'd come willingly."

Cas' eyes fell to the table. "Honestly we never should have allowed him to leave this place."

"We didn't have a choice." I spoke now. "We needed to know a way to kill Abaddon. He would only give it if we let him go." Yet again I sat after I realized I wasn't gonna puke again. "Ya know you could always do it the old fashion way and call him on the phone?"

"Would rather get him the old _old _fashioned way. Somehow summoning him and getting his pansy ass stuck in a devils trap." Dean retorted. "You think there might be anythin stored with the archives?"

Sam snickered. "I doubt it, Dean. I mean, that I know of being able to cure a demon wasn't even heard of until the 50's. So I doubt there'd be a summoning spell down there on how to call a partially healed demon."

"Can't hurt to look though." Dean stood. "Anyone wanna help me out?"

Cas stood now. "I will."

I watched them leave and then let out a sigh. Sam finally seemed to notice the expression on my face as he gave me his usual puppy eyes.

"Everything ok?" He asked.

"I guess so-" Why did he need to know I was about to have a nervous breakdown? "I just wish this was over already."

"Spell crap?"

"Yeah. Spell crap. I mean, if it's gonna crap out then why can't it just do it already and instead of taking so damn long and continuing to make me feel like shit."

He couldn't answer that question because there was no answer. I know I wasn't the only one getting frustrated, they were as well. Little did they know though was I was getting frustrated for entirely different reasons now.


	10. Chapter 10

Another week passed and as I waited for things to get better, they stayed pretty much the same. Except that the fatigue was getting so horrible that I could barely function during the day- And quite often at times I would fall asleep and not even remember doing so. Several times one of the boys would shake me awake as I was laying face down on a book, or at the kitchen table. I tried to keep myself going by offering to research down in the archives with Dean or making supply runs with Sammy. But even that couldn't keep me awake.

Finally I came to the conclusion that I needed to get to the bottom of this. If, and I was hoping it was **_if_**, I was right about what I suspected then I needed to get it over with and find out already- So I could take the next step. Whatever it might have been.

So, that morning I woke up before everyone else and started in with my ruse. I was going to go and get breakfast, and since the kitchen was pretty well stocked I began to throw food in the garbage. First was a loaf of bread, next was a practically full gallon of milk which I poured down the drain. And finally the bacon, which we had actually just bought the day before but I tossed it in the garbage anyhow. Once I was certain that they wouldn't get suspicious I left the bunker and jumped in my car, making the drive into town

I kept myself in a daze as I drove, and when I pulled into the parking lot of the pharmacy, I still stayed in that daze. I didn't allow myself to think or feel as I walked through the isles like a friggin zombie and found what I was looking for. After grabbing it, I headed for the cash register and lied it on the counter, refusing to look at it for even a second- Instead, I kept my eyes fixed on the packs of cigarettes and bottles of booze.

"10.50-" The woman said, giving me a cute grin, ugh I knew what she was thinking. "Miss?"

I pulled out the cash and handed it to her, and she gave me my change and put my purchase in a plastic baggy.

"Have a nice day." She smiled.

"Thanks, uh... Where's the ladies room?" I asked.

She pointed towards the back of the store, giving me an almost knowing look. "Right back there, sweetie."

I nodded to her and started back towards the bathroom, quickly locking myself inside and doing my business. I knew better than to do something like this back at the bunker- You always see in movies or shows that some dumb moron leaves evidence lying around for someone else to see, therefore rendering the element of surprise null and void. And forget keeping secrets with crap like that lying around, it's not possible. So, yeah, I wasn't that stupid. I wasn't stupid enough to do something like that back where my idiot brothers or Cas could stumble across the evidence.

After flushing the toilet, I stood in front of the mirror splashing water in my face for a good minute or so, and after glancing at my watch, I noticed that an entire two minutes had ticked by in a matter of seconds. So, I picked up the box I left lying on the sink and read the back. According to what it said, two lines is what I should be looking for. And, after grabbing the pregnancy test sitting on the back of the toilet and taking a glance, my heart fell to my stomach.

Two lines... I was pregnant.

* * *

How, how how, no... _HOW_ did this happen? Well I know how it happened, but it was a question of when... Cas and I were always careful, we weren't stupid... Unless you count the times we were in Gabriels fun land. Yeah, ok... That must have been when it happened. Which was approximately six weeks ago, give or take a few days.

Oh my god... I nearly had a panic attack as I drove out of the diners parking lot. I needed a good front here, and I was waiting for the moment that Dean or Sam would call me wondering where the heck I ran off to. I couldn't very well tell them I took a trip to the pharmacy and then came home with nothing- No. So that's why I decided that picking up breakfast would be a good enough reason, especially since I had thrown out whatever bit of breakfast items we had left in the bunker. I needed the front to be believable after all.

Oh my god... How did this happen? I kept repeating that to myself as I drove in a daze. This was insane, this was... I wasn't quite sure what to think right now. This felt like a dream, it hardly seemed real at all. My stomach was rolling and I highly doubted it was from morning sickness already. Or maybe it was seeing is that I'd been puking my guts up for what felt like forever.

Within minutes of leaving the diner my phone started buzzing, so I picked it up, noticing it was Dean as so predicted by myself just moments earlier- And answered.

"Yeah, hey." I said.

"Where you at, kid? We woke up and you were gone." He replied.

"Everything in the fridge was spoiled, so I went out to get something for breakfast."

"Awesome. Did you get bacon?"

I rolled my eyes, and was thankful that he fell for it. "Yeah, of course. I'll be back there in five minutes."

After hanging up I sped up and the time to the bunker was miniscule compared to what I would rather it be... I was trying to think of a way to break the news to everyone. How would be the best way to go about it? Really, there was no good way. The best thing to do would be to just spit it out and let them all freak out. Dean, I knew for certain, was going to throw a massive nuclear bomb sized fit. He would probably beat the crap out of poor Cas, or attempt to castrate him. Sam, well... I really didn't know what he would think. He would stay calm I was sure and wouldn't try to kill Cas, but... Really there was no way of knowing what was going to happen.

When I parked my car and cut the engine, I had to sit there for a good five minutes trying to compose myself before grabbing the to-go bags of food and heading back inside.

I could hear their chatter after hitting the library and they were clearly waiting for me in the kitchen. So I started for it and paused in the doorway.

Sam and Dean were sitting at the table while Cas stood at the counter and poured himself a cup of coffee.

Ok, so... Just spit it out, I told myself. No holding back, just say it and let the drama begin.

"I'm..." My voice cut out and it felt like trying to pull myself through hot coals to say the actual words. "I'm back."

"Finally." Dean jumped up and grabbed the bags from my hands. "I'm starving."

My face went blank when Cas turned and gave me a small smile. Oh holy crap... What the hell did we do?

"Lara?" Sam waved a hand in front of my face. "You ok?"

"Maybe tomorrow-" I mumbled, not hearing anything he said and walking into the kitchen.

"Uh, what?" He snickered.

"What?" I shrugged. "Sorry, I'm a little out of it."

"Apparently." Sam sat down and started going through the bag.

I sat down and Cas sat beside me, which made me go stiff... Thank god he wasn't an angel anymore, who knows he probably would have been able to sense the squirming tad-pole in my stomach from a mile away.

"Hey-" Dean kicked me from under the table. "What's your problem? You look like you're gonna crap yourself."

I mumbled something that sounded more or less like "Gobblestorts" which made Deans brows arch.

"That wasn't a valid reply-" Cas said, leaning closer. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine..." I tried to snap myself out of it. "I'm just tired."

"Yeah-" Sam put his elbows on the table. "You've, uh... Been sleeping a lot more lately, Lara. Does this have something to do with, I dunno... Maybe the spell? I mean, we thought that might have been it before but you kinda snapped out of it for a while."

Yes! Oh my god, Sam was a genius! I could so easily use that as an excuse still, at least for the moment.

"Yeah..." I lied, of course I was lying. "I think so. I mean... It feels the same."

"Great-" Dean said with his mouth full. "Just what we need on our plates right now, I thought we dodged that."

"Knock it off, Dean." Sam defended me. "She can't help it."

Cas immediately grabbed my chin and looked into my eyes. "Her pupils aren't dilated this time- Although, that was only a sign right before she slipped into a coma." His eyes darted across my face. "There is more color to her cheeks though... Are you wearing cosmetics?"

"No." I smacked his hand away. Great, I was already "glowing" like a pregnant person. "Of course not."

He lied his hand on my forehead now. "No temperature. So the flush to your cheeks couldn't be caused from that. Lara, you can tell me the truth. Have you been experimenting with cosmetics?"

"Cas..." I grumbled. "When have I ever worn makeup?"

He shrugged. "Never, honestly I never believed you required it. You always had what I considered was a natural beauty and coating chemicals on your face I figured would only hide that."

"Gross." Dean said, shoving a strip of bacon in his mouth. "Take it to the bedroom, Romeo."

"Dean, I was only speaking truthfully- I wasn't trying to illicit sexual activities." Cas retorted.

I pushed away from the table. "Well if you'll all excuse me, I think I'd like to go throw up now."

Breakfast sounded absolutely awful, and the smell of everything combined was making chunks rise in my throat. I needed to get out of the kitchen before I puked all over the table.

That went well... I thought, yeah so well. I so totally told them that I was knocked up. God, I was the biggest chicken in the world. Yeah, it's not like I had all the time in the world to keep this a secret. With in a few months the signs would become completely obvious. What would be my explanation then, huh? Oh, nope guys- Clearly I'm not about to drop a litter on the kitchen floor, I'm just really really bloated, too much salt. Yeah, that would go over really well.

I closed my bedroom door and rushed into the bathroom, just making it to the toilet before I yacked all over the place. And after five minutes of a gag fest I flushed it down and washed my face.

Knocking on my bathroom door. "Lara, are you alright?" Cas called out.

"I-I'm fine." I grabbed the mouth wash and swished it a good thirty seconds. "Be right out."

I opened the door and blotted my face with a towel. "What's up?"

Yeah, so smooth.

"You were vomiting. Are you sure you're alright? Maybe you should rest?" He yet again felt my forehead. "I don't understand. You have no temperature, and there are no other visible signs of the spell deteriorating- Are you certain that's what this ailment is caused from?"

I shrugged. "Well, yeah... I mean... What else could it be from?"

He eyed me suspiciously. "I don't know. Maybe it was something you ate?"

"I doubt it-" I flopped down on the bed and felt my head spin. "If it's not the spell then maybe it's a bug or something."

Or a human being growing in my womb...

He didn't look convinced and rightfully so. No, Cas still hadn't grasped being "human" to the max just yet. He was still completely oblivious when someone was outright lying to his face, but of course he suspected something.

"Well-" He gave me a faint smile. "Perhaps you should sleep. We aren't leaving for another few hours for the supply run since Dean needs to make repairs on his vehicle."

I nodded. "Yeah, maybe that's a good idea."

He leaned over and lightly kissed my forehead and cheek, then actually turned the covers down for me. Yeah, sometimes he could be incredibly sweet, which in turn made me feel incredibly guilty for lying to him. But, I just wasn't ready to talk yet. I just couldn't tell him.


	11. Chapter 11

I was lightly shaken awake, and then more forcefully before I felt a smack on the back of my head.

"Wake up!" Dean barked, shaking me again.

"Ugh, ok!" I snapped back. "What the hell, dude?"

"You've been sleeping for six hours, get your lazy ass outa bed."

I sat up and groggily rubbed my head. "Six hours? I thought we were going on a supply run?"

"Cas and Sam are on that- Cas said he tried to wake you up and you wouldn't budge, and being the sappy s.o.b he is, he decided to let you sleep and take your place." He nudged me. "So get up and give me a hand with researching, huh?"

"Researching what?"

He stared at me like I was an idiot. "Remember? Crowley, kind of a big deal don't you think?"

"Oh..." I pulled the covers off and stood. "Yeah, ok I'll be there in a sec."

He left my room and I hobbled out after a trip to the bathroom. When I reached the library he was already sitting at the table with a stack of books in front of him.

"Where do you want me to start?" I asked, after a loud yawn.

He arched a brow at me and slid a book across. "There I suppose. See if you can find anything on finding a demon that's been partially cured."

"Somehow I doubt there will be anything in there."

"Yeah, well... Gotta start somewhere." He watched me flick through the pages for a moment before saying. "Hey, lemme ask you something, kid."

I flicked my eyes upward for a split second. "Ok, shoot."

"Yeah, uh I don't wanna piss you off or anything, it's just..." He shrugged. "Let's just say it's based purely off of curiosity..." Pausing, I waited for him to go on. "Tell me about how serious this thing is between you and Cas."

"This _thing_?" I replied sarcastically.

"You know... Whatever it is you call what you two do together. I mean, it's been goin on for... Well I guess since the beginning. He's had a thing for you, but we never really knew what. And, now... He's human and, well... I guess I just wanna know- Does he, uh..." He cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Well does he love you?"

I blinked a few times over, surprised he let that word escape his mouth. It was well known that Dean wasn't a lovey dovey dude. He just didn't do the whole "love" thing. "Well... Those words have never come out of his mouth if that's what you mean?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I was afraid of that..."

"Why? What are you thinking?"

Sitting back, he crossed his arms. "Think about it, Lara- Ok, yeah you and him, you had some kind of bond or whatever when he was an angel, right?" I nodded. "And, after he became human you were the first one he turned to, right?" Yet again I nodded. "I guess I'm just thinkin that, if you had never come around, say we never met you, who would Cas have turned to then?"

My stomach started to roll... "Uh, I don't know?"

"Exactly... I dunno, I guess I just wonder sometimes if maybe you were just the one he turned to cause you were here... If you weren't here, would he maybe turn to someone else? Some other chick? You said it yourself, he's never said he loves you, so..."

"So you think that I'm just, what? Easy access so he sticks with what he knows?"

He nodded. "Basically... Hey I'm not tryin to start a fight, or piss you off, it's because I'm legitimately concerned here. He's not a normal dude, we all know that. So, ask yourself, what exactly are the two of you, huh? Are you actually something, or is he just clinging to you because it's easiest and familiar?"

Now I sat back, honestly I had never thought about that before. "I... I don't know- Why are you asking me this now?"

"It's just somethin I always wondered I guess... I mean, Cas isn't exactly very reliable. He's taken off on us so many times I've lost friggin count. Think about it, if by some chance he manages to get his mojo back, becomes an angel again, do you think he'd stick around like he has been lately? Or do you think he'd take off and only come around every once in a while?"

This was so not the conversation to be having right now. Not now... Horrible horrible timing, but... Dean was right in a way.

"I don't know. I suppose he would leave again. I mean, he pretty much stayed here with us because he had to. When he was an angel and had his powers, he didn't need our protection."

"Yeah..." His lips pursed. "He'd take off and try to fix things again, fuck up like he always does, and then who knows what would happen after that." He sighed. "I don't want any chick flick moments, kid- But, I don't want you getting your hopes up when it concerns him."

I nodded and pushed away from the table. "I know... And you're actually making some pretty good points... Maybe I should talk to him?"

"Maybe..." We went silent when the door to the bunker creaked open and echoed into the library. "Maybe now you'll get your chance, huh?"

I let out a deep breath and heard their footsteps approaching. Cas entered first carrying several bags in each hands before sitting them down on the table.

"I believe we have everything." He said, giving me a small smile. "Sam is bringing the rest of the supplies."

"Awesome-" Dean stood but not before passing me a look.

"Are you feeling better, Lara?" Cas asked, rounding the table. "You seem to be."

"Uh, maybe-" I motioned towards the hallway that led to the bedrooms. "We need to talk."

He nodded and followed me back to my room where I quickly closed the door and started pacing. His eyes followed my every move for a good three minutes before he cleared his throat.

"Is everything alright?"

"I don't know..." I stopped and let out a breath. "Ok, I'm gonna ask you a question and I want an honest answer, ok?"

He nodded. "Of course."

"Ok-" I pushed my hair from my face and tried to calm my nerves. "What am I to you?"

"Excuse me?"

"It's a simple enough question, right? What exactly am I to you?" When his eyes went squinty I knew he obviously wasn't understanding the question. "Ok, let me put it this way. Sam and Dean, they're your friends, right?" He nodded. "You consider them to be like your brothers, right?"

"Yes, Lara. Of course. I've always felt that way."

"Ok, good. So, what am I? Clearly you couldn't consider me your sister, because that would just be weird, seeing is that we have _sex _and all. So, obviously I'm not considered your sister, right?"

"No, Lara. I would not consider you my sister." He was uncomfortable already.

"So, what am I? Am I your friend?"

"Yes, you've always been my friend."

"So, friends with benefits?" His brows scrunched cause he had no idea what the eff that meant. "Meaning, friends that have sex... Is that what we are?"

He thought for a moment, and shrugged. "I suppose? Although saying that doesn't feel quite right."

Yeah, no kidding, I was about to punch him in his cute little baby face. "Ok, so... Say... I never existed, say when I died all those years ago, I stayed dead... You following me?"

"Yes, but I don't like the turn the conversation has taken."

"Just hear me out. So, I'm dead. Never came back, was never resurrected. And, here you are right here and now, with Sam and Dean, hunting blah blah, living in the bunker. Since I'm not here, would you have another friend with benefits?"

His eyes got shifty to the point I thought his head was going to explode from confusion.

"Another friend? One that I would be intimate with?" I nodded. "I can't answer that question, Lara. If you had never come back, there's no way of knowing how the future would have ended up. I very well might have died after the incident with Purgatory, I could have died long before that, or after. There's no way of knowing if I would even be here with Sam and Dean."

"Work with me, Cas. This is a hypothetical question."

"Alright..." He thought for a moment. "Honestly, had you never been resurrected... I don't know what my life would be like in the here and now."

I sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed my temples. This was giving me a headache.

"Ok, change of subject. Instead, let's say, some situation turned up. One that you might not be happy about. Let's say, for particular reasons that are my own, that I was the one responsible for making you unhappy. Not intentionally of course, but yeah... Say something happened that could be considered very very bad... What would you do? Would you leave?"

"Is this a life threatening situation?"

"Nope. Not life threatening, but it could possibly completely crush you emotionally... OK, no, this isn't working-" I stood again. "I'll just ask you point blank and flat out. What am I to you dammit? I mean, we've been in whatever the hell you want to call our relationship for two years, and before that we had whatever the hell you want to call _that_- So, answer me. What the hell am I to you?"

Well for future reference if I ever wanted to confuse the crap out of Cas, this was definitely the way to do it.

"I... Can't answer that question, Lara-" He said. "Because I don't know."

"You don't know?" No, no no. I wasn't going to cry. "How could you not know?"

"Because I don't know the answer to that..."

I threw my arms up in the air. "Well, that's just friggin fantastic! Good to know, Cas!"

Ok, I'd had enough of this conversation, and I knew if I stayed in that room with him any longer then I would probably kick the crap out of him. So, I flew past him and ripped the door open, running straight into Sam as he was walking past.

"Hey, whoa- Slow down there, kiddo." He said, snickering.

"Shut the hell up." I retorted and darted down the hallway, through the library and up the stairs.

* * *

Sam was taken aback, enough so that his face was completely blank and he looked to Cas for some kind of answer.

"Uh, Cas? You wanna explain what just happened?"

Cas shrugged. "I honestly have no idea, Sam. She's clearly angry with me, and I don't know why..." His eyes widened slightly. "What could I have done to make her angry?"

"Good question-" He shrugged. "Why don't you fill me in on what you were talkin about, huh?"

He smacked Cas on the shoulder and led him to the kitchen where he grabbed two beers. He pointed to the chair across from his and Cas sat.

"Well..." Cas started. "Lara first asked me what I considered her? Honestly the question confused me because I..."

"Oh, crap." Sam interrupted. "So, uh..." He tried not to laugh. "What answer did you give her?"

"As I stated, I clearly didn't understand the question so she tried giving me hypothetical situations. Still, I had no idea what she was getting at. You know, sometimes I believe it would be much simpler if she would just say what's on her mind instead of turning everything in a riddle."

"Yeah-" Sam took a swig of beer. "Welcome to being in a relationship, buddy. So what did you tell her?"

"After pointing out that I considered Dean and yourself my family, I told her that I didn't consider her family because as she claimed, it would be strange since we have an intimate relationship. So, I told her she was my friend..."

"Oh man..." Sam pushed his hair from his eyes. "You're really dense sometimes."

"Why?" He cocked his head to the side.

"Uh... Because she was trying to get you to tell her how you feel about her, that's why. Ok, so, when women want something, and remember this always, they _never _flat out ask you... They beat around the bush, twist things around and end up getting you to confess something that isn't even true and then they get _pissed _at you, when it's not even your fault." He paused. "You following me?"

"Not at all." Cas shook his head.

"Do I need to draw you a picture, Cas?" Sam thumped his beer down on the table. "Ok, answer me this. Have you ever told Lara your feelings for her?"

Cas' face flushed red. "No."

"There ya go-" He pointed at him. "That's what she was after. Think about it, man. It's been two years that you've been together, and all of this time you've never _once _said how you feel about her?"

"I just assumed it was implied? Is it customary to express your feelings?"

"Uh, yeah-" He laughed. "When it comes to women, it is."

"I never knew that. I thought that it was most obvious by this point? What am I supposed to tell her?"

Sam stared at him slightly slack jawed, really could someone be so clueless?

"She's probably wondering if, maybe... You're just _using _her because she's there. She's the only woman in this bunker, the only woman in all of our lives. You were in need of... Ugh, comforting, a while back after you became human, she was there. So, she's probably starting to wonder if that's all it is. So, if that's _not _what all of this is, if it's more than that. You need to tell her... Trust me."

Cas suddenly looked panicked. "I don't want her to believe that I'm only using her."

"Ok, well-" He pointed towards the door. "You should probably go and tell her that, dude."

"But she's angry with me?"

"And you being honest with her will fix that. She needs to know what's going on and where she stands."

He nodded and stood from the table. "Thank you, Sam- For making this clear."

"Yeah, go, dude. Go... Hurry up, trust me- You don't want Lara pissed at you."

Cas practically ran from the kitchen which made Sam roll his eyes...

"What am I a marriage counselor now?" He snickered.

* * *

I tried to go to my quiet place, which was the hillside just outside the bunker underneath the trees. In the distance I could see the view of nothing but countryside, with no buildings in site. Thankfully this entire place was like an invisible black spot on the map, no demons, angels or anything, could find us here. So even if I was sitting outside alone I was perfectly safe.

When footsteps approaching broke my attention I glanced just long enough to see Cas heading up the hill. Not a good time, definitely not. I needed alone time, I needed to sit and dwell on the fact that I was so completely screwed now.

He stopped beside me and gave a small smile. "Can I sit with you?"

"Sure."

He sat beside me and sighed. "This is a nice area. It's quiet, very peaceful actually." I said nothing. "You know... I was thinking, or rather remembering the moments in the past- Before I became human-" He shook his head. "I made so many disastrous decisions, it was so ignorant of me. I hurt you, I know that- Which was something that I never wanted to do, Lara. But, I thought I was doing it for the right reasons. My first and only thoughts were _what _could I do to be certain you were safe. Because, you see... From the first moment I met you, even the first moment I set eyes on you so long ago after you helped us escape those demons in the warehouse- You had me completely entranced." I went stiff slightly, but couldn't force myself to look at him. "I was confused at first, no one had ever had such an affect on me. I had been living for thousands of years, had encountered countless humans in my time, and never once had any of them forced me to feel that way."

Now I finally looked at him, but his eyes were drifting off at the landscape. "Sam and Dean forced you to feel things too, right?"

"That was different. They were my friends, first and foremost. And eventually became like my family. My real family. But, with you it was something more than that. You honestly have no idea what I went through. Being an angel, you're not supposed to feel anything. It's supposed to be obedience, complete devotion to being a warrior for god. Feelings or emotions leads to doubt, which for an angel is obviously dangerous." He looked down at me. "But, I didn't care about any of that- I devoted myself to you at first glance. It was confusing at first and often I would sit for hours and reflect on what the reason for that would be. That emotion was completely foreign to me, but what I did know was that I never wanted it to leave me. For the first time in my long existence I felt complete- And I was willing to do whatever it took to be certain it would stay... But, then you were killed. You were... Ripped away from my grasp and nothing I could do could stop it. I tried to find you, for months, but I couldn't. I searched Heaven, hell, the entire world... You were lost to me."

"I'm sorry."

"That changed me, in ways that makes me so ashamed now. I turned into something that I hated. But, I was motivated by anger and revenge, and I honestly believed that if I opened Purgatorys door and absorbed all of the souls, became the new God- Then I could finally find you and bring you back." He sighed. "But, that didn't happen as you well know. And I suppose all of that is in the past. But what I'm trying to say is, Lara- Is that you mean more to me then anything in existence. There is nothing that I wouldn't do for you, or give you. You are the sole reason why I even wake in the mornings." He paused and took hold of my hand. "I suppose I could tell you that... I love you, but-" My eyes widened and my heart felt like it stopped. "That word... Love... Doesn't properly define it, because what I feel for you, is so much more than that. There is no word in creation that could properly describe it, it just doesn't exist. No, love definitely isn't a strong enough word or emotion. So, I suppose that is the reason why I couldn't answer your question a few moments ago. Because I was afraid I would fail in telling you how I feel." He smiled. "So, I will just say that... I can't live without you- I tried, and I failed completely. And I never, ever want to try again. If you didn't exist, then neither would I."

I was completely stunned into silence, and I could barely make out his face through the tears in my eyes. No, I didn't expect that kind of response, definitely not at all. And it certainly wasn't like me to blubber like an idiot.

"I... I don't know what to say." I blabbered.

"You don't have to say anything, Lara." He shrugged. "You wanted to know how I felt, and what I thought of you... And that was it."

"But... Don't you want to know how I feel?"

"I do know. After all, what type of person would actually send themselves to Purgatory for someone, and risk their lives, if they didn't care for that person?"

I snickered. "Yeah well, you're wrong... It's more than just caring about you. It's been more than that for... I actually don't even know how long. It's funny ya know..."

"What's that?"

"That it's been years that we've known each other, and for the first two we somehow managed to not say any of that. I mean, it took me coming to Purgatory to finally get you to kiss me."

"Well... I was afraid. I didn't know if it would be proper. But if it's any consolation, I very much so wanted to. Long before that moment."

"Yeah... Me too... It drove me crazy actually." I squeezed his hand. "Thank you, Cas. I can't explain right now why it is I needed to know that, but... I'm happy you finally told me. And you're right... It is much more than love, even for me. And I think I would fail much more than you at trying to explain it."

He rested his head against the tree. "I'm just happy that you're no longer angry with me. I hate when you're angry with me."

"Well you're off the hook now." I nudged him playfully, then kissed his cheek. Just as always his eyes closed and his grip tightened on my hand.

He shifted his face until his lips met mine, and we stayed that way for a good minute before more footsteps crunched up the hill.

"Uh-" Sam cleared his throat. "Sorry to interrupt."

Cas pulled away and nodded. "It's fine, Sam. Is there something you need?"

"Well, Dean wanted me to come and tell you that you were supposed to help him out... Ya know, with the spell?"

"Oh." Cas pulled himself to his feet. "I completely forgot. Lara, do you mind?"

I snickered and shook my head. "No, go. The last thing you need is Dean biting your head off."

He smiled and descended the hill, I watched him go until the bunker door closed.

"So, I take it that went well?" Sam said, sitting beside me. Only then did I notice he held a beer which he handed me.

"Yeah, more then well. And I take it, that was your doing?"

"Not really. Cas was just completely clueless and you confused the crap out of him. As usual."

"That's what I do best." I sat the beer down on the ground next to me.

"So..." He eyed me closely. "If that's resolved, why do you still look like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like your entire world is crashing down around you, and you want to jump off a bridge?"

I nodded, then let out a sigh. I needed to tell someone, and Sam for the moment was the best person to tell. He was the only one I knew wouldn't freak out on me.

"Well, why don't you try to guess, huh? You're observant. What have you noticed lately?"

"Uh..." He sat up straight. "Lately? Well, you've been moody, for one thing."

"Uhuh, and?"

"And... You've been sleeping, puking and..." Suddenly his eyes widened. "And you're clearly not interested in that beer."

"Ok, so put the pieces together, jumbo."

He turned to face me, his eyes looked about ready to pop out of his head. "Are you... Pregnant?"

"Bingo."

Sam had stopped breathing, enough so that when he finally did let out a breathe of air his face had started to turn blue.

"Oh my god..." He fidgeted like he had an itch he couldn't reach. "How did... When? Oh my god, Lara. This is huge."

"How? Well I'm pretty sure you learned about that in sex-ed class, bud. And as far as when? I'm thinking around six weeks ago, when Gabriel was playing mind fucks on us."

"When did you find out?"

"This morning. When I left to get breakfast I stopped at the pharmacy and took a pregnancy test."

"Well... Uh... Does Cas know?"

"No-" I turned quickly. "And you can't tell him, you gotta keep your mouth shut with this one, I'm serious. You can't say anything to Cas or Dean, please."

"Ok, ok. Yeah, of course. I won't tell them, but... You're going to right?"

"Yeah, I'm just trying to figure out how..." I grumbled. "Ugh, Sam. What the hell am I supposed to do? Dean is going to flip his shit, and Cas... I love him and all, but my god... He doesn't know the first thing about being a Father, he can't even grasp being human yet."

"Shyeah, but regardless, you have to tell them, kiddo. This isn't exactly something you can keep secret for very long, unless..." He furrowed his brows. "Well, do you plan on having this kid?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Uh... Well there are ways of preventing that. Would that be something you'd consider?"

"No. Absolutely not. I could never do that."

He nodded, looking instantly relieved. "Good, I mean- It's completely your choice to make, I know, but... Wow... I just don't even know what to say."

"Double that by a billion and you'd be where I'm at right now."

He leaned back against the tree and shook his head. "Jeez... A baby... That's just crazy."

"Yeah, and go ahead and get it over with. Tell me how stupid it is, how big of a mistake, that I'm stupid for even thinking I could have a kid... Blah blah blah."

"Actually-" He chuckled. "I don't think it's such a bad thing, Lara. I mean, think about it. Our lives, for the most part, suck... Maybe this could actually be what's missing, ya know? Something to bring a little happiness into our lives."

"I dunno. You might feel that way, but that's not speaking for Dean or Cas."

"Dean, yeah he's gonna be the tricky one. But, Cas... He really loves you- So, you never know... Maybe he'd be happy about it too?"

I stood and felt my stomach drop. "I think I'm gonna puke again."

He jumped to his feet and took hold of my arm. "Do you... Need anything?"

"Yeah, a toilet." After a few deep breaths the nausea subsided. "Ok, well. For right now just keep this to yourself. I need to think of how I'm gonna break the news to them."

"Yeah, you got it. Whatever I can do to help." He suddenly cringed slightly. "Damn, uh... I just remembered. Dean found a case in Illinois. He wants to head out in the morning. What are we gonna do about that?"

"Nothing? I'm going to go just like I always do."

He stared at me now like I was stupid. "Lara... You're pregnant. You can't just run into a place guns blazing, you could get hurt."

"Well then I'll avoid the dangerous situations, comon- You gotta have my back here, Sammy."

He practically held his arms out in front of me as I descended the hill, as though I'd trip and tumble down. Once I reached the bottom I swatted at him.

"Stop that. If they see you, they're gonna wonder what the eff you're doing." I snapped.

"Sorry. It's just weird... I need to adjust."

"Oh, I'm sorry- Is this new found piece of information making you uncomfortable? Well try being the one that's pregnant!"

He cringed. "Gotcha... Sorry."

"Yeah, me too. I was a bitch before, think about how I'm gonna be now. So, I'm apologizing in advance for anything I might say, or throw at you later."

He only laughed as he pulled the door open and we returned to the bunker.


	12. Chapter 12

_**I just want to say thanks for the reviews :D**_

* * *

Cas and Sam had to go on yet another supply run, after Dean announced that they had brought back the wrong incense for their supposed ritual or spell. Honestly, I don't know why they were even going to bother with it. Crowley had been m.i.a for over a year, there wasn't going to be any way they could find him. He was partially healed now, which mean normal demon summoning chants didn't work on him any longer. The only way he was going to show up was if he wanted to.

But, Dean was perseverant and didn't want to give it up. He wanted to find the limey mook and stick him back in the dungeon where he rightfully belonged. Myself? I just wanted to forget about him entirely. He brought about nothing but trouble, even when he was in chains, and I didn't feel like dealing with his crap anymore.

Dean strolled into the library carrying a tray with food and beer. He sat a burger down in front of me, along with a beer which I cringed at.

"Thanks." I said, grabbing the burger and taking a bite. It was the first bit of food I could actually hold down all damned day.

"No problem." He sat down now and dug in. "My god... I'm a genius. I should cook these babies professionally."

"They are pretty damned good, bro. I think I'm gonna want another one after this."

"Fatty-" He sneered. "Crack open that beer before you choke to death."

"Nah, I'm good." I took another bite and tried to avoid his eyes.

"Seriously, you're scarfing that thing down like a starving animal. You're gonna choke."

"Dude, I'm fine, really. I'm not an idiot, I know how to chew my food."

I popped the last bite in my mouth and it only took a minute to inhale the entire burger, and I was still starving.

"Jeez, pig." He snickered. "Hungry or something?"

"You could say that. I need water now."

"Seriously... Beer, it's awesome. New brand I picked up, try it."

"I don't want the damn beer, Dean. Jesus."

He arched his brows. "Sheesh, what are you pregnant or something?" He chuckled, but my face went blank. After a moment of his laughing suddenly his mouth dropped open and he spit out his bite of food. "That was supposed to be a joke, Lara?! I was joking!"

I couldn't speak and instead sat there completely ashen.

"No you're not..." He stood and started nervously snickering, then like a switch went off his temper flared and he slammed his palms down on the table. "You're not?! Right? Please tell me that you're messin with me right now?"

"Dean..."

"Oh, holy crap..." He started pacing. "No way, no friggin way! You're lying! Right? I mean... How ridiculous and stupid would that be? Right?"

"Keep telling yourself that, Dean. Maybe you can spin around in circles, go back in time, and never figure it out."

He ran his hand down his face. "Oh, that son of a bitch." He waved his finger in the air. "I'm gonna kill him. Yeah, he's dead. Dead... I'm going to tare his frickin face off!"

"Dean!" I jumped to my feet. "No you're not! It's not like this was intentional!"

"I don't care!" He suddenly grabbed his stomach. "I'm gonna puke."

"Gee, I wonder why? Maybe it's because you're freakin out with a stomach full of greasy cheeseburger?"

"No! It's because Cas isn't here for me to kill!" He started pacing again. "Seriously, Lara? What the hell?"

"Like I said... It wasn't intentional."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better? You two have known about this for how long exactly?"

"I've known about it since this morning. Cas still doesn't know, and you're gonna keep your fat mouth shut or I swear to god I will drop your limp body into a river!"

Just my luck I heard the bunker door creak open and footsteps descending the stairs. Oh no, this was not going to be pretty. As soon as Cas and Sam stepped into the doorway Dean descended on Cas like a bird of prey.

"There you are you son of a bitch!" He said, grabbing Cas by the collar and slamming him into the wall. "Take a good look at my face, buddy- Cause it's the last thing you're ever gonna see!"

"Dean!" I rushed over and tried to pry him away. "Knock it off!"

"Shut up, Lara!" He shook Cas slightly who had gone wide eyed. "I'm gonna break his neck!"

"Whoa, Dean." Sam as well tried to break them apart but he was stuck like glue. "Just calm the fuck down, we can talk about this!"

"No we can't!"

"What did I do?" Cas asked, his eyes was moving to each of us. "I swear Dean I haven't done anything!"

"Yes you did! You knocked up my sister!"

Cas' brows scrunched. "I don't know what that means!"

Apparently that only pissed Dean off more. "It means, you fucking idiot- That you got my sister pregnant!" Cas' face suddenly went blank. "Yeah, that's right. Lara's pregnant, you douche bag, and now I have to break your neck!"

"Dean-" Sam grabbed him by the shoulders and for once the big tree couldn't force Dean to move. "Just calm down, kicking the crap out of Cas isn't gonna change anything."

"No, but it sure as hell will make me feel better."

Cas looked ready to pass out, but he looked over at me. "Lara? Is it true?"

I took my face into my hands and tried not to scream. "Yes, god dammit. It's true, and thank you, Dean. Thank you so much. For your information, I hate you right now!"

"Me?" He let go of Cas and he slumped to the floor. "Why do you hate me?"

"Try to figure that out while I'm pounding your face in!" I said and lunged at him but Sam quickly caught me.

"Ok, everyone needs to calm down!" He shouted. "There will be no breaking anyones necks, no pounding any faces in, everyone calm the fuck down before I lock you all in the dungeon!" He grabbed Cas now and pulled him back to his feet. "Dean, go to your room, Cas, you go to yours. Lara... Go... Throw up or something."

"You're putting us in time out?" Dean scowled.

"Yeah, because you're acting like a frickin five year old right now, Dean. This, what's going on with them, isn't any of your business. And call me crazy, but I'm sure Cas has a lot of questions right now, which we will let them get to. Won't we?"

Deans face was blood red, and he was still hopping mad, and poor Cas looked stunned speechless.

"Ya know what?" I threw up my arms. "How about I just leave, and you all can stay here and beat each other up? Sound good?"

I turned and stomped back into my room and slammed the door. Of course I hadn't sat down on the bed for five minutes before Cas knocked.

"Yeah, just get in here." I called out, my head in my hands.

The door creaked open and he peaked in at me, after he finally mustered up the courage to enter and close the door behind him, he warily approached the bed and sat down beside me.

"Are you certain?" He asked, his voice was so faint I could barely hear him.

"Yeah... Pretty damn certain."

He went silent, and for a moment I wondered if he went and died on me. When I pulled my head out of my hands and looked at him, he was staring wide eyed at the wall.

"How?" He asked now.

"How? Really? You want me to go over that one with you? Do I need to draw you a diagram?"

"No-" He snapped out of it slightly. "I meant, how is it possible?"

"Uh... That still doesn't make much sense, babe."

"I'm sorry, I just..." He stopped, almost as though his thoughts blew away with the breeze as he yet again stared blankly at the wall.

"Go on?" I nudged him.

"I have been punished for all of the wrongs I've committed in the past. I attempted to do penance in Purgatory, I accepted my fate of becoming human because I assumed that was Gods way of punishing me. So... How is it that this has happened? This doesn't make sense. Why would God bless me with something positive?" His mouth went agape and he turned to face me. "Lara do you think this is Gods way of telling me that he's forgiven me for my crimes? By blessing me with a gift?"

I tried to blink away my astonishment. "Um, Cas... This happened because we didn't use a condom."

"But what if that isn't it? What if this really is a blessing?"

"I fail to see how this could be a blessing. Sure, he's blessing you, but cursing me with nine months of agony and horrifying child birth?"

His brows scrunched. "Are you not happy about this?"

"Are you?"

I watched his eyes trail away as a slight smile crept across his face. "I am. I really believe I am. Although, I'm still somewhat in shock from learning about it."

"Yeah, Dean's an asshole. I'm gonna kick his ass later."

"When did you learn about this?"

"Just this morning, that's all. I was just trying to find a way to tell you."

He nodded and the smirk wouldn't fade from his lips. "It's amazing. I think it really is a miracle."

Well at least someone was happy about it. Sam was, well... I guess he was ok with it, Dean was pissed enough that he would crap fire, and me? I guess I was indifferent. I wasn't unhappy, nor happy about it either.

* * *

The next couple of days were the strangest of my entire life. Cas had decided with no agreement from me, that he was going to start acting like a crazy person. He wouldn't let me do anything for myself. If I was thirsty, he would run into the kitchen and grab me something before I could get up. If I was hungry, he would either cook me what I wanted, or drive into town and get it. He cleaned up everything, he did my laundry, he practically wanted to carry me everywhere so I wouldn't have to friggin walk. Basically, he was babying me like crazy and I was about ready to scream.

Sam and Dean? Well, Sam was pretty much treating me normally, except every once in a while I would catch him staring at me with a lopsided and goofy looking smile. Dean? Actually, what _didn't _surprise me was that he was treating both Cas and I like crap. If he wasn't completely ignoring Cas, then he was snapping and cussing at him, or simply treating him well, like crap.

The job we were going to take Dean decided to call Garth and have him check it out. He didn't want to leave me alone at the bunker since apparently being pregnant meant you were on the verge of dying, and he wouldn't let me come on the hunt either because of what he said was my "condition". So yeah, basically after the first few days I was ready to rip my hair out, and I couldn't understand how I was going to make it through the next eight months.

After another week, Sam and Cas returned from a supply run and I noticed that Cas had purchased a stack of books. No, not normal books, but pregnancy books. His favorite so far seemed to be "What to expect when you're expecting", which he would read until the middle of the night. He felt it necessary to quiz me on some of the physical symptoms an expecting mother might experience. He wanted to be sure that everything was completely normal and that I wasn't going to give birth to a goat headed abomination. No, those weren't his words, but mine. Basically he was on top of the world and the happiest I had seen him in... Well, ever actually. He was so elated that he didn't even notice how horribly Dean was treating him.

In between my puking my guts up and sleeping for ten hours a day, I tried to act as normal as possible. Dean had put summoning Crowley on hold for the moment, and it seemed that everyone around me was completely changing their lives just because I was pregnant. No, I wasn't happy about it. Why did things have to change that much?

When I woke up after the first week and it was the first morning I'd had that didn't result in me puking, I pulled myself out of bed and noticed that Cas was already awake. I already knew he was in the kitchen cooking again. He was making it a point to stuff me full of foods that had the required vitamins and caloric intake that I would need. He kept track of how much coffee and coke I drank as well to be certain I didn't drink too much caffeine. He made me take my prenatal vitamins, which for the record he had bought, not me. Basically he was the only one in the bunker that knew anything, and the rest of us were bumbling idiots. Especially me, seeing is that I was the one having the kid- You'd think I would have learned some of this stuff myself.

Something told me that Cas was living in la la land. I don't think he fully grasped the magnitude of what having a kid would bring. Sure, babies are cute, aww how adorable, but they aren't cute all of the time. When they're not screaming for hours on end, they're pooping, they're throwing up, or crawling around and getting into things they shouldn't and simply reeking havoc. I'm pretty sure Cas didn't understand that part of being a Father. He had no idea how much hard work it was going to be.

After brushing my teeth and my hair, I said screw getting dressed and stayed in my sweat pants and tank top and laggardly made my way to the kitchen. Just as I predicted Cas was standing over the stove and he was reading through the pages of a cookbook. Yeah, I'll say it, sometimes he could be so adorable.

"Morning." I said, making my way over to the coffee pot.

"Good morning, Lara. How are you feeling?"

"Peachy, finally for once I'm not hurling everywhere."

He gave me half a smile. "You know, it's actually a very positive sign if you experience morning sickness frequently. It means you're getting the HCG hormone that the fetus needs."

I blinked a few times over. "That's good to know. Well, then this kid is full of... _That_."

I reached for the cabinet where the coffee cups waited and Cas quickly grabbed my hand. "Sit down, Lara. I can get that for you."

"Cas," I snickered. "I can get my own coffee you know?"

"Of course. But, I want to do it."

Arguing with him did absolutely no good so I sat down. I figured this would last a few more weeks at the most, and then he would realize that I was still capable of doing all of the things I normally did when I wasn't pregnant. Well, almost everything. I couldn't exactly get into fights with monsters and get thrown across a room, or punched and kicked and shot at... But you know what I mean.

He prepared my cup of coffee and placed it in front of me, then went back to the stove. By this time Sam and Dean wandered their way into the room, Dean had clearly just woke up as well seeing is that the hair on the right side of his head was sticking straight up. Sam was already dressed and apparently had gone shopping for groceries and lied the bags on the table.

"Morning, kiddo-" Sam said, mussing my hair. "Hey Cas."

"Hello, Sam. Have you eaten breakfast? I'm sure there's enough for everyone. Although, it's a spinach omelet, I don't think Dean would appreciate it."

"That sounds disgusting-" Dean grunted, flopping down at the table, only then remembering that he was supposed to be mad at Cas. "You asshole..." He quickly added.

I kicked him roughly from under the table which forced him to grunt.

"Uh, no thanks, Cas-" Sam answered. "I ate earlier."

Cas only nodded and dished up a plate for me and before he sat it down went on to explain the benefits of everything. "The eggs have enough protein to last you until lunch time, the spinach of course has..."

"Cas-" Dean grumbled. "Just give her the friggin plate. You don't have to draw her a picture."

Cas squinted his eyes at him, but lied the plate down anyhow.

"Thank you." I smiled. No, I wasn't hungry in the slightest, especially for eggs and spinach, but how could I not eat it?

"You're welcome." He smiled. "I'm going to take a quick shower and get dressed. If you need anything I'm sure Sam will retrieve it for you, Lara."

Sam tore his eyes off the bag of groceries and fumbled. "Uh, yeah... Sure, no problem."

Once Cas left the kitchen Sam chuckled. "Wonder when he's gonna get over that?"

"Better be soon." Dean spoke before I could. "Before I beat the crap outa him."

"Why the hell are you being so mean, Dean?" I scowled. "You've been a butt hole for the last week."

"Yeah, well... I have a right. I'm the..."

"Don't say it's because you're the oldest. That's the stupidest excuse I've ever heard, and you're just being spiteful." I shoved a bite of omelet in my mouth and was surprised that it actually tasted pretty damn good.

"Lara's right-" Sam agreed. "You've been pretty rough on him, dude. Wanna explain why?"

"And here I thought that it was obvious." Dean pursed his lips. "It's Cas' fault that we're in this situation."

"What situation?" I retorted, crossing my arms over my chest.

"You being knocked up. It's his fault."

"Yeah, because clearly I had nothing to do with it. It's not like I have eggs that can be fertilized and all..."

"Shut up." He cringed.

"You're being unfair, Dean." I stood. "Stop acting like this is all about you. It has nothing to do with you. It's not your body, you're not the Father, you don't have to have anything to do with this kid, so why are you being such a bitch?"

"Because it's a mistake!" He stood now. "It's a stupid mistake and the both of you seem to think that it's just the best friggin thing in the world, when really, all it's gonna do is bring problems."

"Oh, I'm so sorry for ruining your life, Dean. Please, just sit here and I'll rush right out and get an abortion! Would that make you happy?!"

"Ok, guys." Sam stood and he grabbed me by the arm. "Lara, go get dressed or something, take a break."

I grabbed my plate and coffee and stomped out of the kitchen, going to the library and sitting at the long table there. I couldn't eat anymore, the nausea had returned with a vengeance, so I slid the plate away and rested my head in my hands.

Seriously, what the hell was wrong with Dean? Yeah, this was unexpected, but was it really that bad? He was acting as though it was the end of the world, that I was ruining their lives. If he was going to be like this for the next eight months... No, what if he acted like this even after the kid was born? He wouldn't that cruel would he? Somehow I could just see Dean acting like John and being hard on the kid, or completely ignoring it and treating it like crap. But it's not as if I could leave, move out and live somewhere else. This bunker was the safest place in the world for me to be. And this wasn't about me now anymore, I couldn't run out and leave just because Dean was pissing me off. I had this kid to consider now.

"Lara?" Cas said from behind me. "Are you alright?" I let out a sigh and didn't answer, so he sat down beside me, lying his hand on my back. "Is it morning sickness again? Do you need a dramamine?"

I pulled my face out of my hands and turned to him and wrapped my arms around him. He was confused of course but held me back.

Right at that moment I didn't know what to do. Hunting monsters and avoiding death every day seemed to be so much more simple than this. Funny how something as small as a kid could completely tare everything apart.


	13. Chapter 13

I watched Sam and Dean try to sneak their way down towards the dungeon of the bunker, really sometimes they could be so clunky with their footsteps a person one hundred miles away could hear them.

"Guys..." I said, and they skidded to a stop. "Whatcha doing?"

"Uh... Nothing?" Sam said, snickering. "Just... Researching."

"Uhuh, because that's clearly believable. Seriously, what are you doing?"

I noticed Dean was holding a plastic bag, one that held the ingredients for this supposed summoning spell.

"We... Thought we'd try to get Crowley trapped again." Dean answered, faking an innocent smile. "Just ya know, for insurance."

"Why exactly are you so eager to get him trapped here anyways?"

Dean stood up straight, looking to Sam who only shrugged.

"Well, before- It was because that limey mook don't need to be runnin around free, and we thought he'd know about whatever Gabriel might have been talkin about-" Dean started. "And now..."

"Now that you're pregnant we figured it might be better to..." Sam shrugged. "I dunno, make sure that he's in a safe place? So, he won't try anything?"

I crossed my arms. "Do you think he'd actually try to do something to me now?"

"Don't know-" Dean crinkled the plastic bag in his hand. "But he's Crowley, which means he's a dick. Might be that he'd find out about this kid and think it might, I dunno, give him some leverage."

They expected a fight out of me I suppose, but they weren't going to be getting one.

"Yeah, ok. I think that's a good idea then, but... What if it doesn't work?" I said.

"Then we'll just keep on trying, kiddo." Sam nodded and Dean descended the stairs into the dungeon. "There's gotta be some spell out there that could yank him here."

"Where's Cas?"

Sam snorted back a laugh. "I'm pretty sure he's in the kitchen... Cooking."

"Of course, where else would he be-" I rolled my eyes. "So you're doing this now?"

"No, there's a couple things on the list that we don't have. Something simple that's just a trip to a new-age shop of some kind. A particular crystal. Dean's gonna go and find it. We're just setting everything up."

"Ok, well... Keep up the good work." I gave him a sarcastic thumbs up and he descended the stairs next.

Sometimes I really thought my brothers didn't think things through. No, not because they wanted to summon Crowley here, but because they thought this spell would actually work. The thing is, is that there wasn't a way to cure demons until the late 50's, which meant, there wasn't any spells in existence that could yank a partially cured demon into a devils trap. There was no spell, because before that happened which really wasn't all that long ago, no one had ever even heard of such a thing- So how would such a spell even exist?

But, I wasn't going to say anything, because they were doing this to help me. And I appreciated it. I thought it was pointless, but I appreciated it none the less.

When I made my way to the kitchen Cas was, as usual, standing over the stove. Something was boiling in a big pot and the entire place practically was covered in steam.

"What's cookin?" I asked, and he quickly shoved the lid on the pot.

"I searched for a recipe of something that would be considered easy on a queasy stomach. Something favorable by women with morning sickness. It's a simple chicken soup recipe." He answered.

"Smells nice." I smiled, and he returned one. "Ya know, Cas- You really don't have to keep waiting on me hand and foot. I'm pregnant, I'm not dying."

"But I want to..."

"I know." I cut him off. "But, you're just going to ware yourself out. You're barely getting any sleep because you stay up all night reading your books, and then during the day you're constantly on the go either cooking, or cleaning or running errands into town. You need to take a break."

He set his wooden spoon down on the stove and turned to face me. "Lara... I told you before that I consider this child to be a miracle, that this was Gods way of telling me that he's forgiven me for the past. But that's not the only reason why I do these things. I do it because I want you to be healthy, and... I know nothing of being a Father, which means I need to practice, so to speak."

"Practice?"

He nodded. "In how to properly take care of someone. I know you're fully capable of doing things for yourself, but that doesn't matter to me. You're giving me something that I didn't even know I wanted until now. Which means, I don't want to fail with this, like I have with so many other things. I _can't _fail with this."

"So," I smirked. "I guess I should just sit down and shut up and stop telling you what to do?"

He thought about that for a moment. "Well, preferably I wouldn't want to say to sit down and _"shut up"_, but... Just let me take care of you."

I threw my arms up. "Ok, you win. I won't argue but only on one condition?" He nodded. "That you at least take a break every now and then, and get some friggin sleep. You're not supposed to lose sleep until after the kid is born, ya know?"

He smirked and agreed to that, and went back to stirring his soup. Dean and Sam entered the kitchen a short time later.

"I'm makin a run into town-" Dean announced. "Anyone need anything?"

"Dean, if you wouldn't mind- I'd like to go with you." Cas said. "I remembered there were some items I neglected to purchase the last time we went."

"Such as?" Finally it seemed that Cas noticed Deans frigid tone, but somehow he ignored it.

"A few things for Lara. More anti-nausea medication for one."

"I can grab that." Dean replied.

"I would rather do it, Dean. There were a few other things I needed as well."

Dean clenched his jaw and didn't look very happy, and really- Neither was I. Dean was being a major butt-boil lately and I was afraid that if he got Cas alone he might try to beat him up, or scream at him or something to that extreme.

"Yeah, ok, fine. Go get ready, I'm leaving in five minutes." He relented.

Cas turned the stove top down a few notches, mumbling slightly that the soup wouldn't be ready for another hour anyhow- And then left the kitchen.

"Dean-" I said, cringing at him. "You better be nice."

"Or what?"

"Or I'll lock you in the dungeon with Crowley and force you to listen to Backstreet Boys, while you braid each others hair."

He squinted at me. "Just mind your own business, sister."

Sam let out a raspy sigh. "Dean... Really, when are you gonna quit with this?"

Deans brows rose and he turned towards the door. "I'm not."

* * *

Dean had been driving for nearly fifteen minutes, his hands were gripping the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles were white. His jaw was clenched and his eyes lowered. Cas of course could see how Dean was reacting to having him in the car with him- He wasn't stupid, he knew he was angry with him, maybe even hated him now.

"Dean." He finally spoke. "I wish you would tell me why you're so angry."

Dean sneered, and it was actually a little frightening. "Really? You can't be that stupid, can you?"

"No. I understand that you're not happy about the situation, obviously you blame me. I suppose I just want to know why you're so unhappy with it. Will you tell me?"

Dean tapped his hands on the steering wheel, trying not to lose his temper, but he finally jerked the wheel and steered off to the side of the road and cut the engine.

"Ok, you wanna know why I'm so pissed?" He started and Cas nodded. "It's because you don't exactly have a good track record as far as being reliable goes. You take off, you do whatever the hell you want without thinkin of the consequences, and in the end you get people killed."

Cas swallowed hard. "And you think that I'll do the same thing now?"

Dean shrugged. "How are we to know? Say, one day, God himself shows up right in front of you. He tells you that he wants to give you your mojo back- Let you become an angel again... Would you take it?"

Cas stared blankly ahead. "Such a thing wouldn't happen, Dean."

"Work with me, man. I'm sayin what if? You never know, what if that happened? What if you could get your mojo back? You'd be a big time angel again, got your smiting powers back, your wings, everything. But that also means you wouldn't stick around like you do now. You'd blip away, do your thing in heaven and maybe pop in for a couple hours every now and then. Would you do that?"

"No, Dean." He answered quickly. "I wouldn't."

"So you'd actually turn down getting your mojo back?"

Cas gave half a smile. "I don't expect you to understand. And, had you asked me this question two years ago, or maybe even a year ago my answer might have been different."

"So now that Lara's knocked up you've suddenly changed your mind?"

"It's not only that." Cas turned in his seat to face him. "What is it that you're so afraid of?"

"You know..." Dean shook his head. "You're not reliable, man. You've ran out on us how many times now? Ran out on her? How do I not know that somethin might go down in the future and you flip your shit and go dark side again? Or, you can't handle what's happening and take off?"

Cas sighed, his eyes trailed off out the window and stared aimlessly at the road.

"I've made mistakes, Dean. I know that. I'm the first to admit it. And honestly, sometimes I question why I was even forgiven at all. But I'll tell you the same thing that I told Lara. I believe that this is Gods way of saying he forgives me. He's given me something wonderful as ways of showing it. You might consider this child to be an accident, or a mistake, but to me it's a miracle." He smiled. "I would never thinking of abandoning her or the child."

"You don't know _anything _about being a Dad, you don't know the first thing about kids."

"But I can learn?"

"You think it's that easy? Just pick up a book and read about it?" Dean sat back and huffed. "Look, all I'm gonna say is that we, Sammy, Lara and me- Our Dad wasn't exactly Father of the year, he was barely around and when he was it wasn't exactly a cake walk. So, what I'm gettin at is that if you even just _once _slip up- I'm gonna be there, and believe me, that won't be a cakewalk either. You follow?"

Cas nodded, but he wasn't threatened, in fact he wouldn't stop smiling. "I understand. But I can promise it won't come to that."

"Yeah, well. We'll see." Dean started the car and took off again.

Within another five minutes they were in town and starting for a convenience store, Dean dropped Cas off and he went on to find the as he called it, the hippy new-agey acid trip store where he could find his crystals. It didn't take long to find them, and after he paid and started for the door his phone started buzzing. After pulling it out and taking a quick glance, he saw it was from Sam.

"Hey." He said, stepping out onto the street.

"I'm takin Lara to the hospital, meet us there, now." Sam replied frantically.

"Wait, what? Why what's wrong?"

"I don't know. She's bleeding and having cramps, meet us there we're just pulling into the drive."

Sam hung up and Dean could only stand there a moment still holding his phone to his ear, and his stomach twisting. When he finally managed to pull himself to the car and start back towards the convenience mart where he left, Cas- He had already begun to panic.

Cas was waiting for him outside, standing on the corner with a bag in each hand. As soon as Dean pulled over and he opened the door and climbed in, Dean had to force the words out of his mouth.

"Sam's taking Lara to the hospital," He said, and Cas' face went blank. "Something's wrong."

Cas couldn't speak, he only dropped the bags he held to the seat and Dean sped off towards the hospital.

* * *

When they entered the ERs doors, Sam was sitting in the waiting area, he jumped to his feet when he spotted them.

"What's happened?" Cas asked. "Is she alright?"

"I don't know-" Sam shook his head. "She's been back there for about thirty minutes, no one has said anything to me yet."

"Well, when did this happen?" Cas went on. "She was fine this morning."

"I know, but... She started having pain and then she said she was bleeding. I don't know, man. We just need to sit and wait."

Cas only stared at the floor before moving to a seat and sitting. He kept his elbows on his knees and refused to remove his eyes from his feet. Sam and Dean went silent as well for the better part of an hour before Dean announced he was going to go grab some coffee from the vending machine. Sam sat down beside Cas and smacked him on the back.

"How you holdin up?"

Cas sighed, and shook his head. "I was just sitting here thinking of how foolish I was to believe that God could have actually blessed me. Why would he? After everything I've done I don't deserve to be happy. I see now that this is just another punishment, the ultimate punishment."

Sam sat back. "You can't think like that."

"I can understand punishing myself, it would make sense. But, why the child? He or she didn't do anything. How could someone be so cruel and punish me, by killing my child?"

"Cas, you don't know what's even happened yet. Lara and the baby could be fine."

Cas furrowed his brows. "Do you really believe that, Sam? Because I'm almost certain that this is just another form of punishment."

Sam couldn't deny that it very well end up badly, but he knew there was no convincing Cas that this wasn't gods way of fucking him over.

"These things happen-" Dean suddenly said beside him. "No rime or reason, sometimes it just happens. It don't mean you're being punished."

"I appreciate the sentiment, Dean." Cas stood. "But I would also appreciate if you wouldn't try humoring me."

He took a few steps away and stared aimlessly out the waiting room window.

After another hour, finally a doctor entered the room. She took a glance around and said.

"Lara Budrows family?"

Sam jumped up and nudged Cas and Dean. "Yeah, that's us."

She walked over and gave a small smile. "You can relax, everything is fine."

Cas let out a deep breath. "And the baby?"

"It's fine as well. It was just a little spotting, it's actually pretty normal for the first trimester. Most women don't realize that and I understand it can be scary. You did the right thing by bringing her in, just as precaution-" She pulled open a folder. "There were no issues with her blood-work, and ordinarily this early in the pregnancy we wouldn't be able to hear a babies heart beat, but I think this one wanted to make its presence known." She smiled. "The heartbeat was nice and strong."

Sam smiled and let out a relieved sigh, Dean was simply blank faced. No doubts that was because it wasn't exactly a normal pregnancy, or a normal baby. It was part seraphim, there was no way of knowing what could happen.

"That's good, really good." Sam said. "Uh, when can we take her home?"

"In a few hours. We just wanted to keep her for a little while longer just to be safe." She glanced from man to man. "Are one of you the Father?"

"I am." Cas stepped forward.

"Ok, then you'll probably want to come with me. We're going to give Lara her first ultrasound. Follow me."

Sam smacked Cas on the back and he practically flew out of the waiting room. Once he was gone Sam took a seat and brushed his hair from his face.

"Damn. Thank god, huh?" He said.

"Yeah..." Dean grumbled, sitting as well.

Sam immediately glared at him. "Dean, please don't tell me that you were actually hoping she'd lose this kid?"

Dean flattened his lips. "If you really think that then I'm gonna punch you in your fat mouth."

"Ok, enlighten me then? What the hell is your problem?"

Dean shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest. "This kid, Sammy. It's gonna grow up exactly like we did. Running, fighting, being afraid- It's not gonna be normal. It's gonna be just as fucked up as we are. How is that fair, huh? How is it fair that we're gonna screw up this kid so bad?"

"That's what this is about?" Sam retorted.

"Yeah, what kinda life is that for a kid? Hell, we were miserable growing up. Lara was miserable. This poor kid is gonna grow up a hunter, it's not fair."

Sam arched his brows. "Or... This is the best life possible for this kid. Yeah our family's not exactly perfect, but... We get by. We stick together. Think about it- This baby is basically gonna have three Dads. And not just normal everyday, drive your kid to little league practice Dads- We're hunters, which means we can protect it. It might not have a normal apple pie life, Dean- But it'll be safe, and it will grow up a hell of a lot better than we did."

Dean smirked slightly. "Maybe. It still sucks though. He won't be able to go to school, or have normal friends, I'm sure by the time he's five years old he'll be a friggin sharpshooter."

"So sure it's a boy already?" Sam snickered.

"Pretty much... Yeah, maybe you're right, Sammy. It ain't perfect but least he'll have his favorite uncle to watch his back."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Right. We'll just see who the favorite uncle is."

Dean jumped to his feet. "Well I've been given them both a hard time. And, uh, I'm not much for apologizing. Guess I should though, huh?"

"Wow, Dean. You're actually gonna admit to being wrong for once?"

"Shut up." Dean huffed.


	14. Chapter 14

Cas was staring at the ultrasound picture on the monitor in sheer amazement. Me? I wasn't entirely sure what I was looking at.

"Right here-" Cas said, pointing at the screen. "That small dot. That's it."

"It looks like a cashew." I stated, arching a brow. "You sure that's it?"

"Absolutely." The doctor smiled. "Within a few more weeks it will become more evident that it's a baby and not a peanut."

"And you're certain that everything is fine?" Cas asked.

"Appears to be." She flicked the screen off but printed up a picture and handed it to Cas. "You can hold onto that one, Daddy."

I snickered when Cas' eyes went wide. But he held onto that picture like it was the most priceless thing in the world.

"When can I go home?" I asked.

"We'll start getting your release forms ready- But just because you're going home doesn't mean you're off the hook. Just to be careful you need to take it easy for a few weeks. And try your best to make the environment as stress free as possible. That's on you, Dad." She patted Cas on the shoulder. "But I would say that everything is ok. Come back in a few weeks, you're going to need regular check ups of course."

She left the room and I sat up, covering my stomach with my ugly white hospital gown.

"Well, this day has sucked ass." I scowled.

Cas sat down beside me on the bed. "I'll admit that it has been unpleasant." He smiled. "But at least we know that everything is fine, and it was a false alarm."

I sighed and rubbed my face. "I'm sorry that I scared you."

"It wasn't your fault, Lara. Let's just be thankful that you're both fine."

Glancing up, I stared at the now black screen of the monitor. "So, I wonder how many more surprises we're gonna get from the little cashew."

He ignored that statement, and instead asked. "Have you been thinking of what to name the child, Lara?"

I arched a brow. "Uh, no. But clearly you have been or else you wouldn't have asked."

Shrugging, he gave a little smile. "I have been thinking about it, but I wasn't sure what you would prefer."

"It's kinda early to start thinking of names, isn't it? We don't even know what this kid is yet."

He tried to respond but the door creaked open and Sam and Dean walked in.

"Hey, kiddo." Sam smiled. "How're you feeling?"

"Just peachy, the cashew is trying to give me a heart attack."

"I stopped by the gift shop." Dean said, and I only then noticed he had his arms behind his back. "Picked up a little somethin."

He brought his arms out and I held back a laugh at an enormous stuffed rabbit, it was a little hard to notice how it was blue and not pink.

"That's a large rabbit." Cas said, tilting his head. "But, Dean- The color suggests it's for a male, and we aren't..."

"It's a boy." Dean scowled. "It's gotta be."

"Why?" I snickered. "Because you said so?"

"No, because Winchesters are always boys..." He paused and fumbled. "Well, except for you."

He sat the stuffed animal on my bedside table, giving me a wink afterwards.

"Well, thanks." I said, no not for the silly rabbit, but because Dean was finally acting like himself again. "I'm sure the kid will love it."

"Dean Junior-" Dean smirked. "Has a nice ring to it."

"Great-" Sam rolled his eyes and sat down. "He's gonna be unbearable now... Go back to being pissed off."

Dean only scowled at him, and thankfully I didn't have to wait around for long to be released.

* * *

In the weeks that followed things actually turned somewhat back to normal- At least in the sense that Dean wasn't trying to kill Cas with his eyes anymore, and had went back to treating him normally. Myself as well, even though we didn't really talk about the kid, he was finally treating me like his sister again and not the whore he wanted to brandish with a scarlet letter. It was amazing how that little thing could completely change my attitude. Yeah, I still had my moments of bitchiness, but overall I was finally starting to think that maybe this wouldn't be the biggest mistake in the world. Maybe, just maybe, we could all make this work.

For once I woke up before Cas could make me breakfast, but he had fallen asleep with an open book in his lap and partially propped up on his pillow, so he must have been reading until late... Again. But, honestly it was nice to get up and make my own breakfast for once. I knew Cas was trying to be helpful with all of the "nutritious" food he was making me, but the poor guy needed a break.

I was just sitting down at the table with my breakfast when Dean walked in, he took one look at me as I took a large bite of my sandwich and arched a brow.

"Uh... What the hell are you eating, dude?" He asked.

I chewed a few times over and said. "Peanut butter, jelly and doritos sandwich, why?"

He cringed slightly. "That's disgusting."

Sam came in seconds later, took one look at my sandwich and shook his head. "Morning." He said anyhow.

"Mhm-" I mumbled, taking another large bite. This quite possibly, was the best sandwich in the world.

I started counting down the seconds before Cas would come in next, and just as I figured he practically flew into the room- His hair was bed messed and he clearly had forgotten to put on pants. Dean took one look at him in his boxers and turned his head.

"Dude... Seriously? Put on some pants."

Cas didn't hear him as he stared at me. "Lara, what is that you're eating?"

I crunched into a dorito that had fallen off my sandwich. "What do you have super sonic hearing or something? Did you hear me chewing from the bedroom?"

He still looked exhausted but stumbled into the kitchen anyhow. "I would have made your breakfast, Lara... Why didn't you wake me?"

"Because you were tired, and I thought I'd give you a break-" I held up my half eaten sandwich. "I made my own, don't worry about it."

He leaned over and examined it carefully then squinted his eyes. "This doesn't have the necessary requirement of vitamins, Lara."

"Maybe not, but it tastes awesome."

"Dude, she's fine-" Dean huffed. "Let her have her disgusting sandwich. Chicks get weird cravings when they're knocked up, it's normal."

"Yes, Dean- I'm well aware that craving unusual food is normal for an expecting mother-" Cas replied, his eyes still squinty. "But regardless I still would have prepared it for her."

Dean only rolled his eyes and Sam had been clicking around on his phone ignoring our conversation.

"Uh, guys..." He sat up. "Apparently Garth texted me last night, about the job he took in Illinois."

"And?" Dean said.

"Turns out it wasn't a vamp case like you thought. It's somethin else, uh..." He paused and gave a subtle glance to Cas who was standing at the coffee pot. "It's a fallen angel thing."

Cas turned away from the counter and practically spilled his coffee. "Is he certain?"

"Seems to be... Garth thinks that they're the ones doin their own thing of monster hunting, or... Well, he's not too sure- But... It looks like they're tryin to get someones attention. They're leaving bodies out in the open with their eyes and insides liquified."

Cas sat down beside me, for a moment he wouldn't take his eyes off the table. "Generally they're more careful about what they do. Since they don't want to be discovered."

"Which is why Garth thinks they're sending out a message, or trying to get someones attention."

"Who?" Dean asked, placing his elbows on the table. "Whose attention would they want to get?"

"That's a stupid question-" I replied, pushing my empty plate aside. "Duh, it should be obvious they're trying to get to us."

Cas' furrowed his brows. "But, why? Since what happened they've wanted nothing to do with us."

"Good question-" Sam sighed. "So, what should we do about it guys? If we sit back, bodies will keep stackin up."

"Yeah and if we go it's most likely a friggin trap." Dean retorted.

"According to Garth, it doesn't seem to be that. He talked to one of them, said his name was Eremiel."

Cas sat up straight. "Eremiel?"

"Yeah, you know him?"

"It's been many centuries since we've spoken, but yes. During times of great distress he actually served in my former garrison."

"And?" I said. "What's this guy like? Is he a dick, or... Not a dick?"

"He was always fair, but that was in the past. Quite a lot has changed obviously. I'm certain that he wouldn't be pleased to see me face to face."

Dean tapped his coffee cup. "Ok, well- What did Garth say this dude wants?"

"To talk..." Sam shrugged. "He said he just wants to talk, about something important that could _drastically _alter all of our lives." Sam smirked. "Eremiels words, not mine."

Dean sat back and crossed his arms now, going silent.

"So are we going?" I asked.

"You're not in the _we_, baby-bump-" Dean answered. "You're not goin."

"Don't start this crap, Dean. I'm perfectly capable of riding in a friggin car."

"And if it's dangerous? What then?"

"I agree with Dean." Cas nodded. "It's too dangerous to risk it, Lara. You need to stay here where you'll be safe."

I sighed and rubbed my temples. "Seriously, don't start this crap or I will stab you in your eye sockets. Like I've said a billion times- I'm pregnant, I'm not dying! Don't start treating me like a fucking invalid, I can still do my damn job!"

When I pulled my face from my hands Sam and Dean were blank faced and Cas was only giving his usual goofy little smile.

"It's fine if you shout, Lara- It's normal for pregnant women to have violent mood swings." He said.

I glared at him. "I'm not having a mood swing, if I were having a mood swing- You'd know it." I pushed myself away from the table. "I'm going with you, if anything I can stay in the frickin motel room and research, so I'm not completely useless and you're not running off and ditching, me got it?"

"Yes, Ma'am." Sam snickered.

"I'm gonna go pack my crap."

"Well leave the attitude behind, sister- Dean grumbled. "I don't wanna be stuck in the car with it for the next few hours."

I left the kitchen and Cas followed, naturally, to help me pack. I grabbed my duffel bag and started stuffing things inside, barely even glancing at what I was packing long enough to tell if it was anything useful. Afterwards I started to change out of my sweats. After I tossed my shirt to the floor I noticed Cas staring at me with his head tilted for a moment. I was trying to decipher the look on his face when I realized his eyes were staring directly at my stomach. I glanced down long enough to notice my belly was barely starting to swell, just barely enough to even notice. How he spotted it at all, I didn't know- But it wouldn't have surprised me if he had actually been measuring me in my sleep.

I dunno what it was, if it was just seeing that ever so slight physical change in me, or the look on Cas' face- But I felt like I had just been hit with a truck. Suddenly it was all the more real that this was actually happening. It was easy to pretend it wasn't in between the moments of throwing up, sleeping and mood swings. But I guess I couldn't pretend any longer, or ignore it. Oh yeah, this was definitely happening, and the slight hump in my belly was proof all the more.

"Twelve weeks tomorrow-" I said, shrugging. "Guess it's getting to be about that time, huh?"

"Time?"

"That everything changes even more." I sighed.

He moved across the room and lied his hand on my stomach as if he might feel something, which wasn't possible. At least I didn't think so. Yeah, I was completely clueless about this kind of thing and it was pretty damn sad. Well since I suppose I was ready to fully acknowledge this then I was gonna have to start reading up. Cas couldn't be the only one in this flippin bunker that knew anything.

* * *

The drive was long, and I knew I was ticking Dean off with having to stop every twenty minutes to take a piss- By the time we got into town and pulled into the drive of a motel, I'm pretty sure Dean was about ready to punch me in the face, well... Not really, but ya know what I mean. He got us a room and we set everything up inside.

"Call Garth up-" Dean said. "Find out what we're supposed to do."

Sam was on it and dialed, it rang probably three times before he picked up. I didn't listen to his convo much because I was busy clicking around on the laptop checking out the files Sam saved on the bodies left behind. This angel, or angels, however were many here in this town- Had certainly left these bodies behind as a message. The way they were positioned was far from normal, not to mention their insides being melted. Whether they had been demons before hand, or just innocent people, I didn't know.

"Got it." Sam said, then hung up. "Ok, so- Here's the deal. Garth said that Eremiel wants to meet us in an undisclosed location... Undisclosed meaning only Garth knows how to get to it. He's on his way here to pick us up."

"Awesome." Dean flopped down on the edge of the bed. "Why all the secrecy?" He looked to Castiel now. "Cas? Theories?"

"He's being cautious I would suspect. Perhaps whatever information he has for us is something that really is important, and he's taking a risk by alerting us. Eremiel might be in hiding, possibly running from one location to the next to avoid being captured." He passed a glance to me. "It's going to be dangerous, more then likely. Lara should remain here."

I squinted my eyes at him for once. "I guess I don't get a say in the matter, huh?"

"Nope-" Dean stood. "Preggo stays behind."

Cas smiled at me. "It will be fine, Lara."

Oh sure, easy for him to say. Yeah, yeah I knew that I couldn't go charging into dangerous situations anymore, but still... I hated being left out. I wanted to be there to watch my boys backs, not stay held up in the motel room all comfy and cozy while they could be getting hacked at.

It didn't take long for Garths ranchero to pull into the drive- I watched from the window as he moved to our door and knocked.

Sam opened it and Garth stepped in, immediately giving Sam a hug. "Long time no see, guys." He said, grinning then turned to me. "Hola amiga, look at you girl, you look great."

"Hey, Garth." I stood and he gave me a tight hug which made Cas flinch.

"Um, excuse me, Garth-" He said tapping him on the shoulder. "But, Lara's pregnant I don't think it's safe to squeeze her so tightly."

Garth pulled away, his eyes went wide. "Wait a second... You're pregnant?" I nodded awkwardly. "That's the best news I've heard in... Well for a while now." His eyes went teary. "I'm gonna be an uncle!"

"Hey, wait a second there, chuckles-" Dean wagged his finger at him. "You ain't family."

"Dean, don't be a butt-" I retorted.

Garth let the comment slide. "Soo. Stupid question but I'm guessin Cas is the Dad?"

Cas nodded, smiling again. "I am."

Garth grabbed Cas now and gave him a hug and Cas only stared at me uncomfortably from over his shoulder. "Congrats, man. So, when's the wedding?"

"Uh..." Cas garbled.

"There isn't gonna be a wedding, Garth-" I said. "This isn't the 50's."

"Ok, enough of this." Dean said waving his arms. "So, where's this angel held up, huh?"

Garth pulled away leaving Cas startled and fidgeting. "Well, can't tell ya where, I just gotta take you there. Those are the rules, anyways. Eremiel was pretty adamant about that."

"Before we go-" Sam said. "Are you sure that this isn't some kind of trap?"

Garth shrugged. "Don't know, man- I can't really read angels. But, from what I could tell he seemed anxious, pretty damn depressed there too- He said he's been hidin, and whatever info he's got is big... Like, save the world big."

We all exchanged glances. "Ok then." Dean sighed. "Guess we should get this over with. Everyone make sure you got your angel blades on hand, just in case this is a set up."

I watched with a scowl as they readied their things and started for the door.

"Just sit tight there, kiddo-" Sam smiled. "We'll be back soon."

My scowl only intensified as everyone left but Cas, he waited until they were in the car before turning to me. "Everything will be fine. I promise."

He leaned over and kissed my forehead. "Be careful, don't turn your back on him, Cas. I know sometimes you can be naive when it comes to the angels... Don't do that this time."

He nodded. "I know. Things are different now. I'm not so quick to assume that they're still my siblings. You're my family now, so- I'll do what I need to do."

I tried to give a weak smile in return as he left the motel now and joined my brothers. I watched from the window as Garth led the way and they disappeared.

* * *

They followed Garth to the other edge of town, a forty minute drive, and into the cracked and busted parking lot of a large abandoned brick building. Once Garth pulled his car to a stop he climbed out of the drivers seat and waited.

Dean and Sam reached him first, followed by Cas pulling up the rear.

"This is the place." Garth stated. "Eremiel said he'll be waitin for you guys inside."

"You're not going in?" Dean asked.

"No, I can't. He said I can't know whatever this information is, Dean. He said just the three of you go in, or well, four, but since Lara couldn't..."

"Yeah we get it." Dean interrupted. "Ok, well. Let's go."

They started towards a door that was already standing open. Inside they found a large open space that was blank but for shattered glass and splintered pieces of wood. The sunlight poured in through the windows lining towards the ceiling, but still the atmosphere wasn't anything but unsettling. When they stopped in the middle of the massive room, each man took a turn at examining practically every inch of the area.

"I'm glad you could make it." A voice rang out from behind them.

They each swung around and Castiel was the first to step forward. "Eremiel?"

"Hello, brother." He smiled. "It's been a long time." He cocked his head to the side and examined Cas from head to toe with dark chocolate eyes. "Strange... It's strange seeing you as nothing but your vessel. You'll have to explain to me later what it's like being human."

Sam and Dean examined him closely, noticing right off that he didn't fit the description that Garth had given. He claimed he had been running and hiding, that he was depressed... The man standing before them right now certainly didn't appear that way. He was dressed in a nice suit, and compared to other angels they had met who really had been in hiding, he was surprisingly clean.

"I think you should get to why you wanted to speak with us." Sam said. "No reason to beat around the bush, is there?"

"Possibly not." He reached into the small pocket of his vest, pulling out a gold pocket watch, after checking the time he clicked it closed and smiled. "Funny thing about being here on earth for the first time in thousands of years, we and I mean the angels, in case you can't follow, were trying to find a way of getting back upstairs. Little did we know that all of this, everything that happened, Castiel rebelling, befriending the Winchesters- The events leading up to us being cast out... Was all prophecized about."

"What?" Castiel squinted his eyes. "What do you mean it was prophecized about?"

"Our Father, he... Has an unusual way of going about things. Instead of just fixing things himself he prefers to let it play out, so he can sit back and watch and not get his hands dirty. Sure, he writes the prophecies, makes certain that they ensue the way he wants, but... Other than that he doesn't much care for what happens."

"Wait a second..." Sam snickered slightly. "So, you're saying that everything we've done, and Cas joining in with us, the choices he made that got you cast out was something God wanted to happen?"

Eremiel shrugged. "Yeah, well... It was all a matter of time really. Once God left heaven he knew it would be anarchy up there. The archangels were pompous little bastards and were nothing but trouble but at least with Michael still there taking charge it wasn't like it was afterwards. God knew about all of it, he knew about the wars, his archangels getting their asses smote, and eventually Castiel playing God himself. Everything played out as it should."

"How so?" Dean asked now. "What's the point of tellin us this now?"

"Because things are still playing out as they should, apparently. There's more to all of this then you know. Honestly, we're trying to understand why God just doesn't do all of this himself instead of sitting back on the sidelines and letting others get their hands dirty."

"You're not making any sense, Eremiel." Cas said. "What is this information you wanted to give us?"

He smiled, forcing creases to form around his eyes- Yet again he checked his pocket watch, staring at the hand ticking before nodding.

"Should be enough time-" He closed the watch a second time. "In answer to your question, you played a much bigger part in this prophecy than you know, Castiel. Haven't you ever sat back and thought about why it was from the beginning you and the Winchesters seemed to hit it off?" When Cas only shifted his eyes in confusion he went on. "It was to get to her... Their sister, which I _wasn't_ surprised to see you didn't bring with you... Think about it, Castiel. God doesn't let things happen unless he wants them to, which means- He wouldn't have allowed the Seraphim to be eradicated unless it was for a greater purpose. It was to throw us all off." He threw his arms up in the air. "He almost did, I mean... For centuries we had no idea that there were any of them left. But, Sauriel survived, at least long enough to birth one child... And now... That child is grown, and going to have... Yours."

"I don't understand..." Cas said, beginning to panic. "What does this have to do with anything?"

"The child Lara is carrying... Is the key to all of this. He, or she, is going to be the one that begins a new era, the one to fix everything gone wrong upstairs. Not only that but, since it will be part Seraphim, it's going to cause many problems for particular angels that it'll pass judgement on. Seraphims were considered Purifiers after all, they cleanse away the sinful and evil with fire. That bodes a problem for us... There's no way of knowing which one the little bastard will smite."

Dean had to latch on to Cas' arm to keep him from lunging at the man. "Ok, and you're telling us this why?" Dean snapped.

Eremiel smiled. "It was a long drive here, wasn't it? Forty minutes, and we've been standing here talking for a good fifteen... By now they should have gotten the job done, so... I'll just say, Castiel. I'm sorry for your loss, but- There's no way in creation we would let that child be born."

"What?" Cas' face went pale. "What have you done?"

"We've gotten rid of a threat, and eliminating the chance of another threat being conceived. Go ahead, drive back, but... You're too late."

Eremiel gave another smile before _somehow _zapping away.

"Go, go go!" Sam shouted and they took off running from the building.

When they reached the car Garth was practically shoved aside. "What's goin on, guys?"

No one answered as they climbed in the car, Castiel in the front seat for once as Dean peeled out of the drive.

"Someone try calling her!" Dean screamed, and Cas pulled his cell and dialed.

It rang and rang until reaching voice mail. "She's not answering!"

"Keep trying... Dammit... We should have known this would happen!"

"Just drive, Dean-" Sam dialed now and listened as it switched to voice mail. "Still no answer, can't you go any faster?"

"I'm trying!" Dean floored it and tried not to think about what they thought they would find back at the motel.


	15. Chapter 15

When I noticed someone standing in the room, my eyes immediately went to the door which I had forgotten to lock. Whoever this man was, I had never seen him before. It didn't matter though, I could see his true face underneath the vessel he wore... He was an angel.

He looked gruff, with a light beard, a faded jean jacket and torn t-shirt.

"Who the hell are you?" I asked, backing into the wall slightly.

"Name's not important." He said, and an angel blade slid out of his sleeve. "I suggest you don't struggle, just let me get this over with quickly."

Oh shit... What the hell was this. "Wait a second." I said, holding up my hands. "I don't know what your beef is with me, but I haven't done anything to you."

"Not yet, but you will, and I have my orders." He stepped closer and I glanced to my duffel bag where my angel blade waited. "You're unarmed, I'm not... There's no use in fighting against me."

He suddenly lunged at me and we both smashed to the wall, I struggled to push his hand away that held the angel blade, but he was stronger than me obviously. I slid to the left just in time to avoid being stabbed straight in the throat, instead the tip of the blade became imbedded in the wall. He quickly pulled it free and came at me again, I started throwing everything I could get my hands on at him starting with a bedside lamp. It smashed against his face, and after being momentarily startled he came at me again.

We collided a second time and rolled over the bed and crashed to the floor. He swatted at me with the knife as I continued to try and hold him off, but he managed to cut a gash in my upper right arm. Somehow I ignored it as he started slapping me, I suppose he didn't figure I'd put up this much of a fight and he would need to knock me out in order to get the job done.

Somehow I managed to kick him enough that he rolled off and I tried to make a run for it, but of course I didn't make it before he grabbed me and slammed me against the wall a second time. My forehead was smashed against it to the point I was seeing stars, and I reached for the first thing that could be used as a weapon, which was a broken piece of glass from the busted lamp. I jammed with with such a force into his eye it actually sliced open my palm, and he stumbled backwards just long enough for me to grab his angel blade and jam it into his chest.

With a loud shriek and burst of white light he slumped to the floor.

I tried not to pass out as I crawled to the bathroom and locked myself inside, drawing a warding sigil on the door with blood from my cut arm before falling backwards against the bath tub.

Passing out wasn't an option right now, so I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around my arm to stop the bleeding. I could hear my phone buzzing like crazy from the bedroom- But couldn't risk going back out there to get it. At least with the sigil on the bathroom door they couldn't get inside. For the moment it was the safest place for me to be.

What the hell happened? Why did this angel attack me? My mind could conjure up no explanation and I felt myself slumping over.

"No, no no." I said to myself. "Stay awake, don't go under."

My forehead was busted enough that a trickle of blood was running down my cheek. Chances were I had a concussion, but hell, when did I not have one? It wouldn't be my first.

My phone continued to buzz for the next ten minutes until suddenly stopping. When I heard a gallop of footfalls outside the door first thoughts were more angels had come to finish the job.

"Lara?" I heard Cas call out, then the doorknob started to wiggle. "Lara, can you hear me?"

Ok, I could pass out now, but I garbled out some sort of answer before my eyes started to close.

I could hear pounding on the door before it was busted open and all three of them rushed inside. Cas reached me first, as he usually did, and pulled me into sitting position.

"Where are your injuries?" He asked, frantically searching me from head to toe.

"Bring her in here." I heard Dean say as someone scooped me up and carried me in the bedroom.

I opened my eyes enough to see Sam going around the room and drawing sigils on the walls and windows with a marker, as Dean grabbed the med-kit. Cas, was applying pressure to the wound on my arm while simultaneously blotting my forehead.

"I'm ok," I blabbered. "It's nothing serious."

"Yeah, you let us be the judge of that, kid." Dean said. "What happened?"

"I don't know..." I sat up slightly. "This... asshole just shows up... Angel, said he had orders to kill me."

Dean looked down at the body on the floor. "Did he say anything else?"

I shook my head. "N-no.. That's all."

"The cut isn't too deep." Cas said, then glanced over his shoulder at Dean. "But it will need a few stitches."

"Can you handle that? Or do you want me to do it?"

"No-" Cas had already started going through the med kit. "I can do it."

"Someone wanna explain to me what happened?" I asked, feeling a little more coherent now.

"It was a set up." Sam answered, finishing with his art work. "Eremiel was only distracting us while his buddy came after you."

"But why?"

Cas cinched his lips and glared at my brothers as though he didn't want them to answer.

"Cause of the kid." Dean said anyhow. "Some bullshit about a prophecy and the kid growin up to start nukin the angels... Don't worry, it's all crap."

"Right-" I snorted. "It's crap and yet they come and try to assassinate me?"

"Try to stay calm, Lara-" Cas said. "You were injured, you need to rest."

"What the hell is going on?" I mumbled. "Is this it? Is this what Gabriel was talking about?"

Everyone fell silent as they gazed at one another.

"Seems like it, don't it?" Dean sighed. "Woulda been nice if the dick-hole could have told us the angels would actually try to kill you."

"He did say that half of the angels wouldn't be happy about what's gonna happen." Sam added. "Guess we never would have considered Lara being pregnant was actually this world shattering event."

"So-" I forced myself to sit up. "This kid is supposed to nuke the angels?"

"According to what Eremiel said, yes-" Cas answered. "He claimed this child was going to bring a new era and start passing judgement against the fallen angels."

"Oh, and apparently-" Dean went on. "Cas teamin up with us, you and him, everything that happened in the past God knew about. It was all a part of some sort of prophecy."

"He knew about everything?" For the moment I couldn't feel the pain of my injuries any longer. "Everything?"

"Yes-" Cas sighed. "Eremiel said that God knew I would fall, that I would attempt to become the new god, and that I would be the cause of the angels being expelled from heaven. All of it was leading up to this point." His eyes fell to my stomach. "It was leading up to this child being born."

Now I swung my legs over the edge of the bed. "Ok, so wait a second. Cas, remember what you told me in purgatory? That God wanted me to be born for a reason... Was this it?"

Dean and Sam exchanged looks, confused. I had never told them about that conversation between Cas and I.

"I don't know. I wish I did, but- I'm just as confused as you are."

Now I stood. "Let's get outa here. I want to go home."

* * *

No one spoke. No one uttered a single word for the better part of an hour. We had gotten back to the bunker earlier that day and still, it was nothing but silence. But, it didn't matter. I was certain we were all thinking the same thing.

When the hell were we ever going to catch a friggin break? Really, it was always something. Always some sort of chaos going on in our lives. But never, ever did I think that my kid would have something to do with it. No, I wouldn't allow this to happen. Fucking with me is one thing, but fucking with a child who wasn't even born yet? No, no way. I wouldn't let my child grow up to be used as an angel smiting weapon. Even if it meant completely vanishing off the face of the earth, living on some remote island eating friggin coconuts, going crazy and talking to volley balls named Wilson, I would do it. This kid was not going to grow up to become a tool.

My eyes hadn't left the table in the library, and the boys didn't seem eager to speak just yet either. Cas especially. His face had been a combination of distress and complete misery since we left the motel and started on the drive back. But each of us were interrupted from our deafening silence when there was a sudden knock on the bunker door.

It echoed down to where we sat and Dean immediately sat up.

"Uh..." He garbled. "Who the hell is that?"

Sams brows furrowed. "Good question."

He stood and pulled his gun from his pants and both he and Dean started for the stairs that led up to the door. Cas and I followed but stayed down below and watched as they approached and Dean fidgeted slightly before saying.

"Who is it?"

Sam sighed at him and shook his head. "You're actually asking who it is?" He whispered.

Dean shrugged, giving half a smile. "Might as well, huh?"

"Open the bloody door." A voice rang out from the outside.

Instantly I went stiff and latched onto Cas' arm. "Is that Lee?"

Dean wasn't eager to open the door but did anyhow, and sure enough Lee waltzed in. For a moment I didn't even recognize him. He had lost his signature overcoat, and his blonde waves had been cut short. He was dressed in a plain blue button up shirt, with a white t-shirt underneath and dark washed jeans.

"What the hell?" Dean had the sense to say first. "What are you doing here?"

"Yes, it's lovely to see you as well, Dean." Lee said, starting for the stairs and stopping in front of me. "Well, Lara. Anything you want to share?"

"Where the hell have you been?!" I snapped instead of answering. "I thought you were dead! You just completely friggin disappeared after I went to purgatory, what the fuck?"

He blinked a few times over, not looking the slightest bit amused. "After the angels fell and heaven was locked, I had no choice but to go into hiding down here. You know, I can't exactly smite anything anymore and there are quite a few angels with sticks up their asses when it concerns me." He eyed Cas now. "Castiel. I see you're holding up rather well, considering."

It had been a long time indeed since I had seen Cas give Lee such horrible death stares.

"Why are you here?" He asked.

"We need to talk." Lee replied, waltzing past us and moving into the library.

"Just who is we?" Sam asked.

"All of us-" Lee sat down, and for once he actually looked exhausted. "I would have come sooner, but I don't exactly have wings any longer and I had to take a god damned bus. How humiliating is that?"

"Yeah- My heart breaks for ya-" Dean snapped back. "Ever hear of picking up a friggin phone?"

"Not now, Dean." I said, nudging him. "So what do you need to talk about?"

"You, and the child you're carrying." He replied, then smirked when he noticed my expression. "Of course I've heard about it, Lara. All of the angels have by this point. This is front page news right there in big bold print. The story of the century."

"So, I take it-" Sam shrugged. "That Gabriel wasn't lying when he said this was fate of the world big?"

"More or less." Lee kicked his feet atop the table and made himself more comfortable.

I sat now and Cas quickly sat beside me. "Ok, so talk. Tell us everything we need to know."

"First of all-" Lee held up his finger. "Let me say that this was supposed to happen a long time ago. But it seems the two of you-" He glared at Cas and me. "Didn't know how to get into each others knickers back then. Technically, this was supposed to happen when Castiel was still an angel."

Cas of course rose up on the defense. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that you should have slept with her when you were still an angel, honestly I don't know what's wrong with you. But I suppose God never planned on Naomi and her schemes. You were supposed to stay together after Lara got you out of purgatory, but... Whatever, that doesn't matter now. The point is, is that this child was supposed to be part angel, and part seraphim, which of course would make it ridiculously powerful. But, after you walked off into that lake after the whole leviathan fiasco, God asked me to improvise."

"Wait a second..." Deans face fell flat. "What do you mean by improvising?"

Lee arched a brow, staring to each of us. "You mean... Lara didn't tell you lot?"

"Tell us what?" Sam snapped.

"I gave her my powers-" After he said that the blood drained from my face, which he obviously noticed. "Oh, my apologizes. Apparently I wasn't supposed to tell you that."

Now everyone gaped at me. "Lara?" Cas asked first. "Is that true?"

I shook my head. "Unfortunately."

His brows scrunched. "Why didn't you tell me that before?"

"Have your marital squabbles later." Lee interrupted. "There are more pressing issues at hand right now."

"So you gave her your powers to what? Replace the fact that Cas is no longer an angel?" Sam asked.

"It's not as potent as mixing angel and seraphim blood together, but it will do. It's still far more powerful than the angels trapped here on earth. Anyhow, let me get to the point. I'm here because as usual, all of you are in danger. This child is going to be hunted, and not just by a hoard of angry angels- But by demons as well. Believe me, no one is exactly eager for this child to be born."

"And you're here, why?" Cas asked. "You're useless, you have no power. It's not as though you could offer any assistance."

I could tell that tickled him to actually say that out loud.

"I'm here to school all of you of what's going to come in the future. You think that the danger you're all in during the months Lara is pregnant will just magically disappear once the child is born? No. It will be a constant threat, it will never stop- At least until the child is old enough to start doing his or her work, and even then it will still be in danger. Yes, it might be powerful but that doesn't mean there still won't be a few dumb souls out there that will try to end its life."

Cas looked to me, and I could tell he was trying to stay calm for my sake. "What do we need to do?"

"As soon as this child is old enough to start training that's what must be done. His work will begin immediately, and there won't be any time to waste."

Dean leaned against the table, resting his palms down and getting in Lees face. "Are you tryin to say that this is this kids, what, destiny?"

"Of course it is. That was the sole purpose this child was even thought to be born. The reason why Castiel and Lara were pretty much shoved together in the first place. It was all leading up to this very moment, and once the child's born, finally the new era can begin."

Everyone fell silent, and I glanced from man to man. Their expression were all basically the same. Complete and utter horror, so of course they were confused when I suddenly began to burst out laughing. By the time an entire minute passed I was practically in tears from laughing so hard.

"I fail to see what's so amusing about all of this, Lara." Lee said, scowling.

"Not to dampen your sudden good mood-" Dean added. "But I kinda gotta agree with the douche bag on this one. What's so damn funny?"

I tried to stop the laughter, because by now my sides were aching.

"I'm sorry-" I snorted. "But... God is completely screwed."

"Excuse me?" Lee replied.

"God is screwed!" I looked to Cas, then Sam and Dean. "This kid is part Winchester, when have the Winchesters ever done what they were "destined" to do? When have they ever played by the rules? Never. Not to mention that this kids Father, is a former angel who also, never did what he was supposed to do." Cas' brows scrunched. "If God wanted to have an obedient little solider than he should have found someone else to pop out this kid. Because he made a hell of a mistake picking the two of us. It's hilarious."

Dean stood up straight and shrugged. "She kinda has a point."

"This kid isn't going to do what God wants." I went on. "I already know that. This is team free will here, we're all about setting our own course of actions. So, Lee, I'm sorry, but... I'm afraid God is gonna be pretty disappointed."

Lee scowled, and it was the first I had ever seen him look truly angry. "You think this is something you can shirk away?"

"We didn't start this prophecy." Cas defended. "As this childs Father, I can say with a certainty that I'm not going to allow its life to be filled with nothing but fighting and being used as I had been. It's not a hammer-" He glanced to Dean after that statement and he only smirked. "Its life will be whatever he chooses it to be."

Lee snickered. "You daft little monkeys actually believe that, don't you? This isn't something that can be tossed away only because you claim to have free will. Do you know how long we've waited for this? The entire seraphim race was completely wiped out, all except for you-" He glared at me. "Because this was meant to happen."

"Tough." I stood. "I didn't ask to be a part of this, and neither did this child. If God wants something taken care of then he can get off his lazy ass and do it himself. He needs to stop hiding like a coward and step up and take care of his own bratty little freaks and not rely on some innocent kid to do the job for him! Take that message to your Daddy, Lee. I'm done."

He narrowed his eyes and pulled himself to his feet. "You think it's that simple do you? That you can just say no and suddenly everything will be well and fine? Why is it so difficult for you to grasp that if this child doesn't step up and do its job, then this world will be doomed! That little bastard is the only one capable of setting things right! And you..."

His words cut off when Cas lunged at him and flattened him to his back. He managed to get a few good punches in on his face before Sam and Dean pulled him away.

"Calm down!" Dean snapped. "Now's not the time for that, man!"

Lee pulled himself back to his feet and wiped the blood from his busted nose. "Temper temper, Castiel. That's not very fatherly behavior."

"Shut up." Sam said now. "Just shut up, you're not helping."

"Listen-" I spoke. "I don't really feel like sitting here and fighting with you over this, Lee. So if you're only going to cause trouble then just leave. You gave us your message, why are you still here?"

He took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down. "Because like it or not, I've been ordered to help you."

"We don't want your help." Cas spat. "We don't want _anything _from you."

"Clearly, and I don't exactly want to risk my ass for you lot anymore either. Especially since you're not going to cooperate."

Dean smiled. "That shouldn't be a big surprise, asshole. When have we ever done that?"

Lees expression finally softened and he actually gave a chuckle. "Lara you asked why god would choose this to happen with you? Often I've asked myself that very question, but I believe the answer to that is because, like with so many other things, god doesn't want things to go according to plan. Sure, it would be easy enough for him to step up snap his fingers and fix all that needed to be fixed, but... That's too simple. Rather he chooses to set things into motion and sit back and watch how it all plays out. Who knows, maybe he knew all along that this wouldn't be easy. Maybe this was his intention all along."

"What kind of sense does that make?" Sam huffed. "To have some foretold prophecy and then not care how it all turns out?"

"The apocalypse didn't go according to plan, did it? No. Because you and your idiot brother changed it all. And things ended up better. Lucifer was put back where he belongs and the world was spared. Maybe..." He sighed. "Maybe this is another situation like that. Yes, the child was supposed to be born but maybe he never intended for that child to be used. Maybe he instead wants a different sort of ending. One that wouldn't end with more than half of his children being decimated. As difficult as it is for me to admit, all of you have the tendencies to surprise me by the things you've managed to do. Perhaps this will be another of those instances."

Well at least no one was throwing punches anymore, and Cas finally seemed to be calming down.

"Even if that is Gods plan-" Dean said. "That don't erase the fact that we're still screwed. Almost all the angels out there want this kid dead, the demons I don't even wanna know why those sons a bitches want it. There's seven months left til this kid is born. What are we supposed to do?"

Lee snickered. "Well the best thing would be for Lara to remain here in the bunker, but since I know that won't happen I would suggest avoiding situations where angels and demons are involved. You know what to watch for, so use your heads. Stay away from them... At least the ones that want to kill Lara." He shrugged. "And of course I would advise finding those that are actually on your side. Build yourself an army, because you're going to need it."

"An army?" Sams face went blank. "You're serious?"

"Deadly." Lees face hardened. "You're going to need all the help you can get."

"And how are we to find the angels who are actually on our side?" Cas asked. "There's so few of them, and they've been hiding since they were expelled."

"There's more than you think, it's all a matter of sniffing them out. You know Gabriel is with you, although he's not much for fighting these days. There are others, some you know, some you don't." He glanced at the blood splatter on his shirt before continuing. "As far as finding them- Castiel you should know what to look for. Look for their signs."

Dean crossed his arms. "Ok and say we find this army, what the hell are we supposed to do after that?"

Lee blinked a few times over. "Prepare for the war, because it's going to get messy."

Sams face went blank. "So you mean an actual war?"

"Like standing in an open field staring at the other side of soldiers who're waiting to tare our friggin heads off kinda war?" Dean added.

Lee nodded. "You've never had to deal with something like this before, correct?"

"Which is what Gabriel stated-" Cas shook his head. "He said that it would be something we've never faced before. Although, I don't think I was meant to fit into that observation. I've been in hundreds of battles."

"Not as a human, and definitely not defending your kid." I said, shuddering. "So yeah, technically he meant you too." I felt sick. "I think I need to, uh... Go throw up."

I quickly rushed from the library and locked myself in my room. Ok, so. My spell deteriorating didn't seem that bad now, how could I have bitched and complained about that for so long when something like this was in store for us? We were beyond screwed this time.

* * *

Lara had refused to open the door no matter how much Castiel knocked, and after a few quiet words shared through it he let out a sigh and returned to the library. Lee, unfortunately was still there, so he had no choice but to sit across from him as they resumed with their threatening death stares.

Sam had already began to search for any signs of angels. Ones that didn't result in multiple deaths or massive explosions. He was searching for any so called "miracles" maybe the ill who had been healed, or any other form of aid they could provide. So far, he hadn't found anything. But he knew it would take longer than a couple of hours to get it done.

Dean was merely sitting at the table with his arms crossed, staring off at nothing.

"I don't suppose anyone would like conversation?" Lee asked sarcastically. "Or, maybe questions? Seeing is that I'm here for now you might as well take advantage of it."

"Why bother?" Sam replied. "No matter what we'd ask you'd refuse to answer, or- You would give us some smart ass comment instead."

"Perhaps not. You could always try." Lee smiled.

"Ok, I'll bite-" Dean said, sitting up. "Why are you still here? Pretty sure Lara made it clear she didn't want you here. And I think I can vouch for the rest of us that we don't want you here either." Deans lips pursed. "So, that makes me think that maybe there's somethin you're not telling us."

"I'm sure you could be right. There's probably multiple things that I haven't told you." Now Lee sat up. "So ask a god damned question and we'll see what happens."

Cas flicked his eyes upwards to meet Lees. "How much time does Lara have left? It's been over the five year mark and still her spell is intact. How long until it's dissolved completely?"

For a moment Lee looked confused as he sat back with a snicker. When he realized that Castiel was completely serious, and that Sam and Dean seemed eager to hear the answer to that as well his smile faded.

"You're serious?" He looked from man to man. "You don't know already?"

"Know what?" Sam scowled.

"Laras spell dissolved ages ago, shortly after the angels were expelled from heaven."

Silence filled the large room for the better part of thirty seconds before Dean finally spoke.

"That's not possible. We woulda known. You're lying."

Lee cocked his head to the side. "How would you have known? You're human, so is Sam- And Castiel had lost his grace by that time so he wouldn't have been able to notice it. So really, how would you have known?"

Cas' eyes shifted back and forth until he pushed himself to his feet. "This isn't possible. I agree with Dean. We would have known. There was absolutely no evidence that the spell is gone."

"There were no signs-" Lee sighed. "And when I had given Lara my powers, I also gave her the knowledge on how to control her abilities. So after the spell dissolved she subconsciously knew how to keep them from exploding. And, these years that's passed it's been the same thing. She's hadn't a reason to use them so it's as though she's been the same as in the past. You still believed her to be human, so did anyone else she might have come in contact with. So really, how would you have known?"

"So, wait-" Sam shoved his laptop aside. "Since it dissolved after the angels fell, does that mean she still has her wings?"

Lee nodded. "Of course."

"And no angels would have been able to see that?" Dean looked skeptical. "Cause we sure as hell have run into a few in the past, and they didn't say anything about them. Pretty sure six wings would cause some friggin attention."

"Well it's not as simple as that. Here on earth our wings are only visible when we're using our abilities. So unless she was smiting said angels at the time, they wouldn't have noticed."

Cas' brows scrunched. "That is true, I couldn't see Lees either until he burnt something- And the moment in Rufus' cabin when Lara burned Hester, I could see her wings then."

"Awesome- Just awesome." Dean shook his head. "Well, we can't tell Lara about this, that's for damn sure."

"What?" Sam snorted. "Why? I think that's something she'd wanna know about, Dean."

"No it ain't." Dean went on. "Think about it. She never wanted this, hell she tried everything to ignore it and block it away. And a few weeks ago when we thought it was happening then, did you see the look on her face? She was scared outa her mind. We can't tell her about it. If she doesn't know, then she can go on believing that she's still human."

"Yeah but for how long?" Sam shrugged. "Five years? Ten? After a while she's gonna start to notice that she's not aging, Dean. Then what?"

"Then we'll tell her." Dean chugged at his beer. "But right now, she's got enough to worry about. What with the kid and this upcoming "war". Jeez we don't need to slap her in the face with this one too."

Cas finally nodded. "I believe you're right. It could cause far more harm than good."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Are you serious right now? Think about it, guys. Lara has the ability to smite anything that threatens her to a burnt crisp, and you wanna just ignore that?"

"Yep-" Dean stood. "Cause she's gotta have something to hang on to, Sammy. I mean, we pretty much just found out we're goin to war with an army of pissed off angels that wanna kill her kid, and you wanna go and tell her that she's not human anymore, and now is the _one _thing she's wanted to avoid since the second she found out about it?"

Sam sighed and shook his head. "I still think it's a mistake to keep this from her."

"Why? Because you wanna use her like you did before? Cause it makes it easier on us?"

"Yeah, Dean. Actually that is it. But not because it makes it easier on us, but because she could watch her own back and watch her kids back."

"We got the kids back. Ain't no one better to watch out for it than the three of us." Dean glared at Lee. "You're not counted in on that."

"Why am I not surprised?" Lee rolled his eyes.

"So it's unanimous then?" Cas asked. "We won't tell her?"

"No, we're not telling her." Dean answered, shooting dagger eyed stares at both Sam and Lee. "Right?"

"Fine." Sam relented. "I won't say anything."

"And I could care less what happens with you lot. So I won't say anything either, that is- Unless she asks me." Lee said.

"Even then you keep your cake hole shut." Dean snapped. "Or I'll kick your ass, and I could, since you're pretty much human now."

Lee looked away and flattened his lips. "I think it's time I took my leave now. Tell Lara I'll see her soon." He stood and then held up a finger. "Oh, and, try searching in Savannah Georgia, you might find an angel there."

The boys watched him go and didn't even bother to offer some kind of good bye. After the bunker door had closed Dean grumbled.

"I hate that guy. I've always hated that guy. Seriously, what can we do to make him go away?"

"Nothing unfortunately." Cas sighed. "Unless we killed him of course, but then I don't think that would be a wise decision. It's a tempting thought though."

He left the library and decided to try and coax Lara out of her room again.


	16. Chapter 16

Cas knocked a few times over and I finally allowed him in. Once he closed the door behind him, the look on his face hadn't really changed from before. It was the first time I'd seen him frown in quite a long time, which was actually pretty heartbreaking.

"Are you alright?" He asked.

I sat back on the edge of the bed and shrugged. "I really don't know." He sat down beside me. "Ya know... When is it gonna stop? Is it always going to be constant chaos? One bad thing after another happening until we die?"

He swallowed a few times over. "I don't understand it either, Lara. To think that God would intentionally put an innocent child in this position... I find it hard to believe."

"You think Lee was lying then?"

He shook his head. "Not necessarily. I think he might have been right when he said God intended for this so called prophecy to go differently. He would have had to have known that a Winchester wouldn't follow the rules, just as your family never has. This child might have every ability to cast judgement upon the angels, but that doesn't mean he or she will."

"So, if God knew it wouldn't go as planned, what does he want to happen?"

"I suppose we won't know _until _it happens, unfortunately."

I took my head in my hands and let out a few deep breaths. "This sucks, Cas. Really really sucks. I mean, how fair is it to have a kid knowing that it's going to be in constant danger? What if something happens to it?"

"Nothing will happen. I won't let it." His tone was harsh and stern, a contrast to how it usually was now a days. "Sam is searching for signs of angels. Ones that would be willing to side with us. If they're out there, we'll find them."

I had no words to offer- Everything was still spinning in my mind. Ya know, normal people in this situation would be happy. A kid is supposed to be a blessing, it wasn't supposed to be cursed with a dangerous life before it was even born. Its parents weren't suppose to sit there and fear the future, and the months before it was born. I was only twelve weeks along, I still had seven months to go. This was going to be horrible.

* * *

"So-" Sam sighed. "There's been a string of miracles in Savannah. Seems like Lee knew what he was talking about."

Honestly, I didn't care. Because even if there were a few kind angels out there willing to help the sick and the dying, it didn't mean they were willing to side with us. It had been a week since Lee left, and in that week I hadn't been able to figure a way out of this hell.

"And?" I grumbled.

"And... Shouldn't we check it out? I mean, if it's one of the angels Lee was talking about..."

"Not a guarantee on that, Sammy." Dean replied, staring at his half eaten stack of pancakes. "We could show up and get clobbered just like the last time."

"And I don't believe it would be wise for Lara to go this time around." Cas added, turning away from the stove. "They would be expecting that."

"I'm not going to stay stuck in here for the next seven months, guys. It's not possible, I would go insane." I scowled.

"As much as I wanna disagree with that-" Dean went on. "She's right. She couldn't stay locked up here for seven months, so we're gonna need to figure somethin out. Cas, you know of a spell of some kind that could keep her permanently blocked from angel vision?"

Cas finally sat down at the kitchen table after lying my breakfast, which was another omelet, in front of me.

"Technically if the sigils carved into her ribs are still there then she wouldn't need a spell." He answered.

"Why wouldn't they still be there?" I asked, raising a brow.

All three men fell silent which of course roused my curiosity.

"It's not that they would be gone, Lara-" Cas said finally, as he and my eldest brother exchanged panicked glances. "I think Dean was only wanting to take extra precaution."

Dean nodded, but his face looked incredibly guilty. "Yeah, that's it... Just wanna make sure you're invisible to em still is all. So, ya know, it wouldn't hurt to have something extra. Is there a spell, Cas?"

"Unfortunately not any that I know of. If she weren't pregnant I would suggest getting tattooed with the same sigils that I have."

"I could still get tatted, it won't kill me." Seriously why did they look so guilty?

"No, it wouldn't kill you. But with being pregnant the healing process is slowed, and there's a greater risk for infection, which could severely harm the child. So I don't think it would be a good idea." Cas finished.

I took a few bites of my breakfast after I noticed Cas lecturing me with his eyes.

"Well-" I said with my mouth full. "Since the sigils on my ribs are still there, then I think I should be ok. So if you plan on driving to Savannah, I'm coming with you."

Dean and Sam fell silent while Cas continued to glare at me. "Lara, why do you insist on putting yourself in harms way when you could easily stay behind just this one time?"

Dean cringed and slowly backed away from the table, Sam pretended to take interest in a ball of lint on the floor. I guess they expected me to start screaming and cussing, which actually I wanted to do.

"Because-" I said, minding my tone. "Seeing is that I'm involved in this, and I'm carrying the kid, I want to be there to interrogate any angels we might come across. Not that I don't trust you guys, but if we're gonna be trusting any angel out there to watch our backs, I want to be there to make sure he's legit."

"I'm the childs Father, I think I could be the judge of that, Lara. Especially since not so long ago I was one of them."

"Dude, seriously- Shut up," Dean grumbled. "Don't go pissing her off when there's a fork in her hand."

Cas' face remained blank. "I'm not trying to "piss" her off, and normally I wouldn't want to start an argument, but circumstances are different now. Lara might be able to make her own choices as a grown woman, but now she's pregnant. And since the child's mine, I think I should have a say in the matter."

I rested my head on my hand and watched the interaction, somehow finding amusement in the fact that I wasn't getting pissed but Dean was.

"Just cause you're the baby daddy don't mean you got the right to tell the chick what to do-" Dean shrugged. "Besides, she's right. We shouldn't be making all the decisions without her."

"And what would you suggest, Dean?" Cas' eyes squinted. "That we just allow her to run head first into dangerous situations when we know for a fact that the angels want her dead?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying."

Sam and me smirked at each other, both sitting back with our arms crossed and watching the show.

"Really? Then would you care to enlighten me?" Cas shrugged.

"I'm just sayin that it's not logical to keep her locked up here like a prisoner. Yeah, it's your kid and sure you got a say, but... Lara's capable of lookin after herself too." Dean seemed to think that was explanation enough, and I could tell he was trying to send a message to Cas with his eyes.

Cas stared at him for a moment before his hardened expression softened, and he sat back allowing his eyes to fall to the table.

"Perhaps you're right." He replied.

Wait a minute... What the fuck just happened? Ok, clearly there was something they weren't tellin me. How did an almost heated discussion suddenly shift into Cas relenting, especially when it was a topic he was content with being right about?

"Uh, guys?" I said, forcing their eyes on me now. "What was that all about?"

"Nothing." Both Cas and Dean said in unison.

"Righttt, no I'm serious. What the hell was that? One second Cas is ready to lock me in the dungeon to make sure I don't get myself ganked and the next he's admitting defeat and agreeing with you?" I glared at Dean. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Guys..." Sam sighed. "Why don't you just..."

"Shut up, Sam!" Yet again Cas and Dean spoke in unison.

My eyes widened slightly and I pushed away from the table. "Ok, start talking. Now! What aren't you telling me?!"

Cas' eyes went shifty and he stood next. "Lara, everything is fine. I promise, and there's nothing we're not telling you."

"Don't fucking lie to me, yes there is! Sam..." I leaned forward resting my hands on the table. "What's going on?"

"Keep your damn mouth shut, Sammy." Dean threatened.

Sams jaw clenched and he shook his head. "No, I'm sorry but she has a right to know- Especially now that everything is so dangerous." Now he stood, and Dean followed. Now all four of us were just standing around the table shooting death stares at each other. "Lee told us something before he left."

"Sam. Don't." Cas' tone was more gravelly than it had been in ages.

"We can't exactly hide it from her anymore, Cas. It's pretty obvious that we know something she doesn't. Next time, maybe you two morons should be a little more inconspicuous, huh?" Sam nodded and looked at me. "Lee told us that your spell had dissolved... Sometime after the angels fell. Which meant, you've been a walking talking seraphim for over two years."

After he said that first instincts were to laugh, because clearly this was the makings of an incredibly bad joke. But Cas and Deans reactions weren't that of humor. They both looked beyond pissed.

"Wait a second..." I tried to huff out a laugh but it came out more along the lines of a gasp. "That can't be possible... I would have known..."

"According to Lee you wouldn't have-" Sam interrupted. "He said that since he gave you the knowledge on how to control your abilities you would have kept him from exploding subconsciously. And, since you didn't know the spell had dissolved, and you felt no different than before, there would be no reason why you'd use those abilities."

I fell back into my chair and tried to work the air back into my lungs. "Ok... And, you guys didn't tell me this why exactly?"

"We thought it would cause more harm than good." Cas answered. "We certainly weren't holding it from you to be malicious."

"So let me get this straight-" I stood again, only now I actually was pissed. "You find out that I'm capable of keeping all our asses safe and you decide not to tell me, because... You're afraid that I would, what? Freak out? Couldn't you give me a little more fucking credit than that?"

Deans face fell flat. "Uh, well... We thought that..."

"Did it ever cross your minds that it's more than just mine, or your feelings now? That shit has already begun to hit the fan, and we're all in danger including my kid? And you were just content with locking me away in the bunker instead of letting me go with you to round up some ally angels, when really, I could friggin smoke anyone that might cause us issues?"

"Ok, this so isn't goin the way I thought it would." Dean sighed.

"Lara, we thought that it would upset you." Cas said. "You were so adamant about keeping the spell intact that we assumed..."

"You assumed." I nodded. "That's the problem. Instead of talking to me about this like adults you decide to keep this secret. Not a smart move there, guys. Really, not smart. It might surprise you, but as much as I don't like the thought of being what I am, I hate the thought of something happening to my unborn child more. So, even if it means I'm a walking talking nuke, fine- At least I know I can keep it safe now."

They fell silent, and while Dean and Cas refused to look at me Sam crossed his arms.

"Just so you know- I didn't want to keep this from you." Sam said.

"Wow thanks ya dick." Dean pouted. "Way to throw Cas and me under the bus."

Sam only gave a sarcastic smart ass smile before turning and putting his plate in the sink.

"I'm sorry, Lara." Cas went on. "I thought I was protecting you. If I would have known how you felt then of course I would have told you the truth."

I tried to calm myself down by taking a few deep breaths. "Yeah, I know. I mean, it's not like I handled the thought of being seraphim very well in the past. But, really... I've had time to adjust over the years, and like I said, I might not like the thought of it- But I really don't have much of a choice in the matter. So I can either crawl into a corner and cry, or try my best to work past it."

"So now that's over-" Sam returned to the table. "Maybe now we can talk about what we're gonna do in Savannah."

Dean still wasn't happy with the situation and I was just counting down the seconds before he exploded.

"I hope you're happy, Sammy-" He said. "You got what you wanted, huh? Lara knows the truth, she can start donkey punching the angels, and you can sit back and take a load off... Good job!"

Sams brows furrowed. "Dean. For the millionth time I didn't want to tell her the truth just so we could use her. I'm thinking of the kid! Yeah, there's a lot we can do on our own, but when it comes to something like this... I don't think it's such a bad thing that Lara can do some smoking. It might be hard for you to believe but I want this kid to survive, I want it to be born. Call me crazy but I like the thought of having another member of the family."

"Guys..." I rose my hand. "Just calm down so we can head to Georgia maybe?"

"Fine..." Dean shook it off. "Go pack then. We'll hit the road.

I left the kitchen after barely touching my breakfast, and headed back to my room. I expected Cas to follow me, just as he always did, but this time he waited a good five minutes when my bag was halfway packed. When he stepped into the room and closed the door, the look on his face was hard to read.

The one thing Cas and I never did was fight. He always had the patience of a saint it seemed, even when I could be a total bitch face and make life a living hell. I don't know what it was, but he seemed to have a special section reserved only for tolerating my annoying habits. The one and only time he had ever rose his voice to me was a long ass time ago after I had allowed Eve to bite me.

But, judging by his expression I could tell he was actually mad this time, only he wasn't saying anything.

"Ok," I said, swinging around. "Just spit it out?"

His face remained indignant but his brows did twitch. "What?"

"Whatever you're pissed about. Just say it."

He moved his eyes from mine and seemed to let them focus on the nightstand.

"For all of these years I've sat back and held my tongue when it concerns you. Even when it went against my better judgment. Even when in the end, it resulted in something horrible happening to you-" Now he glared at me. "I'm not going to do that this time, Lara. There's even more at stake now."

I dropped the handle of my duffel bag and nodded. "Ok, go on?"

"This is _my _child-" His tone had yet again gone harsh. "Not just yours. Which means even if I end up angering you it can't he helped. I have to speak my mind. And I don't want you having any part in the search for our allies. When are you going to understand that I'm trying my best- I'm only trying to protect you and the baby? Even in the past when it was only you, I was trying to protect you and always I was fought against. And always I broke down and allowed you to do things your way, and look what happened."

I sighed and approached him, staring him in the eye.

"For one-" I rose my finger. "You didn't _allow _me to do anything. I was capable of making my own choices even if they were incredibly stupid ones." He opened his mouth to object but I pressed my finger to his lips. "But, you're right. At least this time. It is different, it's more than just my life at stake- And I'm sorry if you think that I don't listen to you, or you seem to think I just don't care." I sighed and lowered my hand. "You're right. It's stupid of me to insist on doing this when it's most likely going to be dangerous."

He sighed deeply, relief etching across his features. "So what will you do?"

"I don't know. I mean, seraphim or not- It could still be just as risky. One false move or someone that might be a little quicker than me and I could be dead." I shrugged. "But you do know that I can't stay locked up in this place for seven more months, right?"

"Of course. But that doesn't mean you have to participate in every mission. Look at what's happened already. You very well could have miscarried, and after that were nearly killed by Eremiels followers."

"We're gonna have to come to some sort of compromise here, Cas. Clearly I can't stay locked up here, and I can't exactly jump full force into things that could be dangerous either. So, if you have any ideas. Speak them."

His eyes fell to the floor and he shook his head. "I honestly don't know, Lara. It seems there's no positive outcome for either option."

I grabbed his hand and pulled him to the bed, and we both sat.

"What if... What if there was some way of sending out a message to all of the angels? What if we somehow leaked that my spell was broken? That I'm not human anymore? From what you always said, and from personal experience, the angels don't exactly like to tangle with the seraphim... Maybe it would spook em enough that they wouldn't be so stupid as to try something?"

His brows squeezed together. "That would discourage quite a number of them, but not all of them. Some would be willing to take the risk just to ensure the child not being born."

"Yeah, maybe. Wow. Why can't things be simple for once?"

He still looked just as sullen, and I knew what he was thinking. If he only had his mojo back he would feel a hell of a lot more capable. But that clearly wasn't in the cards anymore. Which meant we needed to find something else.

"You should pack the rest of your things," He said. "Dean will want to leave soon."

I arched a brow. "So you're letting me go?"

"I have no choice. I need to be there to interrogate any angel we might find, and I wouldn't want to leave you here alone. But, perhaps you are right in the thought of sending out a message. Theoretically all we would have to do was pray and every angel on earth would hear it."

That made me sneer wickedly. "Who's gonna be praying out the threatening message?"

He finally looked at me and gave half a crooked smile. "Me."


	17. Chapter 17

_**You'll see in this chapter that I don't kill the characters I like. Well, obviously I don't because Gabriel is still alive. lol**_

* * *

I tried not to act like a crazy tourist when we arrived in Savannah. But it was hard not to. This city was pretty awesome, and it was notorious for being one of the most haunted cities in America. Silly that I would get excited over something like that, but when did we ever get the chance to explore a haunted location without the intention of burning a spirits bones in the end?

But when we arrived in town, Dean went against our routine this time and found a decent hotel to stay in, that was just above a restaurant and bar. He figured that if any angels were expecting us then they wouldn't think to look for us there.

I threw my bag down on one of the queen sized beds and sighed. Sam and Cas had already begun to draw angel proofing on the windows and walls, which resulted in me shaking my head. Seriously, I wonder how many hotel or motel managers we'd pissed off over the years? No kidding we'd leave and not bother paying for damages. Dick move, I know, but generally we were being chased or almost killed at the time.

"So where should we look first?" Dean asked, after grabbing a beer from the mini fridge.

"That's a good question. I have no idea who might be here curing the ill and dying." Cas answered. "If we had a name of course we could summon them, but..."

"Um-" I rose my hand, interrupting him. "Guys, I know that you don't exactly want me tagging along on this crap but are you forgetting that I can kinda see the angels faces now?"

Everyone gawked at me as though they had indeed forgotten.

"How close exactly do you need to be to see an angels true face?" Sam asked.

"I could spot them from pretty long distances, since they're so bright... Why?"

Dean and Sam exchanged looks before Dean nodded. "Ok, awesome. Guess we're goin on a little stake out."

"Stake out?" Cas questioned. "Where?"

"The hospital." Dean stood and adjusted his jacket collar. "We're gonna have to bide our time and watch who comes in and out of that place. If an angel is in there layin their hands on the patients, Lara will see em."

"And-" I continued before Cas could object. "Since we'll be sitting in the car and not getting involved, no one should notice us so we'll be safe."

"And if we find the angel responsible?" He retorted.

"Sammy and me will take care of it." Dean answered. "Lara won't even have to get outa the car."

Cas nodded, and didn't seem to have any issues for the moment.

"Let's get going then." Sam said, heading for the door. "We're wasting time."

* * *

I seriously thought I had lost all feeling in my butt. We had been sitting in the car for over five hours, watching the people come and go from the hospital. It was well past dinner time, I was starving and was about to pee my pants. My brothers seemed to be through with this mission just as I was. Dean had nodded off a couple of times, and Sam had resorted to clicking around on his phone searching for other states that might have had signs of angels. Cas, he kept his eyes fixed on the entrance of the hospital as though he might be able to see who might have been a former sibling.

"Still nothin?" Dean asked after a loud yawn.

"Not yet." I replied, shifting uncomfortably. "Ya know, I don't want to bitch but I have to piss like a race horse."

Both brothers looked at me from over their shoulders.

"Uh..." Sam flinched. "One of us could go with her into the hospital? Use a bathroom in there?"

"Or we'll all go." Cas scowled. "We aren't taking any chances."

"Right-" Dean opened his door. "Everyone got their angel blades?"

After a thorough weapons check we left the impala in the parking lot and headed for the entrance of the hospital. I practically galloped my way ahead, pushing past a few people and entering the front doors. I found it hilarious how much had changed now. Instead of worrying about the stake out, enemies and things like that- Now we all needed to adjust to the knocked up chick having to pee.

Inside at first glance it was the typical hospital, with a waiting room just to the left, and on the right the gift shop. Ahead a few feet was the bathrooms, which I zoomed for. Before I could run into the ladies room though Sam grabbed my hand.

"Wait a second-" He shook his head. "Lemme check it out first."

"Seriously?" I fidgeted like crazy. "I'm gonna pee my pants."

He rolled his eyes and knocked on the door. "Hello, anyone in there?" When there was no response he pushed the door open and glanced under every stall door. "All clear, go ahead."

I shoved him out the door and locked myself in the stall. I think the most annoying thing about being knocked up, other than puking all of the time, was how much I needed to pee. It was seriously inconvenient having to stop on the road every twenty minutes, especially if we were in a hurry.

Once I was through I washed my hands and took a quick glance at myself in the mirror. I didn't think I would ever adjust to seeing my cheeks so rosy. And overall, I looked healthier than I ever had, and in the past I never had any issues.

After I left the bathroom all three men were crowded around the door awkwardly.

"Wow." I said with a snort. "You guys don't look like skeevy pervs at all."

"Shut up." Dean scowled. "We're not takin any chances."

"Before we leave you think we could grab something from some vending machines?" I added. "I'm starving."

"I'll go." Sam offered. "You guys head back to the car."

Dean and Cas crowded around me as we took a few steps towards the door. But I felt my feet skid to a stop when a young man walked in.

He looked to be around twenty, or twenty one- Definitely young. He had a beanie pulled down over his head and the way his shoulders slumped and he avoided eye contact with anyone showed that he was nervous and trying not to be noticed. For a moment I blatantly gawked at him as he strode past and headed towards the elevators. No, it wasn't his strange behavior, the beanie or the nervous strides he took that caught my attention. It was the bright and glowing figure I could see underneath his vessel.

Quickly I latched onto Cas' arm. "Him." I whispered, pointing towards the young man as he stopped at the elevators. "It's him, he's an angel."

Dean nearly pulled his angel blade from his jacket before catching himself. There were dozens of people in the waiting room, and several more waiting with the guy at the elevator.

"You sure?" He asked.

"Yeah, definitely. He's like a freakin spotlight, dude."

"Ok, how're we going to do this?" Sam asked. "Lara was supposed to be in the car."

"No time for that now-" Dean motioned for us to follow. "Stay calm."

Cas clamped onto my wrist as we slowly headed towards the elevator to wait behind the young guy.

"Do you see any others, Lara?" He asked quietly.

I shook my head. "No, just him."

He nodded. "Good, it shouldn't be too difficult to subdue him then." Cas flicked his eyes towards Dean, whose hand was lingering near the opening of his jacket. "Don't underestimate him."

We stopped behind a group of three, one including the angel, as we waited for the elevator to open. Once they did, Dean stepped in front of the guy and nonchalantly showed him the angel blade in his jacket while everyone else piled into the elevator.

"Good to see you." Dean said sarcastically. "It's been a while, dude. How bout we go talk, huh?"

The young mans eyes widened as he stared down at the blade Dean was flashing.

"Please-" He said. "I haven't done anything wrong. There's no need for violence."

"We'll be the judge of that." Sam retorted, sarcastically putting his arm around the guys shoulder. "Let's take a walk." We started for the door and Sam nudged him. "Smile, don't look so freaked. Act casual."

He only swallowed a few times over, his blue eyes were wide as he tried to let the panic fade from his face.

We led him outside and to the impala in the parking lot, once we were far enough away from hearing ears Sam shoved the kid back against the car.

"Who are you?" He asked. "What's your name?"

His eyes darted from each of us before settling on Cas. "Castiel? Is that you?"

Cas cinched his lips. "Which sibling are you?"

"Samandriel-" He answered. "I heard you'd become human, but... It was so hard to believe. Your vessel is easily recognizable now a days..." Now he looked at me, his face falling flat. "The seraphim. The one you prayed about, brother?"

My brow arched, I didn't know Cas had already said his little threatening prayer. So, I gave a smirk and wave. "Hi. I'm Lara, and should you be a dick like the rest of your siblings I'll be the one smiting you today."

His hands never once left his sides. "I can promise that I'm not going to cause any problems. I swear. I'm only here to help. I haven't done anything that's deserving of a smiting."

Cas furrowed his brows. "I've not heard of you since the angels were expelled, I thought you were dead."

He nodded. "Since we fell I've been trying to keep myself hidden. I haven't joined any of the factions and because of that there's been a price on my head. Many of our siblings have taken a turn that's not favorable. The main one of course wanting to come after you Castiel."

Dean cocked his head to the side. "Wait a second, that's the last thing you heard? That everyone still wants to clobber Cas?"

Samandriel eased up slightly, standing taller. "Like I said, I've been in hiding- Which means that I haven't had any contact with our siblings. If there's anything new that's come up I wouldn't know about it..." He paused, eying us suspiciously. "Why? What's happened?"

"That's not important right now." Cas answered. "What you're going to tell us is where do you stand? Because a war is coming in the future, and your siblings are the cause of it."

I flinched slightly hearing Cas refer to the angels as only Samandriels siblings.

"A war?" Samandriels mouth went agape. "Why is there going to be a war?"

Dean stepped forward and immediately began to pat him down, looking slightly surprised when he found no weapon. "Ok, you're clean, so- We'll talk about this somewhere else, huh?" He then opened the car door. "Get in."

"I suppose I don't have much of a choice in the matter?" Samandriel sighed.

Dean pulled his angel blade and waved in the air. "Nope. Get in."


	18. Chapter 18

Samandriel was stuck in between Cas and Sam, while I rode shot-gun. Both had their angel blades pointed at the poor kid in the middle, and he sat stiff with his eyes shifting back and forth.

"Where are you taking me?" He asked nervously.

"Somewhere quiet and isolated, where we can discuss this calmly." Cas answered.

"And... Where you figure you could kill me and no one would notice." Samandriel sighed. "Like I said, I promise that I'm not the enemy."

"You let us be the judge of that." Dean retorted, taking a sharp turn that led down a gravel rode into the country.

We drove for another ten miles before he turned off on a small parking area which led to hiking trails. There were no cars, so chances were good we'd be the only ones there. I climbed out first, followed by the others and Sam had grabbed Samandriel by the collar and tugged him out.

"Let's get started-" Dean said, smacking his hands together. "First thing's first, you mean to tell us you've never heard of this new "prophecy" or whatever?"

Samandriel eyed us warily. "What new prophecy? Like I told you, I haven't spoken to my siblings in years. I don't know what's been happening."

Cas cleared his throat, and let out a sigh. "I think, Dean- That the best course of action would be to tell him everything."

"Really?" I retorted. "You actually wanna do that?"

"Want to? No, of course not. But if we're to gain allies it would require being truthful, unfortunately."

So they started in with the story. Of me being pregnant with a kid that was supposed to grow up and nuke the angels. That the half of the angels wanted my child dead, and the others were waiting for judgment day to come to pass. That this war meant we needed to create our own makeshift army, and we needed all the ally angels we could find. Samandriel only stared at us in shock, his eyes were a combination of fear and relief, if it's at all possible.

"A new era?" He questioned. "This child is to bring a new era? A peaceful one?"

"If that's what Gabriel meant, yeah-" Sam answered. "At least with taking out the angels that deserve it anyways."

"That's all I've ever wanted." He smiled faintly. "So many of our siblings, Castiel- Have taken the wrong path. So many are spiteful and only want revenge. They don't care about Gods orders any longer, all they want to do is hurt and kill." He nodded and stood tall. "Of course I'll join in with you. Naturally I don't want to see my siblings die, but- They're beyond help now, so- Anything I can do to help, I'll do it."

Yeah sure we were skeptical, it would be hard to determine which angel was a dick and which one wasn't. One could very well say they wanted to join us, then turn right around and stab us, or me, in the back.

"If you really mean that-" Cas said. "Then we're going to need information. Any other angel out there that could potentially join our cause, we'll need to know their names."

Samandriel nodded. "Well, I'm afraid that I don't know of many. Since I fell I've done my best to avoid them- But, there are a few that I've run into over the years that have expressed the same attitude as my own. Inias, for one."

"Inias?" Cas' eyes widened. "He's still alive?"

"Of course, why wouldn't he be?"

"I assumed he was killed by the leviathan. I assumed everyone from my former garrison had been killed."

He shook his head. "Not all of them, Castiel. Other than Inias there's Daniel and Saraphiel."

Cas shifted his gazes to me and my brothers. "In the past they always followed Gods orders."

"So you know these guys?" Dean asked.

"Saraphiel is a female, but yes. Just as Eremiel, in the past in times of distress we served in the same garrison." He sighed deeply. "But, since they were expelled I don't know their mindsets. We can't simply go by Samandriels words alone."

"Could always summon em, get em trapped in a ring of holy fire." Dean said, shrugging. "Unless chuckles over there knows where they're hiding out?" He motioned to Samandriel.

"The last I saw of Daniel he was in Ohio, boarding a bus to Oklahoma. As far as Inias and Saraphiel, I'm sorry- I don't know where they are." He replied.

"If you're really with us on this-" Sam stepped forward. "Then you should be willing to do whatever it takes to help us out, right?"

"Of course. I told you I would do what I could." Samandriel stared up at Sam, he looked so tiny and young in his presence.

"So if we wanted you around when we summoned these angels, you wouldn't have a problem with that?"

Samandriels eyes fell slightly. "I would prefer to conduct a meeting peacefully, but I can understand your reluctance to trust my siblings. I suppose trapping them in holy fire would be the smartest move. So, no- I won't have a problem with it."

"Guys," I said, motioning over my shoulder. "Let's talk for a second. You-" I pointed to the angel. "Keep your celestial ears off."

He frowned slightly and stayed by the car as we walked a good twenty feet away.

"You sure about this guy, Cas?" Dean asked. "Kinda hard to tell whether or not he could be lying."

Cas glanced over his shoulder to his former sibling who was waiting patiently. "I wish I could know for certain, Dean- But without any abilities it's impossible for me to tell." Now he looked at me. "Technically Lara could do it. The seraphim had mind reading abilities just as every other angel."

"Psh-" I snorted. "Like I know how to do that?"

"You're supposed to know-" Sam replied. "According to what Lee said, you know how to use your abilities." Now he shrugged. "So, do you, I dunno, sense anything when you're lookin at the guy?"

I scowled. "Wait here, gimme a second."

Now I moved back to the car where he waited. I didn't say a word, just stood as closely as possible as he slowly inched backwards until he was pressed against the car and couldn't move anymore. I stared into his eyes, still not speaking and he looked about ready to crap his pants. But after he realized I wasn't going to burn him to a crisp he eased up and kept his eyes locked on mine. After a good minute or so I cocked my head to the side and nodded.

He expected me to say something, but instead I returned to where the boys were standing.

"Well?" Sam asked, giving me a head shake.

"He's scared to death of me." I answered. "Like, shit your pants kind of scared. I'm not sure if I was doing it right, but- I couldn't really sense any negativity. He seems like a good guy."

Both Dean and Cas leaned sideways to glare at him. "You sure?" Dean asked.

"Well, no. Remember I only just found out that I'm not a friggin human anymore, Dean- So I haven't really had time to practice my stupid abilities."

"It would be instinct, Lara-" Cas replied. "If you don't sense anything negative then I would say he could be trusted."

"And-" Sam added. "I don't think Lee would have pointed us in this direction if Samandriel was gonna be trouble."

"Ok then." Dean stomped forward and opened the passenger side door, sifting through the glove box until pulling out a spare cell phone. "You take this," He said, shoving it in Samandriels hands. "You answer it whenever we call, got it?"

Samandriel stared at the phone for a moment before nodding. "I got it."

"If you're really with us, then that means you do what we say, no arguments. And you keep your mouth shut about us in case you run into any of your asshole brothers."

Still he nodded. "I understand."

"What you need to do is try to find others that aren't against us." Sam said now. "Which means, you need to be more careful. If we could find you, then that means they'll be able to too."

"If there's really going to be a war, it will require more than just a few angels siding with you." Samandriel pocketed the phone. "We'll need weapons."

"Weapons, as in _weapons_?" Dean arched both brows. "Like, heavens weapons?"

He nodded in answer.

"Cas?" I said, nudging him since he had gone silent. "Any ideas? You kinda knew where they were in the past."

His jaw tightened. "Balthazar had the weapons, I have no idea if he's still alive."

Was he lying? It seemed to be so. "Cas... Balthazar was the dude that came and warned me that you were opening purgatorys door. What happened to him?"

His eyes shifted. "We had a disagreement, he was wounded and disappeared. I honestly don't know if he's alive or not."

Dean pursed his lips. "Injured by you, I take it?"

Cas nodded. "It wasn't my proudest moment, Dean. I... I learned that he had come to you with information about my opening the door. At the time I considered it betrayal, we fought, he was stabbed and then vanished."

"So, I guess we could count him out as far as being an ally goes." I sighed.

Cas looked like he wanted to run fleeing. He didn't like thinking about all of the mistakes he made in the past, and just when we thought he was moving past it- Something would be mentioned, or turned up that would send it all crashing back home. I tried to reassure him by grabbing his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. He perked up slightly, pulling his eyes from the ground to give me a timid smile.

"We could summon him anyways, couldn't we?" Sam asked. "Just to be sure?"

"We could-" Cas answered. "Although it might not be best if I was present for it."

"No one is hiding." Dean snapped. "We're gonna do this together. If Balthazar wants to hold a grudge, fine- But we need all the help we can get here, so I'm not exactly very picky."

"When do you wanna do this?" I asked.

Dean examined the area surrounding, how quiet and secluded it happened to be and shrugged. "Might as well do it now."

"Question," I said raising my hand. "But, how're we to summon an angel when they don't exactly have their wings anymore?"

"The ritual automatically pulls them to our location-" Cas answered. "Wings aren't required."

Handy, I thought. And this was surprising yes, but we didn't have all the time in the world to dilly dally. As much as we didn't care for it, we knew we needed to start gathering allies. So, Dean rifled through the trunk until pulling out the holy oil. Instead of making a small circle however, he poured it around the area successfully enclosing all of us in the middle.

"Big enough circle there, bro?" I asked sarcastically.

"It's precaution-" Dean grumbled in return, afterwards placing the oil back in the trunk. He then proceeded to remove the necessary ingredients needed for summing an angel. "Ok, well... This should be a shit ton of fun, huh?"

Cas actually looked petrified, and really- So was I. I mean, there was no way of knowing how Balthazar was going to respond to seeing Cas again. I had only met the dude once, but from what I had heard of him he was a snippy little asshole, but not exactly dangerous. Of course, that was before Cas tried to kill him.

Sam and Dean both worked together with combining the ingredients in the bowl and chanting out whatever needed to be said, and after Sam dropped a lit match in the bowl which resulted in the usual poof of smoke, we waited.

It was silent for a good thirty seconds before I heard footsteps crunching across the gravel.

"Oh, dammit- You've got to be joking?" Balthazar suddenly said, his eyes immediately went to Cas. "Castiel. The last time we spoke you stabbed me in the lungs and tried to kill me. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't return the favor?"

Cas stood tall, narrowing his eyes. "Balthazar. Apologizing for that mistake I know would do absolutely no good. But I offer it none the less."

Balthazar shifted his gazes to Samandriel now. "Slumming it I see?" He snickered. "Samandriel, what are you doing here with these oafs?"

"I believe I'll let them explain that." The poor kid, who still looked ready to crap himself, replied.

Balthazar arched his brows. "I take it, this has to do with this new prophecy? Yes, I know about it already- I imagine every angel that's stuck here on earth would have by this point. Honestly, I figured that you would be calling me, begging for assistance."

"We're not begging." Dean retorted. "We just wanna talk."

He shook his head, snickering as his eyes trailed off at the trees. "You know, I did my part in helping you when I warned about Castiel opening the door. I think my part in your shenanigans is done, don't you?"

"There's going to be a _war_, Balthazar-" Sam said. "It's not something you can ignore."

"Can't I? Believe me I have no desire to get involved in any battles, especially when it concerns angels, a judgement casting child, and a former brother who tried to kill me." He glared at Cas again. "Why in the hell should I help you now, Castiel? After what you did?"

"Like you've never made a mistake?" I said now, feeling my temper flare. "Like you've never done something reckless? Oh, no clearly not- It's not like you faked your death, stole all of heavens weapons and then ran and hid like a friggin pussy. Nah, you're just perfect in every way."

He only smirked at my statement. "I did what I had to do to survive."

"And apparently Cas felt the same way. No, I'm not condoning what he did, and he's not either. He's sorry for it, so stop being spiteful and start thinking about the future instead of your damn grudges." I crossed my arms while Cas only stared at me.

"What Lara is trying to convey-" Cas said after a sigh. "Is that you can hate me for my actions all you want. I don't ask for forgiveness. I only ask that you consider what will happen if you stand aside and not participate in this upcoming war. Do you really think that you would be able to survive?"

"Honestly?" Balthazar shrugged. "No. Probably not. But my question is, is why should I side with you? Why shouldn't I side with the others?"

"Are you really that stupid?" Sam replied. "Why would you even think about doing that? If you know what this prophecy is then you should realize that obviously, siding with us is the right choice. Otherwise you'd be going against God."

"Right, God... And where is my Father? Hm? Because I certainly haven't seen or heard from him, in what's it been? Centuries? If he gave a damn about anything then he would have appeared ages ago."

"God. No god. I don't really give a crap-" Dean grumbled. "Ok, so let's put it this way..." He now stepped closer. "You side with us, you won't get your ass deep fried extra crispy, you side against us," He smirked. "Well I think you know where I'm goin with this."

Balthazar let his eyes fall onto me again. "I must confess that being on the side of a seraphim is much more appealing than not. But that still doesn't mean I want any part of this. Samandriel-" The kid looked up to him now. "What's your viewpoint on this situation?"

"I think you know, brother." He answered. "As much as I hate the thought of a war, something needs to be done. Judgement must be cast against the fallen so finally heaven can be peaceful again, finally we can go home."

"Yes because heaven is clearly _so_ much better than here." Balthazar rolled his eyes with a sigh. "Fine... I suppose yours is the best side to be on..." He paused and added a spiteful. "You bastards."

"Are you still in possession of heavens weapons?" Cas asked now.

"Of course, they're my insurance, Castiel." He looked from each of us. "You don't expect for me to give them to you?"

"Maybe just loan them to us." I shrugged. "When we need them anyways."

His face went blank. "Perhaps when the time calls for it, we could negotiate."

"Thank you, Balthazar." Cas said.

"Don't thank me. I'm doing what needs to be done to ensure I don't get my ass slaughtered. Believe me, I'm not doing this for any of you." He eyed Cas up and down. "I would give you a flogging of the century, but seeing is that you're human I think that's punishment enough..." Now he crossed his arms. "So who else have you gathered for your army?"

"Counting you and Samandriel?" Sam replied. "Just you two."

"Shocking-" He nodded. "Alright, well. This has been lovely but I really must dash." He cast another glance to Cas, and I was surprised to see no hatred in his eyes. "I'll keep a look out for anyone that might be willing to give us a helping hand."

Since he couldn't zap away he was forced to walk, and instead of taking the road like I figured he would, he entered the trails that led into the forest and disappeared.

"That went well." Dean said like a smart ass. "Why do I think this is gonna bite us in the ass later?"

"Because it's Balthazar-" Sam answered. "You never know what the guy is thinking."

My brows furrowed and I shook my head. "Actually, I kinda do... Maybe Cas was right, maybe this serpahim instinct thing can come in handy."

Now that I knew I actually had that ability and was really trying to use it, it was as though everything started slamming me all at once. Feelings, emotions, energies... Even things that I couldn't identify, certain smells and colors of objects that in the past had been completely normal. Apparently I had just opened up a damned floodgate.

"Why?" Cas tugged on my hand. "What did you sense from him?"

"Well he's still a cocky s.o.b-" I started. "And yeah clearly he's not happy about you stabbing him, but honestly, you wanna know what I felt when he first showed up?" Everyone nodded. "He was relieved to see that you weren't dead, Cas. He must have thought you were or something."

We all fell silent, and Cas merely let his eyes fall to the ground.

"Excuse me?" Samandriel suddenly said. "But... Do you think we could return to town, maybe?"

I think we had forgotten the guy was even standing there he was so quiet. With a sigh Dean motioned towards the impala and he climbed back in.

So I guess the holy oil wasn't even needed for right now, thankfully. But I knew that in the future whenever we'd be interrogating future allies it wouldn't be this easy.

* * *

We weren't sure what to do with Samandriel now as we drove back into town. It would be a little hard to begin to trust someone if we were just gonna dump him off and he went on his merry way. Lee said we needed to build an army, which meant that after we had our soldiers it didn't make much sense to just let them disappear. But we couldn't take Samandriel back to the bunker with us, that's for damn sure.

When Dean pulled to a stop in front of the hospital yet again we all climbed out.

"What is it that you want me to do now?" Samandriel asked.

Everyone exchanged glances before Dean spoke.

"Two angels on our side ain't enough," He said. "So if there's anymore out there you're in charge of finding them. At least some of em. Keep your eyes open, if you come across one you call us and let us know. We'll handle the rest."

Samandriel nodded. "I understand."

"Don't make us regret this-" Sam said now. "We found you once, we could do it again."

I stood back and observed from the sidelines, unable to comprehend how in the hell it came down to this. Seriously, recruiting an angel army? Going to a literal war with the opposing side? It sounded like the makings of a sci-fi movie.

Ok, so, an angel on angel throw down here on earth- Naturally it was going to get messy. We needed to figure out a way of doing this without completely destroying the planet in the process. But that's just another thing to write down on an already staggering list of to-dos.

Samandriel asked to speak to Cas alone, and after they headed a few feet into the parking lot Dean leaned against the car beside me and sighed.

"You holdin up ok?" He asked.

"Under the circumstances I suppose so." I answered.

"This is gonna get messy-" He added and I couldn't help but snicker since I had thought that seconds beforehand. "But we'll get through it like we always do."

But did he really believe that? He could have always been saying that just to boost my spirits and spare my feelings. Yeah I knew we'd been through a lot of crap. Dying, being resurrected, Lucifer, demon blood and the apocalypse. So many things. It was basically the same shit now but just a few details had changed. The world still hanged in the balance, only it wasn't the apocalypse that was threatening it. It was the dick angels that wanted to kill my kid.

Sam moved to the other side of me, crossed his arms and watched the exchange between Cas and Samandriel. He didn't say anything but he didn't have to. I already knew what he was thinking. Exactly what Dean said, and what Dean thought himself. For the first time I think in my entire life I had a feeling that my brothers and Castiel wouldn't fail with this one. Somehow we'd get through it. There was always a lingering thought in the back of my mind with other situations. Yeah I had faith in my brothers but as a realist, I always considered what could go wrong. And really, a lot had gone wrong in the past. Yeah we muddled through but it wasn't without a shit ton of pain along the way. This time though, I wasn't thinking of what could go wrong. I couldn't. Because failing with this one meant failing my child and I sure as hell wasn't going to let that happen.

Once Cas finally returned to the impala we watched Samandriel enter the hospital doors and disappear.

"What did he want?" I asked.

Cas stared at me for a moment before his eyes fell to my stomach. "He could sense already what this child is going to be capable of."

"What?" Sam snorted. "How's that possible? It's like three inches long."

"Apparently it doesn't matter-" Cas went on. "It's hard to understand if this could be normal since Lara is the first seraphim and human hybrid ever born. I don't know if it's normal to be able to sense its powers so early on in pregnancy. But, Samandriel could. And he said that he or she could potentially be devastating."

Devastating?" Dean snapped. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"It means," I said, felling my stomach roll. "That if something were to go wrong and our enemies somehow got their hands on this kid they'd probably use it to nuke the entire planet."

Cas nodded. "Samandriel only told me this out of concern. To make sure that we're even more cautious than usual."

Dean fell silent for a moment, but his expression was enough to crack glass.

"Ya know-" He finally looked back to us. "This is reminding me a hell of a lot when I was shipped to the future. In that time Lucifer wanted Lara to breed a weapon- And hell if they didn't do that. That kid was like nothin I'd ever seen."

A shudder ran through me after that comment. Dean didn't say much about what he saw in the future but what he did was enough. This kid that Lucifer and I had together had the power to kill God himself.

"Damn..." Sam sighed. "I know it's just coincidence but, I can't help but think about what Lucifer always said..." His face fell flat. "That no matter what happened, what paths we took, we'd always end up there. He would always win."

Oh great Sam just had to go and say that. What a way to instill paranoia there, buddy. Now I'm sure we were all thinking the same fucking thing. Maybe in the future Dean was sent to, it wasn't mine and Lucifers kid but maybe mine and Castiels. Maybe something happened and he got loose from his cage, kidnapped me and the kid and that's what became of the world after... Maybe when I said to tell Cas that I forgave him, it wasn't because he was holding the reversal of my spell a secret, it was for somehow not getting me and the kid out of there. I just didn't know.

"Shut up, Sam." Dean barked. "Don' go saying shit like that."

"Yeah... Sorry." Sam sighed.

Cas had gone white as a sheet, but he moved closer and grabbed my hand.

"Whatever this means, we're going to stop it." He said. "We're going to win this war... Not them."


	19. Chapter 19

He had resorted to pacing, which isn't something he normally did. Being an angel, an archangel no less, he was accustomed to long passages of time. But this was entirely different, this was something he had been waiting for for centuries. And now that it was finally approaching, it meant he needed to step up and do something about it. He had waited around, making himself as scarce as possible, faking his death and going into hiding just to wait for this exact moment. Although he had to admit the centuries had been fun, pretending to be a trickster, pulling pranks on people, creating his own realities. But that was all over now.

When he finally heard the door creak open, he turned and gave a sarcastic smirk. With a snap of his fingers the lights overhead turned on and illuminated the area.

Gabriel watched one of his brothers enter, taking a good look around before crossing his arms.

"Hey, Balthazar!" He said, smiling. "Long time no see!"

Balthazar was momentarily speechless, at least enough to forget his usual sarcastic remarks.

"Gabriel? You're the one who summoned me?"

"Yeah, I know... Old fashioned and kinda pathetic considering who we are. But, I had to cause, _we _need to talk..." He stared at the door. "Did you pass anyone else on your way in here?"

"Samandriel was behind me, stopped to admire the artwork." He placed his hands in his pockets. "Nice location, Gabriel. The Louvre, not exactly subtle are we?"

"Ah," He waved his hand at him. "I needed someplace the others wouldn't think of."

The door opened a second time and Samandriel entered finally.

"Hey little bro," Gabriel waved sarcastically. "How was the flight over?"

"Long..." Samandriel answered. "My first time on an airplane, I'm beginning to really wish I had my wings back." He paused and admired a marble statue. "What are we doing here, Gabriel?"

"I think you know... First thing's first, did anyone else come with you guys?"

"No," Balthazar answered. "As far as I know it was just us."

"Figures." Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Really, I shouldn't be all that surprised, angels dammit- They're such sanctimonious little douchers." He then rose a finger. "Let's get started shall we?"

"Started?" Samandriel was blank faced. "What exactly are we starting?"

"The war, buckos... We're smack dab in the middle of it- Which means we gotta start making some plans."

"What sort of plans?" Balthazar crossed his arms.

Gabriel eyed them both before leaning against a pillar in the middle of the large room. "They recruited you already, right?"

"By _they_, you mean the goof troop?" Balthazar replied. "Yes, those marmosets didn't waste any time."

"If you're talking about the Winchesters and Castiel, then yes." Samandriel answered as well.

"Ok, well now here's what we're gonna do, boys." Gabriel smirked. "We're going on an angel hunt."

"By hunt, I don't suppose you mean seek them out, then converse quietly?" Balthazar arched a brow. "I'm assuming it's going to be much more bloody and dangerous."

"We got seven months until that kid is born. If you think things are bad now, just wait til it pops out. Imagine cities burning, explosions and fire falling from the sky. Yeah, it's not gonna be pretty, guys." Gabriel watched their expressions, then went on. "Look, I know you're probably wondering what the hell this has got to do with you. Especially you Balty, I know there's no love lost between you and the Winchesters, but hating them or not- You know they always come through in the end. And theirs is the side to be on."

"You're not telling us anything we didn't already know." Samandriel stated. "We already agreed to help them, so... What is it that you're getting at?"

"Seven months." He held up seven fingers. "Seven months to kick Eremiels followers in their nizzos. And seven months to try and find as many as we can to actually help us out. That's not very long. I mean, jeez, to angels that's like seven seconds."

"And?" Balthazar shrugged. "Just get to what you want."

"I'm more of a lone wolf kinda guy, isn't really my thing to have partners in crime, but... I can't do it alone. Archangel or not, I'm outnumbered. So... From here on out, you two are with me. Got it?"

Samandriel and Balthazar exchanged worried glances.

"You mean to tell us that you summoned us all the way to bloody France to tell us that? You couldn't have done it back in the states?" Balthazar looked ready to turn around and leave.

"Nope, cause there's a few of our brothers here hiding out, and I need your help to "interrogate" them."

"Wonderful, of course." Now Balthazar began to pace. "Which brothers?"

"Names don't matter right now, I just need to know if you're with me on this? Cause if not, well... We're gonna be uber boned."

Samandriel didn't seem to have any issues with it, but Balthazar was hesitant.

"I don't suppose I get a day or two to think this over? I usually work better on my own." He asked.

"Sorry, bro. We don't have the time for that. The months are ticking away, so gotta make your choice now."

Balthazar could only snicker and roll his eyes. "Well seeing is that I already agreed to help the Winchesters, I suppose it's not much different with this situation. Alright... I'm in."

* * *

It had been weeks since we went to Savannah, and in those weeks it had been surprisingly quiet. There hadn't been any jobs to turn up, no signs of angels or demons. Absolutely nothing. Normally in situations like this Dean would start to go stir crazy, but I think under the circumstances, and considering just how bat shit insane everything happened to be right now, he didn't complain. In fact, he took advantage of the quiet time by having movie and pizza nights, lazing around the bunker doing jack squat, or the most recent endeavor was making minimal repairs on our cars.

Gotta say, it was kinda nice. Yeah, normally I'd be going crazy by now too, but I don't know... Things were different now.

"Grab me a beer would ya?" Dean asked, as his head was buried under the hood of the impala.

I nodded and reached into the cooler, cracking it open and handing it to him. He took a few long gulps and I only scowled.

"I miss beer." I pouted. "I'm not puking so much anymore, and now I'm starting to miss all the things I can't have."

He retorted by taking another long gulp, adding a sarcastic "ahhh" afterwards.

"You hate me now, don't you?" He sneered.

"No more than usual."

He took a five minute break by leaning against the side of the car. "Ok, so. I was thinkin, we'll have another movie night- Force Cas to see the awesomeness that is Star Wars, whatcha think?"

I snickered. "You're seriously starting to scare me, Dean."

"Why?"

"Uh, because you're acting like this? It's been, what, four weeks since we've had anything that even remotely smells like a job, and you're just hunky dory with that?"

He shrugged. "What else are we supposed to do?"

"Just because I can't go on hunts anymore doesn't mean that you and Sam can't ya know?"

"I know..." He twirled his beer bottle in his hand. "But maybe I don't want to."

I crossed my arms over my chest. "Uh, why wouldn't you?"

After sitting his beer on the roof of the car he tinkered around his tool box. "Think about it. Our entire life has been the same thing over and over again. Killing monsters, saving the damn world, tryin not to get ourselves ganked. And apparently all of that crap was leadin up to this point. Cas rebelling and teaming up with us, everything that came after that... All prophesized about."

He went silent and I arched a brow. "And?"

"And... So if all of that was leadin up to you having this kid- Don't you think the best place for Sammy and me to be is here watchin out for you? I dunno... It's like now that this is happening, nothin else seems important. I mean, sure- I want to help people or whatever, but I think that you're a little more important right now." He shrugged again. "Plus it's nice to take a break every once in a while."

I gave half a smile. "Dean, I know that it's a big deal right now, but I also know you... And you need to be out there doing what you do best. Which is hunting. You're gonna go crazy lazing around the bunker. I know you're just lookin out for me, but you need to also do what you need and _want_ to do. Which is going out there and ganking monsters."

He didn't get the chance to argue before the bunker door opened and Cas stepped outside. He seemed to wait a moment to be certain Dean and I weren't having a private conversation before walking over and interrupting.

"It's time, Lara." He said.

Both Dean and I gawked at him awkwardly and he had the sense to say "Time for what?" Before I could.

"Time for your doctors appointment." He answered.

I fumbled slightly. "Uh, what doctors appointment?"

He arched his brows at me. "The appointment I made for you a week ago. You need regular examinations to be certain everything is going well with the pregnancy."

I stared down at the slight hump in my belly that seemed to be more accentuated by my now too tight t-shirt.

"Uh, pretty sure everything's going well." I replied.

After that statement he halfway looked as though he was going to tisk at me.

"Lara, you know that it's vital to yours and the childs health to never miss your doctors appointments. We have forty minutes to make it into town and sign in."

"Dude..." Dean cleared his throat. "You sure that it's such a good idea takin her to a doctor?"

"Of course, why wouldn't it be?" Cas squinted at him.

"Because, uh... The kids not human? It's a seraphim and there's no way of knowin what might pop up or happen."

Cas seemed to have forgotten that for a moment. "Well, regardless of that- She still needs to go."

Dean threw up his arms in defeat. "Fine, your call, man. I'll get the car finished up. Better go find Sam wherever the hell he is."

* * *

Dean fidgeted uncomfortably in his seat, trying his best to avoid the eyes of every single pregnant woman sitting in the waiting room. Sam was handling it a little better than our oldest brother, as he kept his mind occupied on his phone. I was gulping a liter of water, since apparently I needed to explode my bladder before getting an ultrasound.

After a few more minutes, Cas cleared his throat and lowered the forms he had been filling out.

"Any signs of diabetes in your family, Lara?" He asked.

Both Dean and I gawked at him before Dean said. "Diabetes? Seriously? Dude, she's a friggin seraphim... I really don't think that applies here. You might as well write a big fat NO for every one of those questions. Human? No? Not immortal? No..."

"Ok, Dean." I snorted. "Just wing it on those questions, Cas."

Cas nodded and continued to scribble on the clipboard. "When was your last menstrual cycle?"

Now both Sam and Dean glared at him.

"Uh..." I blabbered. "Well I'm sixteen weeks pregnant? So, uh... I have no idea, I think I'm the only chick in the world that doesn't keep track of that."

Cas nodded again and moved onto the next question. "Any pain during intercourse?"

"Dude!" Both Sam and Dean said.

"I'm sorry these questions are making you uncomfortable but I need to know the answers for the forms." Cas scowled. "Lara?"

"No." I replied, trying to hide my face behind a magazine.

Once he finally finished with the forms and turned them in, we went back to waiting. By now Dean was about ready to fidget right out of his chair, before grabbing a random magazine and flipping through it. A few pages in he suddenly launched the magazine into the air and it fell to his feet.

"What?" I snickered.

"I just saw a picture of a..." He made hand motions towards his crotch. "A baby just..." More hand motions. "Shooting out."

"Sorry they don't have a copy of Busty Asian beauties here, Dean. Just calm the frick down, why are you so jittery?"

"Everyone is lookin at us like we're a bunch of freaks." He replied. "Three dudes and one pregnant chick, we're like Three men and a Baby in real life."

"You're Steve Guttenburg." Sam replied as he clicked on his phone.

Dean ignored the jab. "You know they're wondering what the hell we're all doin here. This ain't normal."

I glanced around the waiting room. "I really don't think anyone is paying much attention to us, but they will if you keep acting so jumpy."

He averted his eyes to the ceiling, and started singing Metallica quietly to himself before a nurse stepped into the room and called out the alias Cas had given for me.

Cas and I stood, then followed by Sam and Dean and the woman stared at us strangely.

"Um, all of you are coming back?" She questioned.

"Yeah that's kind of a long story." I replied.

"Normally we don't allow more than three people in the room, but I guess we can make an exception. If the Mother is comfortable with it, then it shouldn't be a problem." She waved us back. "Follow me."

I went first followed by the conga line of dudes behind me. Dean was so stiff as he walked, keeping his eyes planted firmly on the floor as though a door would open and he'd see something traumatizing.

Yeah, this was definitely odd to look at. But no one was willing to take any chances. Even if it meant everyone thinking we were some freak jobs, Sam and Dean didn't want us going back alone just in case a dick hole angel might pop up. You never knew when to expect the little assholes, so I guess we were willing to take the risk of getting gawked or laughed at.

When we entered the examining room I hid behind a curtain and changed into a scratchy gown, then flopped down on the bed. Sam and Dean were looking everywhere but the pictures, and plastic displays of womens private parts that showed the progression of pregnancy and eventually birth. I swear, these two, it's as though they didn't know where babies came from.

Cas was perfectly calm as he flicked through a pamphlet that explained breastfeeding.

"If the doctor doesn't get in here soon I'm gonna pee my pants." I stated. "What sick nazi doctor decided it was a good idea to make a pregnant chick drink an entire liter of water and then just sit around and suffer?"

"Unfortunately it's required in order to have a clearer picture on the ultrasound." Cas replied.

Dean tore his eyes off the floor tiles long enough to stare at him. "Ya know, I'm starting to think maybe Cas should just deliver the baby, since he seems to know everything. Save on hospital bills."

Cas lowered his pamphlet. "Dean, I couldn't do that. I'm not a doctor."

"Yeah, we know, uh-" Sam said now. "Guys, I think we need to talk about what we're gonna do when it actually does come time for Lara to have this kid."

"What you mean?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Well I don't think it would be such a good idea to have it in a hospital, do you?"

"Why not?" Cas sat up straight. "Where else would she have it?"

"That's what we need to figure out. I mean, this kid... _Isn't _human. It has according to Samandriel, devastating powers. There's no way of knowing what might happen once it's..." Now he started in with hand motions. "Out."

Now we all stared at each other before I groaned. "Oh great, I'm gonna be one of those people that give birth the back seat of a car, or in a kiddie pool full of warm water, aren't I?"

"No," Dean shook his head. "It won't come to that- But Sammy's right. Not only do we have to worry about the angels showin up, but this kid could come out nuking everything."

Cas' lips cinched. "So what are you suggesting? That she give birth in a room _alone_ surrounded by ten feet thick concrete walls?"

"No. But we do need to figure out what to do. She can't have the kid in a hospital, it's too risky."

Well this was just fucking dandy. I never even thought that I wouldn't be able to have this kid in a hospital. Yes, I planned on having it the natural way, completely hocked up on painkillers numb from the waist down... If I couldn't do that in a hospital, then what the heck was I supposed to do?

When the doctor finally walked in she paused for a moment to stare at everyone in the room.

"Hello, Lara-" She said, smiling. "I see we have a full house today. I'm Doctor Garret, and considering how many are in here I have to ask which one is the Dad?"

Cas started to raise his hand before Dean cleared his throat. "Let's just say we all are gonna have a part in this."

"He's the Dad-" I said pointing to Cas. "They're just the uncles. We're a really close family, obviously."

Her face went blank but she nodded despite the awkwardness. "Alright, well... We need to start off with a pelvic exam- So, if your brothers would want to step into the hallway?"

"We're good." Dean retorted. "We'll just hide behind the curtain."

After he said that the woman seemed to freeze. "Uh, well... Alright."

"Believe me-" I said now. "This isn't even the weirdest thing they've done _today_. This is actually pretty normal for our family."

Ok maybe not, but I couldn't exactly tell her the real reason why my brothers wanted to stay in the room. Even though there hadn't been any signs of angels in this place, it seemed as though Sam and Dean expected one to the just climb out of the walls or something.

So after a seriously uncomfortable pelvic exam and a slew of awkward questions, she started in with the ultrasound. Finally my brothers crawled out from behind the curtain.

Cas and I both stared at the screen and after the baby became visible his grip tightened on my hand.

"Alright there we are-" The doctor smiled. "So are we wanting to know the sex of the baby?"

While Dean and I answered yes, Sam and Cas answered no.

"Isn't it too early to tell?" I asked. "I thought I needed to be like 18 weeks or more?"

"Sometimes, it really depends on the baby and how it's positioned. I think I could spot it if you wanted to know?"

Cas and I exchanged glances, and I shrugged.

"You don't wanna know what it is?"

He shook his head. "No, I wanted it to be a surprise."

Dean crossed his arms and sighed. "I kinda wanted to know what you're having. Maybe the Doc could just tell me?"

"No way," I snapped back. "How unfair is that? If I don't get to know then no one gets to know."

I wasn't an idiot- I knew what Dean was thinking. He wanted to make sure this kid wasn't going to be a boy, because in his trip to the future the kid Lucifer and I had together was a boy.

The doctor ignored our mini argument before printing up a few of the ultrasound pictures.

"Well if you change your mind just call into the office. It'll be on file."

"So," Sam stood tall. "You already know what it is?"

"Sure do." She smiled. "Everything seems to be going good, Lara. But we're still going to take some blood work and run tests. Don't worry, it's normal we do it with everyone. You can go ahead and get dressed and should be outa here within the next fifteen minutes."

She handed the printed out pictures to Cas, and once she was gone he wouldn't tare his eyes away from them.

"At least it doesn't look like a cashew anymore." I said. "You can tell it's a baby now."

Cas only smiled.

"Gimme one of those." Dean said, snatching a picture from Cas' hands. "You can't hog em all."

Dean winked at me before stuffing the picture in his wallet.

After hiding behind the curtain and getting dressed, we waited around for my blood to be drawn, then finally left the doctors office.

That was an... _Interesting_ experience. But not nearly as bad as I figured it would be.

"I'm starving." I announced. "Let's go grab something before we go home, huh?"

Dean was all for that and after a thorough examination of the people inside and outside the diner, it was deemed safe enough to enter. So we grabbed a booth and waited to be served.

"Ok, so really-" Sam said. "We need to talk about what we're gonna do when Lara is ready to have this kid."

Cas, who had been eying the pictures since we left the doctor, finally looked up. "If you're insisting that she not give birth in a hospital, then we're going to have to find a way to bring the hospital to her."

"So what?" Dean shrugged. "Kidnap a doctor and some nurses?"

"It might come down to that," Sam sighed. "I mean yeah I know it's drastic, but we can't deliver the kid."

"Ya know, I'm not really happy about this. Seriously, put yourselves in my situation. I'm gonna be in excruciating pain, I'll need drugs."

Cas arched a brow at me. "You don't plan on having this child naturally?"

"Uh," I snorted. "Until you shoot a person out of of some small orifice of _your_ body, you don't get to lecture me."

He squinted his eyes at me but didn't argue because really, no one could argue with that logic.

We ordered our food a short time later, and went silent as we waited. That silence didn't last long before we heard a gruff.

"Hello, boys."

Each of us shifted in our seat to stare up at Crowley, who stood there ever so smugly with a smirk and his arms behind his back.

Oh holy crap...


	20. Chapter 20

Dean instinctively reached for the knife in his jacket, but was met with a wagging of Crowleys finger.

"Now now, Dean- Look around you. We're in a crowded restaurant full of witnesses. Do you really think you can go and stab me in the face?" He said.

Deans face contorted into pure hot rage but he hadn't a choice but to leave the weapon hidden.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Cas asked.

Sometime during the moments of sheer terror he had squished himself so close to me in the booth I was smashed against the wall, like he was some sort of human shield.

Crowley only smiled before grabbing a chair from an empty table and sitting down at the end of our booth.

"I wanted to talk to you ages ago, but considering you're always on the go it has been hard to track you down. Then of course, there's the moments where it seems you blip off the face of the earth and no matter how much I sniff I can't find your scent." He sneered.

Obviously he meant when we were in the bunker. We were invisible to anyone and everything while being locked in there.

"What do you want?" Sam asked now. "Let me guess, some sort of deal?"

Crowley shrugged, stealing Sams cup of coffee and taking a sip. "Hello, King of Hell- Of course I like to make deals, but you needn't worry your pretty mop head, Moose- I'm not here to ask for your retched souls or anything of the like. Believe it or not... I'm actually here to help."

"Help?" Dean growled. "Help with what?"

Crowley then reached into his own jacket and pulled out a tablet... Another stone tablet... Looking eerily similar to the Angel and Demon tablet Kevin had read through.

"I thought you might fancy this?" He said, waving it in the air, then sitting it down on the table with a thunk.

"What the hell is that?" I asked, even though it was completely obvious it was another word of god.

"It took me bloody forever to track this down-" Crowley spat. "I swear, these damn things are hidden so well it's a wonder that anyone ever found them to begin with. If I had to guess, I would say that God didn't want them to be read."

"Answer the damn question, Crowley." Dean spat. "What the hell is that?"

Crowleys brows rose. "It's the Seraphim tablet. Why, what did you think it was?" When we all fell silent, he tapped his fingers on the table. "It's something you _would _like in your possession... Right?"

"Wait a second..." I sat up. "Why would you want to give us the seraphim tablet?"

He sighed and rolled his eyes. "Look, I know what you're thinking. I'm a demon, blah blah blah. I'm horrible and dangerous and ghastly. But, not so much anymore. Believe me, I'd like nothing better than to peel off someones face and run around wearing it as a trophy, but considering what Moose did to me, being wicked isn't so easy anymore. Not with this new bloody conscience of mine."

"Right," Sam snorted. "And we're just supposed to believe you're giving us this tablet out of the goodness of your heart?"

"I have no heart, I have no soul. But, I suppose yes you could look at it that way."

"You're lying." Cas said. "You always have ulterior motives to the things you do. How're we to expect any different this time around?"

Crowleys eyes jumped from each of before he shrugged. "Well, I suppose you're right. I do have a favor to ask."

"Whatever it is, forget it." Dean said, reaching over quickly and grabbing the tablet. "You can go now."

"Come on, at least hear me out? For old times sake?"

"Old times sake?" Sam shook his head. "Our old times usually resulted in us getting our asses kicked. It's not like we have good memories with you in it."

"That hurts my feelings," Crowley scowled. "We've been through quite a bit together, you and I." He leaned forward. "After all, it's your fault that I'm reduced to this... This... Whatever the hell you want to call what I am now. I can't even do my bloody job as the King of Hell anymore after your little curing escapade." We only gave our own little smirks as he went on. "Do you know how hard it is to run Hell when you're cursed with a conscience that won't let you do anything? It's impossible, and don't get me started on the demons beneath me. They're all laughing at me!"

I crossed my arms and snickered. "I'm kinda laughing at you too."

Dean lectured me with his eyes before sighing. "What do you want? Not like we'll do it, but you can ask if it'll shut you up."

Crowleys face went blank for a moment. "Really? Well at least you're letting me ask..." He nodded. "I thought maybe if I helped you a little here and there, if we worked out a sort of amicable relationship, perhaps when the time comes that Laras child is born you won't use it to smite me."

"Wow, how'd I know that's what you were gonna say." Dean replied. "No deal, Crowley."

"At least think it over. Really, so I hear you're slightly undermanned in this upcoming war. All I have to do is snap my fingers and you could have more soldiers at your disposal than you could think of. All I ask in return, is that you just let me go on with my own business, don't reduce me to a pile of ashes... That's all."

"Hm, let me think about that," Cas said, his tone flippant. "An army of demons, or _you_ a smoking pile of ashes. I think I like the second option better. Do you really believe that we would want demons fighting along side of us?"

"No good?" Crowley sat up straight. "I'm sure we could think of something else. At least consider it because you know that being on my bad side isn't exactly beneficial."

"You wanna help us out?" I said now. "Then just go away."

We all expected his expression to turn dark, instead he looked like someone had stolen his puppy. No, I would never adjust to seeing Crowley actually look like something other than a horrible evil monster.

"Keep the tablet," He said, standing. "I suppose I'll just have to sweeten the pot, won't I?"

No one responded because he suddenly vanished.

"Ook," Dean said, pulling the tablet from his jacket. "What the hell are we gonna do now?"

"We knew it was only a matter of time before Crowley showed himself." Cas replied.

I reached over and grabbed the tablet, examining it closely. "You think this is the real deal?"

Cas carefully took it from my hands, letting his eyes scale over the intricate writing. "It's definitely like the others. It doesn't appear to be a forgery, and if it is... It's a very good one."

"But how exactly would he forge it?" Sam asked. "If it's written in a language that only one prophet can read?"

"Exactly," Cas retorted, not taking his eyes off the writing. "Which is why it probably is the real deal."

"How did we not even know there was a seraphim tablet anyways? That's what I wanna know. And how exactly Crowley found out about it before we did?" I added.

"He was probably looking for it long before you ever got pregnant." Cas sighed. "He's had some sort of twisted interest in you from the beginning, or else he never would have abducted you so long ago."

"Remind me again why exactly that son of a bitch is still breathing?" Dean snapped. "Why hasn't he been priority number 1 on the list of monsters to gank?"

"Because he's Crowley-" Sam answered. "Which means he's good at dodging us..." He sat back and lost interest in his salad. "So I guess this means that we gotta call Kevin, huh? Ask the kid to come and read the tablet?"

Dean tapped his fingers on the table. "Yeah, sure he's gonna love that, right?"

* * *

Castiel shifted slightly under the covers, noticing Lara had fallen asleep some time ago. He had been pretending to read through one of his books for the better part of an hour, waiting for her to drift off- But she seemed more restless than usual, unable to find a comfortable position. Normally Lara wasn't a very sound sleeper, the least little noise and she'd bolt upright- But ever since she became pregnant, once she fell asleep she was dead to the world.

He thumped his book closed and carefully lied it on the bedside table- For a moment he actually contemplating not getting up for fear of actually waking her. Had she, he would have to explain what he was doing up so late at night, and he wasn't exactly the best liar in the world. She always saw through it, but- He had decided earlier that evening that should she discover what he was going to be doing that night, then he would simply tell her it was research on the newly received seraphim tablet.

Sam had left for the lengthy drive to pick Kevin up in Michigan earlier that evening, while Dean had gotten started on preparing the library for the prophets arrival. He was actually rather compliant when he learned a new tablet had appeared, and didn't argue once when Dean had asked if he would come and translate it.

After pulling the covers off of him, he slowly inched his way to the edge of the bed, careful to gently lie Laras arm down on the pillows, since it had been draped across his abdomen.

He was doing this for her, and for their unborn child- He kept telling himself that, over and over again. But still, it didn't seem to make him feel much better. Especially since he had made a promise to Dean. Unfortunately this went past promises, he needed to do what was necessary for the safety of his family. So after he successfully slithered out of bed without so much as even a budge from Lara, he stared down at her for a moment, letting out a quiet sigh.

She was going to be so angry, more than angry... There was a chance she might never forgive him for this. Those thoughts almost made him halt entirely, until she rolled over slightly, her hand falling down in sleep to rest on her stomach. That small action forced his hands to clench into fists at his sides.

Their child didn't deserve what was coming... It didn't deserve to be born into a world where it would be mercilessly hunted. Being in constant danger, not having a happy life. It wasn't fair. So with that thought in mind he quietly left the bedroom, closing the door behind him and heading to the library.

The books he had been reading throughout the last few weeks after Lara and the boys had fallen asleep were waiting for him on the shelf. He had kept them there, positioned in an area that no one would notice. Sam never read through the books on that shelf, and Dean didn't read much period- Lara, usually only glanced over books that held relevance to whatever sort of job they were considering. So far, in the weeks he had been reading them, no one had noticed them at all. So he grabbed them from their not so well hiding spot, and moved over to the leather armchair in the corner where a lamp waited. After flicking it on, he flipped it open to the pages where he left off.

Honestly he didn't feel as though he would have much luck at finding any information on what he wanted. He had never heard of something like this before, and very much doubted something could be done about it. An angel who had his grace forcefully removed wouldn't be able to get it back unless the one who had stolen it decided to return it. Which wouldn't happen. Metatron was enjoying his alone time locked in heaven, there wouldn't be a chance he'd give it back. So that meant he needed to find something else, anything else.

He had been reading for several hours when finally his eyes stopped, going wide.

"It can't be... Can it?" He muttered to himself, frantically turning the pages. Once he read it over five times more he gave a small sigh. "So it _is _possible?"

He wasn't quite sure to be happy or feel complete and utter terror over what he just found.

If this was true, which he couldn't help but think it was since it was documented by the men of letters. A fallen angel who had become a human had the opportunity to retrieve grace yet again. Only, it wasn't their own that was taken. But, anothers.

"Remove an angels grace, and make it your own with the proper incantation..." His eyes trailed off at the dark library. "I would be stealing another angels essence, and using it on myself?"

Grace was grace regardless of the source, but to think that he would be taking it from a man or woman without their consent made him no better than Metatron. Of course he always had the option of stealing it from one of his enemies.

This was going to require deep consideration. He would need to come to terms with what he would be giving up, and what would be expected of him afterwards. It wasn't as simple as to just rip an angels grace out and absorb it into himself. Everything would change- The life he had actually grown to love over the years would be gone. He enjoyed being human now, there was so much more to look forward to. Yes he had emotions as an angel, but only after a long period of time. But they weren't nearly as strong as they were now. He hated the thought of possibly returning to the cold shell of a being he had once been, especially since he was going to have a child. He wouldn't want that child to believe he didn't care for it.

He closed the book and lied it in his lap. There would be no way he could make this decision now. As much as he wanted to make himself capable of protecting Lara and the baby, he couldn't allow that to alter his judgement. He had been hasty in the past, and always things ended horribly. That's one thing he wouldn't allow to happen this time around.


End file.
